UK guys?

[Enoch Root]

Wow. Just wow. I was actually looking for some Brit on this forum to make a joke or two but damn. This all makes me think about the US; granted, I myself was not aware that women could get pregnant during their periods, not that I believed the contrary. Still, ignorance...

[smc]

Originally Posted by Enoch Root

Wow. Just wow. I was actually looking for some Brit on this forum to make a joke or two but damn. This all makes me think about the US; granted, I myself was not aware that women could get pregnant during their periods, not that I believed the contrary. Still, ignorance...

Oh, you wanted humor?

A friend of mine told me these two jokes about a certain part of the "limey" world. Can you tell he harbors some ill feelings against those in his home region?

What happens to an Essex girl's arsehole after sex?
He get's sent out for pizza.

How does an Essex girl turn the light on after sex?
She open's the car door.

Originally Posted by smc

Oh, you wanted humor?

A friend of mine told me these two jokes about a certain part of the "limey" world. Can you tell he harbors some ill feelings against those in his home region?

Ah yes, the Essex Girl jokes - very popular over here about 20 years ago, here's a couple more:

What does an Essex girl put behind her ears to make her more attractive?
Her ankles.

What's the difference between a Essex girl and an ironing board?
Sometimes you have trouble getting the legs apart on an ironing board.

Not exactly politically correct these days I guess

[smc]

Originally Posted by Natalie_J

Ah yes, the Essex Girl jokes - very popular over here about 20 years ago, here's a couple more:

What does an Essex girl put behind her ears to make her more attractive?
Her ankles.

What's the difference between a Essex girl and an ironing board?
Sometimes you have trouble getting the legs apart on an ironing board.

Not exactly politically correct these days I guess

Who gives a crap about political correctness when there's such a motherlode of richness to mine?!

What's an Essex girl's favorite wine?
"Aw go on. Take me to Lakeside. Please! Please! Go on, take me!

What's an Essex girl's form of protection?
A bus shelter.

[smc]

Originally Posted by smc

Who gives a crap about political correctness when there's such a motherlode of richness to mine?!

What's an Essex girl's favorite wine?
"Aw go on. Take me to Lakeside. Please! Please! Go on, take me!

What's an Essex girl's form of protection?
A bus shelter.

I forgot my all-time favorite:

What's the difference between an Essex girl and an Essex boy?
An Essex girl has a higher sperm count.

Well, OK then...

What is the difference between a walrus and an Essex girl?
One is wet, has a moustache and smells of fish - the other is a walrus.

What's the difference between an Essex girl and a Rolls Royce?
Not everyone has been in a Rolls Royce.

[smc]

Originally Posted by Natalie_J

Well, OK then...

What is the difference between a walrus and an Essex girl?
One is wet, has a moustache and smells of fish - the other is a walrus.

What's the difference between an Essex girl and a Rolls Royce?
Not everyone has been in a Rolls Royce.

You do realize that most of these jokes have an American version in the "blonde joke" genre, right?

What does an Essex girl say after sex?
"Do you really all play for the same football team?"

Why do Essex Girls wear knickers?
To keep their ankles warm.

What's the difference between an Essex girl and a washing machine?
A washing machine doesn't follow you around for weeks after you've dumped your load in it.

Okay, I'm "spent" ... and it's time to go eat dinner.