funny joke!

[randolph]

Two cowboys were sitting in a bar when one asked his friend if he had heard of the new sex position called rodeo. His friend says no, what is it?

Well you mount your wife from the back, reach around and cup her breasts with both hands.

Then say, "Boy, those are almost as nice as your sisters".

Then see if you can hold on for 8 seconds.

[Jenae LaTorque]

Many years ago when my Uncle Emory was a boy, he worked on a timber crew. After work, they often took a skinny dip in the lake to cool off. One day after their swim, while they were standing around waiting to dry off before putting on their clothes, they were surprised. A group of ladies from the Baptist Church Ladies Auxiliary had come upon them and all the guys quickly covered their privates as they run into the trees for cover. All...... except Emory who covered his face. Once they were in the woods, they all thought it was funny that he did so, and asked him why.

"Well," he said, "If I was to encounter one of these ladies in town, she wouldn't recognize me with my pants on while she is sure to recognize any of you."

But then as it turned out, one of the more adventurous ladies did recognize him later. But that is another story.....

[Jenae LaTorque]

A city cop was on his horse waiting to cross the street when little Maggie stopped beside him on her shiny new bike.
Nice bike," the cop said, "Did Santa bring it to you?" "Yep," the little girl said, "He sure did!"
The cop looked the bike over and handed the girl a $20 ticket for a safety violation, saying, "Next year tell Santa to put a reflector light on the back of it."
The young girl looked up at the cop and said, "Nice horse you got there sir, did Santa bring it to you?" "Yes, he sure did," chuckled the cop.
The little girl looked up at the cop and said, "Next year tell Santa the dick goes underneath the horse, not on top.

[johndowe]

Hi there.

Not too long ago i was walkng on a commercial street nearby to where i live and saw all those cop cars and vans in front of this restaurant, there had to be at least 20, i was sure there was a massacre and maby even some dead cops, but when i got there i saw why the cops were there; free donuts.

Based on true events.


JohnDowe.

[johndowe]

Hi there.

fsc21_darth_vader.jpg

Darth-vader1.jpg

celebrity-pictures-stewie-griffin-cruise-vader.jpg

darth-vader-annie.jpg


Yes i know, the third one is Stewie from family guy.

JohnDowe.

[ladyboyadmirer]

A little old lady, well into her eighties, slowly enters the front door of a sex shop. Obviously very unstable on her feet, she wobbles the few feet across the store to the counter.

Finally arriving at the counter and grabbing it for support, stuttering she asks the sales clerk: 'Dddoo youu hhhave ddiilldos?'

The sales clerk, politely trying not to burst out laughing, replies: 'Yes we do have dildos. Actually we carry many different models.'

The old woman then asks: 'Dddddoo yyyouu ccaarry a pppinkk onne, tttenn inchessss llong aand aabbou t twoo inchess ththiick... aaand rruns by bbaatteries?

The clerk responds, 'Yes we do'

She then asks: ' Dddoo yyoooouu kknnoooww hhhow ttoo ttturrrnnn ttthe
ssunoooffabbitch offffff??

[simmo]

Itchy bits


A female dwarf goes to a doctor complaining of an embarrassing itch in the Groin area.

The doctor looks her up and down, picks her up and stands her on his desk.

He lifts up her skirt and puts his head under.

A little perplexed, she hears snip, snip, snip, snip.

The doctor emerges from under her skirt.

'How's that?'

'Well, it's a lot better actually, but... it's still there.'

Undaunted, he dives back under her skirt.
Snip, snip, snip, snip. Out he comes.

'How's that?' he asks again more confident.

'That's wonderful! What did you do?'

'I trimmed the top of your Ugg boots.'