Sad transexual on HBO's Taxicap Confession

[Bionca]

Pregnancy can be a thing for trans women. My 7 year relationship broke up because my guy got a woman pregnant and decided that being a husband and father was what he really wanted (expecting to keep me on the side as his secret). It was a huge blow. It's really the thing I can't do and will never be able to do.

This also gets used against us lots. By guys who date us (We can't be serious because I want kids), and by non-trans women (You'll never be a *real* woman because you don't bleed once a month).

[smc]

Originally Posted by Bionca

This also gets used against us lots. By guys who date us (We can't be serious because I want kids), and by non-trans women (You'll never be a *real* woman because you don't bleed once a month).

Guys like you describe above, Bionca, are the type who make me ashamed to be a man in the same way that I am often ashamed -- because of what my government does -- to be an American. But just like an American can work to change what the government does (even if it sometimes seems rather futile), an man can diligently call out other men when they pull crap like you're describing, and if not change those men, show others the difference between right and wrong.

[jolo]

SMC,

I am sorry, but I don't understand what the government has to do with this.

In my opinion, idiotic social attitudes, bigotry and ignorance by those who believe nonsensical stereotypes about the role that women and men are "supposed" to play seem to be what causes this stuff.

I recall, for myself, as a male, I was surprised about my own embedded stereotypical beliefs after my job and a few thousand others, were off shored. It was done by department and had nothing to do with individuals, but it was done by a headquarters office, by department.

After it occurred, even though I had consistent excellent reviews, I felt less than a man, because I lost my long time job/career. I struggled with feelings of "loss of manhood", because I didn't have my "career" anymore.
Jon

Originally Posted by smc

Guys like you describe above, Bionca, are the type who make me ashamed to be a man in the same way that I am often ashamed -- because of what my government does -- to be an American. But just like an American can work to change what the government does (even if it sometimes seems rather futile), an man can diligently call out other men when they pull crap like you're describing, and if not change those men, show others the difference between right and wrong.

[smc]

Originally Posted by jolo

SMC,

I am sorry, but I don't understand what the government has to do with this.

I was simply drawing an analogy. I never wrote that the government has anything to do with it. The analogy was about my feelings about this.

[Bionca]

My ex and I had an open relationship. It made sense since he was 10 years older that I, his job made him travel all over, I was in school just beginning my transition, and I hadn't really experimented with dating/flirting/being sexual as a woman.

He did break two of the important rules for the relationship: Always practice safer sex and don't fuck people we both know (he messed around with a co-worker who had met me in passing.

To bring this back to the first post. This is the kick in the gut for me. I know lots of women don't have children, don't want children, can't have children and that this is not what being a woman is any more than liking pink or having long hair.

Knowing all this, it still feels like a slap when someone brings it up. It is the one thing that no surgery, no pills, nothing will be able to fix. It's the single slippery rug under my feet that can be pulled out at any time to justify why I'm not a "real *enough* woman".

Sometimes I am ashamed of my fellow “brothers” out there. My fianc?e cannot have children but that does not make her any “less of a woman” to me. That someone would use this excuse to break off a relationship is despicable. As Shadows said:

Doing something like that shows how much of a man he really was...which is to say not very much of one. For me, a relationship should be based on love, and if you love that person you don't let anything get in the way of that love. You love that person unconditionally.

Maybe some “ass kicking” is in order… I can do that.

[sosed]

In my opinion majority of people, males and females, wish to have their own families and children. But sometimes happened, that someone could not have his/her own children because of many reasons. In that case partners must take a decision and stand behind their decision.

Even to be in couple with genetic girl doesn't mean you will have for 100% children. Could happened, that girl could not have children or that I could not have children. In that case if we love each other and together decide to stay together, than this is our decision and we must stay behind it.

The same is to be in couple with trans girl. In that case we both know, that we could not have our own children. If we decide to stay together in relationship or marriage, than this is our own decision and we must both stay behind it.

Breaking your own decision and searching for excuses is very unresponsible to yourself and to your partner. This actually show what personality someone have.

[locco86]

Originally Posted by Bionca

My ex and I had an open relationship. It made sense since he was 10 years older that I, his job made him travel all over, I was in school just beginning my transition, and I hadn't really experimented with dating/flirting/being sexual as a woman.

He did break two of the important rules for the relationship: Always practice safer sex and don't fuck people we both know (he messed around with a co-worker who had met me in passing.

To bring this back to the first post. This is the kick in the gut for me. I know lots of women don't have children, don't want children, can't have children and that this is not what being a woman is any more than liking pink or having long hair.

Knowing all this, it still feels like a slap when someone brings it up. It is the one thing that no surgery, no pills, nothing will be able to fix. It's the single slippery rug under my feet that can be pulled out at any time to justify why I'm not a "real *enough* woman".

bionca..... you don't need to be sad about this thing... sincerely, i don;t want to have kids, i dont; why but i don;t. A tranny or a transexual is someting special, out of the pattern so why start thinking in the pattern that society teach us? during time human thinking evolved from what bible said to us to the free judgement! i think u just met the wrong person! i can;t say that i'm with you because i'm hundreds miles away.... but i feel ur sadness!
and one more thing.... all that sh#t you have been trough made the wonderfull person u are now!

[jolo]

Lovely Bionca,

I can't imagine the hurt that you felt. Then again, the guy sounds out like he cheated on you, behind your back and you certainly deserve a man of better ethics and character.
The pregnancy not only can be a thing for trans women. but for all women in general. I am sure that after seven years, you trusted your man and obviously he knew the situation.

Heck, I was dumped after sixteen years of marriage for becoming ill, but that is another story.

Jon

Originally Posted by Bionca

Pregnancy can be a thing for trans women. My 7 year relationship broke up because my guy got a woman pregnant and decided that being a husband and father was what he really wanted (expecting to keep me on the side as his secret). It was a huge blow. It's really the thing I can't do and will never be able to do.

This also gets used against us lots. By guys who date us (We can't be serious because I want kids), and by non-trans women (You'll never be a *real* woman because you don't bleed once a month).

[shadows]

Originally Posted by Bionca

Pregnancy can be a thing for trans women. My 7 year relationship broke up because my guy got a woman pregnant and decided that being a husband and father was what he really wanted (expecting to keep me on the side as his secret). It was a huge blow. It's really the thing I can't do and will never be able to do.

This also gets used against us lots. By guys who date us (We can't be serious because I want kids), and by non-trans women (You'll never be a *real* woman because you don't bleed once a month).

Doing something like that shows how much of a man he really was...which is to say not very much of one. For me, a relationship should be based on love, and if you love that person you don't let anything get in the way of that love. You love that person unconditionally.

That was a pretty weak argument on his part. Babies can be adopted and not all women can get pregnant. I don't know. Throwing away 7 years for that just doesn't make any sense to me. And to show that much disrespect to you? It just boggles the mind!