Early Experiences - What turned you on?

[a9127]

Sex Sells... At Christmas?

Segrams scores again. Think she might be my friend from the "tennis" ad earlier. I'd spend Christmas with her.

From 1946. Sex sells... "roller bearings"? Kinda looks like some sort of "cock ring" to me.

She's saying "A fucking vacuum cleaner! He got me a fucking vacuum cleaner." Now she'll wait 'till he's asleep then hook it up to his dick.

Look at Santa drooling... He knows she's been a naughty girl. Younger members: That's a phone she's using, not some sort of hair dryer.

Sorry sweetie, this Santa is into "autoerotic asphyxiation." He was watching you as you slept... and slipped. He's still alive. Better cut him down.

Naughty Santa. Ask me if I love my work? Actually that's "Mrs. Claus." Or else Santa will be a dead man.

[a9127]

So my latest “future wife” is… Forty years older than me??? As many of you know I workout in the middle of the night at a gym just down the street. I like it because I get the place to myself and I’m kind of a “night person” anyway. They have several flat screen TV’s that play CNN, ESPN, old TV shows, and “infomercials” constantly. Usually don’t pay any attention.

But last night there was some kind of “Western” on (Unless it’s Clint Eastwood, I typically don’t watch “cowboy” stuff. I’m definitely a “City Boy” anyway. ). Looked like it was from the 50’s or 60’s. Didn’t really care about it except that there was the most totally gorgeous girl. Unlike many actresses of the period, she had a very modern look and I thought she was beautiful. She was wearing a flannel shirt and jeans. Old Levi’s maybe? Definitely Love at first sight.

Very surprised I didn’t know who she was. Thought of all my “retro” favorites and couldn’t come up with a match. Finally they mentioned her character’s name: Maybelle. That was all I needed. Did a search on my phone and discovered it was “The Big Valley” Christmas episode from 1965. The actress’s name was Lynn Loring.

Research was required. Today I learned Lynn had starred on one of the earliest “soap operas” at 7, graduated from high school in 1961, played Efrem Zimbalist Jr.’s daughter on “The FBI” (I have heard of this series), appeared in numerous TV shows and movies (including “The Man From U.N.C.L.E.” and “Journey to the Far Side of the Sun”), and later became a producer, eventually becoming president of MGM/UA Television Productions in the 1980’s.

[a9127]

It’s good to be “007.” In what other movies does the hero get to sleep with so many different women?

There’s been a James Bond film festival on today. Not getting much work done. Just got done watching “Goldfinger” (1964). Bond’s main “love interest” was the infamous “Pussy Galore” (Honor Blackman ) but perhaps the most iconic image from the movie was Shirley Eaton as the girl who is killed by gold paint.

Shirley was born in 1937, in Edgware, Middlesex, England. She is still alive and was featured on the cover of “Life” magazine right after the movie was released. She is without a doubt my favorite of the “Bond Girls.”

(Have never made love to a woman covered in gold paint. Tried to talk my wife into doing this. She went out to our garage and came back with a can of gold spray paint. Shit. That stuff is really hard to get off… Especially from my hair. )

[a9127]

Not really “retro.” It’s from 2011. But damn. I finally know what I’m gonna do when I retire. BTW Mrs. Claus looks pissed.

Me in Kindergarten. I’m saying “Fuck yeah! An awesome Santa! I want an ’87 Buick Grand National GNX, a Compaq 386 Deskpro, a .357 Magnum, a case of Jack Daniels, and a subscription to Playboy. Miss Williams, what would you like for Christmas, baby?” The teacher is saying “Andy! Get your hand off my knee. Now.”

Not sexual, but a very cool idea. The beginning of “the 60’s.” Wish I’d thought of a “tech tree” for my office.

From 1928. “Peeping Tom” Santa gets his ass busted.

I’d spend Christmas with Karen. Very pretty. From 1953. Wondered if she was a movie star of the time?

Allegedly one of the “worst movies ever made.” Anyone ever see it?

[a9127]

From Russia With Love.

[a9127]

The 80’s… What do you remember of it? Reagan? Cocaine? MTV? Heavy Metal? Pac-Man? The Terminator? Aerobics? Spandex? Leg Warmers?

Well the last three are back!!! This is Anjelica Scannura who hosts a show called “22 Minute Workout” on OneTV.

According to the article, Scannura, who also hosts Anjelica’s Dance Workout, has always made fitness a priority. She started dancing professionally at age five, took Irish dancing for years and is part of her family’s flamenco dance ensemble — her mom even appears on her new show. She also won the Belly Dancer of the Universe competition in 2013.

“I wanted to make it modernized and more inclusive of people of all kinds. Those ’80s fitness shows only had one kind of person. And while I really admired the esthetic of that era, the update was much called for.”

“Recently I got injured,” she says. “OK, my injuries started when I was 18 years old, but when you’re that age, you think you’re invincible. Then all of a sudden you’re frickin’ 28 years old and you can’t get up in the morning without everything cracking.” (Me: Just wait a few more years… )

“Throughout the show you see that I’m not living off of green smoothies all friggin’ day. Sometimes I have a bad night, I drink a beer, I have five A&W hamburgers. What are you going to do?”

Sounds like a date.

[a9127]

Friday is Valentine's Day!

Here's a few "hate" Valentines from long ago. Didn't know people back then could be so nasty. Telling someone to "hang yourself." Tsk...

I like the "lemon" one. From 1900 supposedly. My "favorite" however is the "Jackass" one. Of course it is.