Interest in trans lifestyle waxing and waning

[Bionca]

Originally Posted by valentinetabitha

There isn't any particular reason lately, just poor timing. She's always sick or on her period or having a long week at work and is exhausted or excuse after excuse. I've been patient for a while, but I'm reaching my wit's end. I've all but given up making moves because I don't want to get angry if I'm shut down.

I have no interest in making the transition as I thoroughly enjoy my male life. I just like to take a dip in the female pool every once in a while, more so lately given the circumstances.

OK -

So it doesn't sound as "critical" as I first thought, which is probably a good thing.

Speaking as a woman, if I'm stressed or feeling anxious the last thing I'm feeling is sexy - and I have to feel sexy in order to want to have sex. Also, feeling like I'm obligated to have sex guarantees that I won't *like* having sex - no matter how good it is.

So, your wife is feeling ill and/or stressed. Offer her a foot massage maybe? It is relaxing and the bottoms of the feet are highly sensitive and can be very arousing. You could approach it in a way that isn't obviously sexual - like "Honey you look tired. Like a foot rub?"

That doesn't really address the dressing part and the desire you expressed with coming out to your wife. That's an aspect of this I'm really not qualified to talk about since that's a challenge I've never had.

[valentinetabitha]

Someone made an excellent point in a PM, but it got me thinking so I figured I'd throw the question out here as well: how exactly do you define a fetish? I've always seen a fetish as something that heightens a sexual experience, not entirely defines it.

For example, I consider myself bisexual. While I'd vastly prefer to be dressed up/made up as girl during a sexual encounter with a male, it isn't necessary. In the rigth situation, I'll just get down and, pardon the expression, take it like a man.

There are times where I'd love to be able to be out in public, have fun as Tabitha that didn't involve sex, but I just don't have that luxury. Perhaps thats why I focus so much on the sexual aspect of that side of me, I'm not sure. Does that make it a fetish, I don't know. What do you (in the general sense) think?