What sort of relationship do you want with a ladyboy? - Your Votes!!!

[besorted]

I'm head over (high) heels in love with a wonderful Philippines LB, recently back from visiting her, I'm married, scared to ask for a divorce but know i can't live without my beautiful pinay. Help! Has anyone successfully got there asian girl friend to the UK, if so please share how you managed it!

[angela671]

I'm one of those "jaded" girls. When you constantly get stared or leered at all day, molested by sexist co-workers, hit on by immature "boys" at your fav afterwork bar or groped on your way to the bathroom, have dates fall apart on you, pestered on fb for "add-mes", have to deal with penis pics as a FIRST MSG by new guys (btw wth is up with that? if i had a dick that was shrinkly, short, warty, hairy, bent, had acne, covered in yellow or green goo, looking black and diseased, had tattoos of chewie on it or just plain freaky, i'd seriously consider another way of getting a girls attention. Even being built like a porn star only gets a quick comment before being deleted and unfriended!). Be original, actually care about the girl HERSELF and be a gentleman. TRUST ME, you'll stand out from the other 99% of the guys. Bianca is right, continually wading through the filth doesnt make it easy to find a serious relationship. Having a guy wade though all that muck, deal comfortably with the tg issues and steal her heart is rare to find (I would so treat THAT MAN like a king!). And I do feel bad for the "real guys". It's overwhelmingly stacked against you. Don't give up though. If you are genuine, your girl is waiting somewhere out there for you!!

Yeah, I would like something serious. Most girls would as well i think.

[smc]

Originally Posted by angela671

I'm one of those "jaded" girls. When you constantly get stared or leered at all day, molested by sexist co-workers, hit on by immature "boys" at your fav afterwork bar or groped on your way to the bathroom, have dates fall apart on you, pestered on fb for "add-mes", have to deal with penis pics as a FIRST MSG by new guys (btw wth is up with that? if i had a dick that was shrinkly, short, warty, hairy, bent, had acne, covered in yellow or green goo, looking black and diseased, had tattoos of chewie on it or just plain freaky, i'd seriously consider another way of getting a girls attention. Even being built like a porn star only gets a quick comment before being deleted and unfriended!). Be original, actually care about the girl HERSELF and be a gentleman. TRUST ME, you'll stand out from the other 99% of the guys. Bianca is right, continually wading through the filth doesnt make it easy to find a serious relationship. Having a guy wade though all that muck, deal comfortably with the tg issues and steal her heart is rare to find (I would so treat THAT MAN like a king!). And I do feel bad for the "real guys". It's overwhelmingly stacked against you. Don't give up though. If you are genuine, your girl is waiting somewhere out there for you!!

Yeah, I would like something serious. Most girls would as well i think.

Wow, what truth: the way it's stacked against the real guys, because of the behavior of all the assholes who think only with their dicks.

It's enough to make one wish he wasn't a man!

[mabedzaqueen]

Originally Posted by angela671

And I do feel bad for the "real guys". I would like something serious. Most girls would as well i think.

Hi Angela and welcome to the forum! After having carefully read your interesting post, i can only conclude that if someone gave you the opportunity to jump in a spaceship and fly the hell out of this gross, filthy, obnoxious world, you'd do it in a heartbeat, no??

Normally, i try to avoid giving gratuitous advice 'cause it makes me feel like an old fart, but when i see people getting disappointed when they notice that the world they live in is not up to their standards, it just screams to me they haven't (yet) understood that ?reality? and ?perfection? will never walk hand-in-hand Look Angela, as i read your post i could almost smell your frustration and (believe it or not) i see your point: over the years i have met quite a few perfectionists and i didn't get a happy-person "vibe" from any of 'em... Lots of people have tried to make this world a better place and how many have succeeded?

Afterthought: you know what? I'm ready to bet even those you label as "real guys" do have some sort of black cloud following them (from a distance so you may not see it on the first few dates).

______
Dennis.

[angela671]

lolol I didn't realize I was giving the impression i wanted perfect. Everyone has baggage and I can deal with that. No one is perfect. And frankly I don't want perfect. I'd settle for just being happy.

I think you missed the point though.
My "reality" as you put it, goes something like this: Guy1 hey baby, youve got sweet lips, i'd love to put.... Guy2 Your gorgeous, you wanna get out of here and f***? Guy3 Hey, i knew you from before as a guy, since you changed you must get f***ed alot. Guy4 Thats a cute ass, I'd love to f*** it! Guy5 (co-worker) I've had fantasies bout a girl like you..you wanna f*** after work? but dont tell my wife. Guy6 Your a tranny right? You wanna fwb? Guy7 Gawd i would so do your ass. C'mon i'll make it worth your while.(money) Guy8 blahblahf**kblah
I could go on and on and on. After awhile, you overload and simply get jaded. You blank, but you smile and move on.And that's just what i call the "little boys"!
And then there are the "straight" guys you date, who want a tgirlfriend but are afraid of being seen in public with one. You don't meet their friends, coworkers or family. He takes you to late night movies, picnics at secluded beaches, long drives to nowhere or grocery shopping but you have to stay in the car. You never go anywhere together that might be "too public". You end up feeling like a 2nd class girlfriend.

I'm grounded and as down to earth as you can possibly get. I don't expect perfect. And I certainly don't expect a knight in shining armor to scoop me up and save me. But it would be nice to be seen as more than a sex object. To know that i mean more than that to someone. To be with one, who doesn't care if others see if we hold hands. And isn't afraid of what others might think. Maybe i'm asking for too much..maybe that's perfection? If it is, then i guess, beam me up.

now if oyu dont mind, i have a box of tissues calling me again...

[smc]

Originally Posted by angela671

... But it would be nice to be seen as more than a sex object. To know that i mean more than that to someone. To be with one, who doesn't care if others see if we hold hands. And isn't afraid of what others might think. Maybe i'm asking for too much..maybe that's perfection? If it is, then i guess, beam me up. ...

Don't despair completely. There really are guys out there who are decent. I look at a lot of porn in large part to "get out of my system" the shit you describe above. And I don't see escorts. The transwomen with whom I've had relationships are a graduate student I met in a non-bar, non-sex situation and who I spent a long time having mostly "academic"-related discussions with before even kissing, a woman I met on the local subway and had a discussion with when the train broke down (later going out for coffee three times before even holding hands), and a friend who I invited to Boston as a getaway from some family problems, made not a single "move" on, and who -- after a few days -- fell asleep in my arms after a long discussion about life's toils and troubles and then woke up to kiss me and make love (something she said she'd never done before).

I mention this only to show that there are decent guys. I've met others. True, most men are dogs and they think primarily with their dicks, but some manage to overcome that ... even if only fleetingly.

[angela671]

oh and top of all that..she still has to deal with her own tg issues as well.
Spending way more time shopping than a gg would. (Because nothing fits!) Spending more money than a gg would..seamstress, hormones, counselor, doctor, voice training, ffs etc. Trying to find a job. Trying to find a job with insurance that'll cover you. Keeping your job. Being hassled by cops because your sex on id doesn't match how you present. Coming out issues. Losing friends. Losing family. and on and on and on. Self doubt. Questioning whether dealing with all that, is really worth it.

So yeah, your tgirl already has alot on her mind BEFORE you even approach her. Tending to jackasses is NOT the highlight of her day.

I'm actually starting to get a little steamed here. You can keep your "gratuitous advice". I have enough on my plate, thank you!

[a9127]

I guess I might be one of the “good guys.” I don’t know. You’ll have to ask around and read some of my older posts and decide for yourself. I left because of my dissatisfaction with the number of insulting, ignorant (often ungendering), and just plain stupid posts that were tolerated (newcomers responding to 5 year old threads without checking for example). And the number of people who fall for “merelypink” never ceases to amaze me. Until my account was closed I had over 1000 posts as “aw9725.” Tried to come back and found I couldn’t “re activate” my account so here I am under a different name.

My desire when I joined TLB way back in 2009 was originally to learn more and also meet a transwoman for a long term relationship and marriage. I am active in the LGBT community and have many gay and lesbian friends. Over the years I have developed friendships with both M2F and F2M transsexuals but have never been in a relationship. I consider myself “straight” but as you know human sexuality is so much more complicated than that. I related a story here about a possible “missed opportunity” from when I was in college. I’m sure you can find it if you are interested.

Somewhere along the way I met a very beautiful and wonderful ciswoman who shares my interest in LGBT issues and we were married in March 2011. I have remained active here on and off primarily due to friends like ila, smc, Fran, Bionca, Dauls, shadows (where did he go anyway?), the conquistador, and many others.

To anyone who is new here and looking for friends, here’s hoping you will stay.

[smc]

Originally Posted by angela671

... I'm actually starting to get a little steamed here. You can keep your "gratuitous advice". I have enough on my plate, thank you!

It would appear that angela671 and I were posting at the same time, so I wanted to make sure that the "gratuitous advice" to which she is responding is actually above my post, which is immediately above hers.