How important is passable/female identity?

[hankhavelock]

Originally Posted by Bionca

There needs to be a clarification I think. To guys who love/date/fuck/admire/jerk-off to Trans*Women so often "Passing" = "pretty".

Hmmm... time has passed since we discussed this. But I believe you're right, Mizzy B. It's more about pretty than "passable". I dislike the term, btw, "passable" as what?

Do I feel embarrassed if people can see that my girlfriend is a trans*woman? No, I don't - on the contrary, actually. Does SHE feel embarrassed? Probably sometimes.

So "passability" is most likely more a case of her feeling satisfied by her own femininity.

But pretty is the thing - and in this regard it is no different from any guy's attration to any girl - cis* or trans*. As I'm certain you also like a handsome man...

Let's not be hypocritical about this.

So here's the REAL question:

Personality and anything else aside, just LOOKS... would I prefer to date a pretty but not "passable" or a "passable" but not pretty trans*woman?

Well, you know my answer to that.

The whole issue is, that this damn "passability" thing distracts the point that femininity is not only a matter of feminine features. Femininity is personality and in the end these cannot really be separated.

I have several "non-passable" trans*friends (some of them strikingly gorgeous) - meaning that people know they are trans*women. Again, to many trans*women this is obviously an important aspect, so I have to respect it, but it's not the most important aspect by my current views. Her femininity comes from so deep inside. And THAT'S what I pick up on...

H