When trans-women complain about being sexualized...

[smc]

Nothing keeps me "closeted." I share my attraction to transwomen openly, but I do not share it thoughtlessly -- by which I mean in circumstances when any discussion of sexual orientation is simply irrelevant or unimportant (e.g., standing in front of a classroom of students discussing syntactic structures of a language doesn't call for a such sharing of information). If the topic comes up, I do not flinch; I say what I find attractive and, if the conversation continues, I say why.

Over the course of many years, I have had the knowing many transpeople. Some of these acquaintances have become friendships, completely devoid of any sexual content. At my university, years ago, I was one of the people instrumental in securing the most progressive (at the time) set of rules of conduct protecting students and others from gender-oriented harassment and discrimination. To this day, some of the transpeople involved in that struggle have remained close friends.

Besides sexual flings, I have had genuine relationships with two transwomen. One of them lasted for a few years, but things completely unrelated to the fact that one person in the relationship is trans intervened to bring it to a close ... with good feelings toward each other still.

[hankhavelock]

Hmmm... well... closeted I have never been and never will be. To me it's an honour.

I've had almost nothing but trans-women as lovers for the past eight years and among my deepest friends - and I ain't going anywhere.

So to me it's been a blessing - I'm a gynemimetophile and proud to express that.

And I guess that's my point... let us as trans-oriented men be who we are and stand side by side with our women. They do all the tuff work and we just have to follow suit and not chicken out when they need us.

Loyalty is here enormously important.

And what do I mean by that?

I mean stand by her! Don't take the lb-69 route and talk of the "walk of shame". Be SO proud of her and show your pride publicly.

I do all the time - and I do it so forcefully that very few have the guts to go up against me - even if they consider me a freak.

In the end, she is fighting the main battle, so at least stand by her with your complete support and loyalty.

As I wrote on another forum:

The most wonderful and admirable aspect of transsexuality is that it comes from an understanding of one self - in spite of every one else. A true understanding.

Nobody but trans-women have such a healthy and sure definition of their gender-self. And I postulate that such an early understanding of gender also leads to easier adaptation and understanding of other more mundane understandings - and, indeed, even more complicated ones.

Trans-women realize their true being and fight the fight from a much earlier age - long before us cisgenders even begin to think...

A non-verified study suggests that trans-people generally have a higher IQ than average... I believe it!

My point is that this hetero-cisgender world has to start looking into the fact that oppressing trans-people is not only in the dis-interest of trans-people but certainly an unintelligent decision to leave the most likely highest intelligents out of the scientific race.

So... all power to the trannies (I couldn't help saying it)

That's my story and I'll stick to it!

Transsexuality is a BLESSING - let us not only respect it but cherish it totally!

[hankhavelock]

And loyalty is the issue!

[hankhavelock]

And what is loyalty then?

That is when you stand by her without any doubt - when you fight her fights, when you feel her pain and comfort her in her adversity, when you do all you can to celebrate her femininity - and above all when you plain and simply love her as the gorgeous woman she is!

And when you feel SO proud about her - and yourself!

Then - and only then - are you man enough for a real woman - and that by my logic is a trans-woman.

Peace

H