Why don't you already have a transsexual girlfriend?

[Amy]

Because many of us are already happily attached?

[JodieTs]

Do not under any circumstances dated a recent transitioner.
They will do your fuckin' head in.

If you want to go out with them, first ask this:
"How long ago did you transition?"
Anything less than three years, walk away.
Seriously, just walk away.

[JodieTs]

My other partner, a man, says this:

It's a strange thing to want to do, date a class of person,
rather than to want to date a particular person:
ie.
"I want to date a random transsexual transsexual person"
vs.
"I want to date Janet, who happens to be a transsexual person"

[locco86]

Originally Posted by JodieTs

Do not under any circumstances dated a recent transitioner.
They will do your fuckin' head in.

If you want to go out with them, first ask this:
"How long ago did you transition?"
Anything less than three years, walk away.
Seriously, just walk away.

i didn't understand what do u mean by this

[9yneGuy]

Because seeking a tgirl out soley because she's transgendered doesn't sit right with me. That kind of seems just as bad as seeking them out soley for sex. I want to fall in love with a person, not who the person is. If I like someone enough, it won't matter if they're a genetic or a tgirl.

[ila]

Originally Posted by 9yneGuy

Because seeking a tgirl out soley because she's transgendered doesn't sit right with me. That kind of seems just as bad as seeking them out soley for sex. I want to fall in love with a person, not who the person is. If I like someone enough, it won't matter if they're a genetic or a tgirl.

I didn't seek out my girl because she is trans. We met (right here on this site) and I was attracted to her for who she is. And now I'm in love with her and I couldn't be happier.

[Garygeegary]

I dont know any tg girls from the north east of england and plus i like them for who they are and not what gender

It would have been nice to meet someone from this site as ila did but my fortunes would take me in another direction. I recently became engaged to a beautiful cis woman I met last summer. We will be getting married March 5th. She knows of my trans friends and supports my activities in LGBT rights, Stopping the Hate, my university?s Advocacy group, and other things. She even knows who Kelly Shore is! I suspect you will see me around here for a while.

[jolo]

Ila,

I really like your post.
It is the friendship, respect, commitment and you both have to each other that make a relationship/partnership last. That is what brings love.

Normally at the beginning, people mix up being "In Lust", for being "In Love".

Jon

Originally Posted by ila

I didn't seek out my girl because she is trans. We met (right here on this site) and I was attracted to her for who she is. And now I'm in love with her and I couldn't be happier.

[O'Sully TS Hopeful]

Originally Posted by ila

I didn't seek out my girl because she is trans. We met (right here on this site) and I was attracted to her for who she is. And now I'm in love with her and I couldn't be happier.

And I'm so privileged to be that girl your talking about. I couldn't agree more with you, honey, we love each other for who we are. Love you

[ila]

Originally Posted by O'Sully TS Hopeful

And I'm so privileged to be that girl your talking about. I couldn't agree more with you, honey, we love each other for who we are. Love you

And I love you too, sweetheart.

[JodieTs]

Originally Posted by ila

I didn't seek out my girl because she is trans. We met (right here on this site) and I was attracted to her for who she is. And now I'm in love with her and I couldn't be happier.

That's exactly how I met my man.
And what you say above could have come right out of his mouth.
Having a man who wants us for who we are rather than 'that thing about us'
counts for everything.

[9yneGuy]

Originally Posted by ila

I didn't seek out my girl because she is trans. We met (right here on this site) and I was attracted to her for who she is. And now I'm in love with her and I couldn't be happier.

And that's the way I think it should be. Congrats.

[JodieTs]

Quote:
Originally Posted by JodieTs View Post
Do not under any circumstances dated a recent transitioner.
They will do your fuckin' head in.

If you want to go out with them, first ask this:
"How long ago did you transition?"
Anything less than three years, walk away.
Seriously, just walk away.

Originally Posted by locco86

i didn't understand what do u mean by this

Oh early transition, we have so many issues to work through
that it overspills into any relationship.

My man just asked how long I'd transitioned when we first met...
A. 2 years 9 months....
{well he is very tolerant}

[Trogdor]

Between the fact that Michigan is full of 'midwestern values' and bigots in Detroit, and the that I can't find any of the over here....and the only ones in my neck of the woods look exactly like John Goodman and Graham Chapman in dresses .....it's hard to find that perfect someone where I am.

The Michigan is simply NOT like either New York or California.

[racquel]

Everybody kinda has a type. Maybe 75% of the girls you've dated have big tits. Maybe you've dated several black girls. But when you overly fixate on a type it gets a little creepy. There's a small-ish bar in Phoenix where the trans girls outnumber the genetic girls. Sure, in your average bar guys are just trying to get laid most of the time, but in a tranny meat-market you'll often run into guys who are totally unapologetic about being married and just wanting you to come back to their hotel room while they're in town on business without even getting you a drink.

In the average bar, at least 95% of guys who start a conversation with me are totally friendly, get me a drink, are fine just talking for awhlie, and will maybe try to give me their number or say they'd like to go out to dinner or a movie or whatever sometime.

In the average TS-leaning bar (or a gay bar where I'm hanging out with the TG crowd), I'll run into TS people or gay guys who are totally friendly, but when it comes to guys looking to hook up, they're fucking ridiculous. 95% of them would never even entertain the idea of being seen in public in daylight with the tranny they're trying to fuck.

So many people here claim they want a relationship with a TS girl, but are they really being honest with themselves?

Like Bionca was saying, they want 100% passable girls, but how's that supposed to work? You want TS girls to walk around with signs saying they have a penis, but then once you meet them you want them to burn the sign and never tell anybody?

This all makes me wonder how much of a relationship they really want if they're so hung-up on passability. I don't think it's about them equating passability with attractiveness. I think it's because they're in the closet and they never want anybody to know they've got a bit of a cock fixation.

If you're in the closet, you have no room to complain if the only kind of tranny you can get is a middle-aged crossdresser who is also in the closet about your encounter.

I'm not the hottest girl in the world, but I'm OK, and I get hit on. I don't really get read much, and when I do I think it's more about me being 6'0". Compared to the local TG crowd, I'm doing pretty well. I think there are a lot of guys looking for TS girls and I do kinda catch their eye being tall. It often seems like the guys trying the hardest to pick me up have a little bit of a clue.

But the guys trying the hardest to pick me up would really be better off looking through shemale escort listings. They're thinking I'm probably trans, and that little thing they picked up on that makes them think I have a penis means they're going to want me to be their dirty little secret because they're afraid their friends and family might figure it out, too, if I met them.

And this is the way people here feel, too, for the most part, or they wouldn't make such a big deal about passability.

If you really do have respect for TS girls, then it shouldn't be hard to get a little involved with the local TS community. I lived in Dayton, Ohio for 7 years. If there's a TS community there, you can find one anywhere.

Think long and hard about what you're really looking for. I know the idea of being yourself and coming out of the closet and not worrying if someone sees you with a girl with big feet might seem like something you could never do, but you'd probably die a happier person if you did. It might be nearly impossible, and maybe you're just trying to get laid, but good luck finding any sympathy from the TG crowd, because they've usually gone through plenty themselves. If you're never really going to want a relationship and you just want some T-girl cock on the down-low, be honest about it. And don't be a cheap bastard. Support a shemale hooker. That's what they're there for.

Originally Posted by Trogdor

Between the fact that Michigan is full of 'midwestern values' and bigots in Detroit, and the that I can't find any of the over here....and the only ones in my neck of the woods look exactly like John Goodman and Graham Chapman in dresses .....it's hard to find that perfect someone where I am.

The Michigan is simply NOT like either New York or California.

As someone who spent their whole life in Ohio till last year, I know where you're coming from. And actually, since I went to OSU I'm supposed to hate you...

But seriously, if you were nice to the John Goodmans and weren't afraid to say hi, you'd probably eventually meet Goodman's more passable TS friends.

[Bionca]

@Jodie - yes, the first few years are pretty messy. We are going through puberty all over again - the only up side is we know what's happening, so we can kinda muddle through with our self respect and most relationships intact.

In many ways the first few years of transition we are equally destroying our old lives while building our new ones. Job, friends, family, relationships... everything is in flux and nothing is certain. Our self-image takes routine beatings as we look kinda awkward and get easily clocked. Our focus is often on saving/making money for surgeries and hormones to the point of obsession (see previous sentence).

While I had a serious relationship with a guy through the first 7 years of my transition, in retrospect I sure wouldn't have dated me.

[Bionca]

@Raquel - everything you said +1.

Guys who don't know I'm trans trying to pick me up are so sweet and pay attention to what I say. they engage me as a person with interests and opinions. Guys in a heavy trans environment make me feel like those interests and opinions are what keeps the cock life support system entertained while they aren't around.

The part about the drink made me laugh because it's true. I sometimes think chasers are either seriously cheap, broke, or think we are so desperate they don't have to do more than show up (sadly I think the latter, sadder still I think we make it easy for them to think this).

[Trogdor]

Originally Posted by racquel

Everybody kinda has a type. Maybe 75% of the girls you've dated have big tits. Maybe you've dated several black girls. But when you overly fixate on a type it gets a little creepy. There's a small-ish bar in Phoenix where the trans girls outnumber the genetic girls. Sure, in your average bar guys are just trying to get laid most of the time, but in a tranny meat-market you'll often run into guys who are totally unapologetic about being married and just wanting you to come back to their hotel room while they're in town on business without even getting you a drink.

In the average bar, at least 95% of guys who start a conversation with me are totally friendly, get me a drink, are fine just talking for awhlie, and will maybe try to give me their number or say they'd like to go out to dinner or a movie or whatever sometime.

In the average TS-leaning bar (or a gay bar where I'm hanging out with the TG crowd), I'll run into TS people or gay guys who are totally friendly, but when it comes to guys looking to hook up, they're fucking ridiculous. 95% of them would never even entertain the idea of being seen in public in daylight with the tranny they're trying to fuck.

So many people here claim they want a relationship with a TS girl, but are they really being honest with themselves?

Like Bionca was saying, they want 100% passable girls, but how's that supposed to work? You want TS girls to walk around with signs saying they have a penis, but then once you meet them you want them to burn the sign and never tell anybody?

This all makes me wonder how much of a relationship they really want if they're so hung-up on passability. I don't think it's about them equating passability with attractiveness. I think it's because they're in the closet and they never want anybody to know they've got a bit of a cock fixation.

If you're in the closet, you have no room to complain if the only kind of tranny you can get is a middle-aged crossdresser who is also in the closet about your encounter.

I'm not the hottest girl in the world, but I'm OK, and I get hit on. I don't really get read much, and when I do I think it's more about me being 6'0". Compared to the local TG crowd, I'm doing pretty well. I think there are a lot of guys looking for TS girls and I do kinda catch their eye being tall. It often seems like the guys trying the hardest to pick me up have a little bit of a clue.

But the guys trying the hardest to pick me up would really be better off looking through shemale escort listings. They're thinking I'm probably trans, and that little thing they picked up on that makes them think I have a penis means they're going to want me to be their dirty little secret because they're afraid their friends and family might figure it out, too, if I met them.

And this is the way people here feel, too, for the most part, or they wouldn't make such a big deal about passability.

If you really do have respect for TS girls, then it shouldn't be hard to get a little involved with the local TS community. I lived in Dayton, Ohio for 7 years. If there's a TS community there, you can find one anywhere.

Think long and hard about what you're really looking for. I know the idea of being yourself and coming out of the closet and not worrying if someone sees you with a girl with big feet might seem like something you could never do, but you'd probably die a happier person if you did. It might be nearly impossible, and maybe you're just trying to get laid, but good luck finding any sympathy from the TG crowd, because they've usually gone through plenty themselves. If you're never really going to want a relationship and you just want some T-girl cock on the down-low, be honest about it. And don't be a cheap bastard. Support a shemale hooker. That's what they're there for.





As someone who spent their whole life in Ohio till last year, I know where you're coming from. And actually, since I went to OSU I'm supposed to hate you...

But seriously, if you were nice to the John Goodmans and weren't afraid to say hi, you'd probably eventually meet Goodman's more passable TS friends.

Well, the married guys being in the bars, looking for some action, they are there, more often than not, because the misses at home is not giving them what want to begin with, or the marriage went sour....women do it also, not just the men. I've seen this happening with friends and family since I a kid no longer sitting in my own poop.

Wen looking for a transgirl, I ask her neither to hold up a sign, nor to burn it up. I was looking a few photos of the aforementioned English transgirl I got my eyes on, and my aunt asked who she was and where I met her. I told her I met her on a trans forum. She looked at me, all disgusted and she asked, "She's still got her dick and you want to date her?!" I simply said to her, "Yes, yes I do. DEAL WITH IT." I'm not afraid of everyone knowing.

I myself am not in any closet, so it's no big deal.

And I am all fine and nice with the "John Goodman's" , I'm simply saying that I have no desire to date one is all.

I only met ONE cute transgirl in Michigan, but she was a total cast-iron, ice queen.

Anyhow, I'm looking to find me a cutie to date, to go out with, to do stuff a dude or chick would do with a chick, and so on. And as I said, I gave up on g-girls....got hurt too much by them (sorry, g-girls, but 95% of you are just savage brutes, more so than most guys.), and I can't even stand the sight of a vagina to begin with, I'm not the typical, red blooded, beer drinking American male that's on the constant hunt for pussy. Tried, and it just did not work for me.

[smc]

Originally Posted by Trogdor

Anyhow, I'm looking to find me a cutie to date, to go out with, to do stuff a dude or chick would do with a chick, and so on. And as I said, I gave up on g-girls....got hurt too much by them (sorry, g-girls, but 95% of you are just savage brutes, more so than most guys.), and I can't even stand the sight of a vagina to begin with, I'm not the typical, red blooded, beer drinking American male that's on the constant hunt for pussy. Tried, and it just did not work for me.

When I read a generalization such as the one I've highlighted in boldface above, I always want to ask those who make them whether they realize that such hyperbole is nearly always a reflection of them, not of the reality of the world around them. I mention this only because, Trogdor, if you can make such a hyperbolic comment so easily, you might want to explore how you come across more generally when you're out there being "not typical". I offer this suggestion with respect and no particular judgment.