Question for tladies

[bigboy4012]

Again I am only guessing here, but I would say the aim is the be a woman and enjoy your sex life. if you happen to be a woman with a penis, then I don't see what would be wrong with using it for it's intended use. Using it doesn't mean you are not a woman, just a woman with a penis, so what?

Apologies for slightly hijacking the thread to have a go at SMC. :P

[GRH]

This has been addressed in other threads, but I don't mind answering it again. The answer ranges the full spectrum of sexuality and also depends a great degree on the dysphoria of the transgendered person in question.

1. You have some trans that don't mind using their penis, and a variety of trans are non-operative for any number of reasons and have no plans to ever get rid of their penis. I don't know what the stats are on operative versus non-operative transsexuals, but I think the porn industry leads many to the mistaken assumption that most trans are in this "woman with a penis camp."

2. You have trans for whom the "woman with a penis" meme will NEVER be reconciled in their own mind. As much as they feel to have been born in the wrong sex, so too do their wrong genitals remind them of this painful reality. Using their penis in the traditional, masculine way that men use their penises creates a disconnect for them that overrides any sexual pleasure.

3. You have people that fall between the two ends of the spectrum. They may be more comfortable with their penis than people in camp #2, but perhaps not as adventurous as some of the porn stars that you'd see in camp #1.

Personally, I find myself falling more toward camp #2. It's sort of complex, in that I have never necessarily identified with the "born in the wrong body" analogy that seems so popular in describing the trans community. I don't even know if it'd be fair to say I "dislike" my penis. But I HATE using it for anything that I perceive to be masculine sex. I have always abhorred traditional, heterosexual sex-- it just feels wrong thrusting my butt in and out, fucking like some manly animal. That type of sex always made me feel dirty (and not in a good way). So it doesn't matter if we're talking about a man or woman-- I do NOT want to be penetrator in the relationship. But I guess I'm a bit of an oddball too, because a "fulfilling sex life" is about the lowest priority I could imagine in a relationship. I really have so many sexual hangups, that for the most part sex seems like a lot more trouble to me than it's worth.

[Dearka]

GRH, thanks for the thoughtful post. It just seems to me that most sites involving tgirls are more for purely sexualizing them rather than a meaningful relationship. If my encounter has taught me anything it is that I can have a much better connection while still having a physical attraction although...since I have never been with one sexually I do not know how I would react.

[GRH]

Your interaction is what the REAL trans community is all about. I don't mean to imply that the sex industry version of trans isn't "real," but it is a very small subset of the larger transgendered population. Of course a lot of transwomen end up working in porn to support themselves and/or pay for operations. But this small sub-segment of the populations has a disproportionate impact on how the trans community is viewed-- as you said, largely as sexualized entities.

In reality, many trans are not the sex objects that the porn industry would have you believe. For all you know, you may have met and interacted (and even been attracted to!) trans people before without even knowing they were trans.

It is sort of a catch-22 in my mind. If it is advertised to be about trans, you can almost guarantee that the emphasis is on sexualizing as opposed to relationship building. The expectation that goes along with any of the sexualized words like "shemales" or "chicks with dicks" is that you'll see transwomen engaged in sexual encounters. For many trans, they have NO interest in advertising the fact that they are transsexual. Thus if your goal is to "find a transsexual," you wouldn't necessarily know to check with these people. They just sort of blend into society (as best they can), and if they can get involved in a long term relationship (a difficult thing for many of them), their transexuality may very well be a deal-breaker.

[franalexes]

men do not understand women.
women do not understand men.
T-gurls don't understand them selves sometimes.
Why go there?


Thanks GRH. Right now I can't add anything meaningful to what you wrote.