Ungendering and a Lack of Respect

[ImAlittleCurious]

I'll try and add a few things. I know. I am still fairly new here. And might have said a thing or two, that might seem "Disrespectful." And I'm sorry for that.

Most of it has to do with.. Stepping into a new community. And at the same time being scared of fully admitting I'm into these woman..

[smc]

Originally Posted by ImAlittleCurious

I'll try and add a few things. I know. I am still fairly new here. And might have said a thing or two, that might seem "Disrespectful." And I'm sorry for that.

Most of it has to do with.. Stepping into a new community. And at the same time being scared of fully admitting I'm into these woman..

This is a good community within which to overcome your fear.

[IronCity]

Originally Posted by ImAlittleCurious

I'll try and add a few things. I know. I am still fairly new here. And might have said a thing or two, that might seem "Disrespectful." And I'm sorry for that.

Most of it has to do with.. Stepping into a new community. And at the same time being scared of fully admitting I'm into these woman..

I dont think people like you are the issue here....if you are new to the site or new to the liking of or exploring of trans-women you may on occasion make some mistakes but you are here to learn and be educated and to learn from your mistakes. I too on occasion have to think about what I am writing to not accidentally offend anyone.(as I am new to this world and excited to be here) I think this post is more directed to people knowing that what they are posting is disrespectful and doing it anyway


MY 2 cents.

[smc]

Originally Posted by IronCity

I think this post is more directed to people knowing that what they are posting is disrespectful and doing it anyway.

We have certainly had our share of those kinds of posts. Even worse, perhaps, are the ones that may not be consciously disrespectful, but when the disrespect is pointed out the member becomes belligerent. Those are the days that make me wonder what I was thinking when I agreed to be a moderator!

[d332_dot_com]

I myself have used "genetic girl" to differentiate from tgirls. Usually this is used in a context of meditating on some trans community issues.

I do notice many transgirls appending T- CD- TV- to their avatar and handles online. I think this is purely to forewarn other guys of who they are....after having heard so many stories of men who get bent out of shape once they find out what's behind the curtains.

If it was up to me, I would do away with "trans-" and "transgender" altogether. Plain vanilla "girl" is simplicity personified.

As for how insulted guys would feel if someone called them a "she" or a "her" well, in the gay culture, it's quite common to call each other b*tches, girls, and whatnot. And in the mainstream culture, I am increasing seeing girls called each other "guys" and even "dudes." Even a man's man (raised eyebrows) are getting so high maintenance and sensitive these days, I'm shocked nobody has started to call them girls.

I know it's one of those asymmetrical things where girls have more freedom than guys. But I believe language shapes reality and perception. The more people use the standard pronouns interchangeably, (hopefully) there will come a day when people begin to realize that gender is dynamic. Not something written in stone and permanent.

[franalexes]

Originally Posted by d332_dot_com

As for how insulted guys would feel if someone called them a "she" or a "her" well, in the gay culture, it's quite common to call each other b*tches, girls, and whatnot. And in the mainstream culture, I am increasing seeing girls called each other "guys" and even "dudes." Even a man's man (raised eyebrows) are getting so high maintenance and sensitive these days, I'm shocked nobody has started to call them girls.

:

I wonder if we should start a thread to discuss wether Ila, SMC, shadows or even SSL are "real guys".
Don't worry about my idea. I've had my butt kicked before.

[Mel Asher]

I am a little disquieted by some of the views expressed in this thread. I count myself as one perhaps of many who have grown to love and respect Transgenders and Transgenderism, and who must, on more than one occasion, in my clumsy attempts to express enthusiasm, or an honest opinion, caused offence by using terms which a number of members might take offence at; offence where innocently none is intended. Often the quickness to take offence is linked to the unhappy personal life experiences of the person offended.

This is a forum for frank and open discussion. Let's be just a little bit careful about loping an Orwellian mentality towards those less informed than oneself.
Education, especially on other peoples' sensitivies, takes time, so beware of becoming ' holier than thou '.

and share

[ila]

Before anyone takes offence at this thread I would like to say that it was not directed at any individual. I started this thread after corresponding with a couple of the ladies on this site and listening to their concerns. At the time there were a lot of disparaging remarks about transwomen.

This thread has nothing to do with being PC nor having a holier than thou attitude. Rather the purpose is to encourage members to be respectful to the ladies that we care about.