Would a TS escorting rule out romance?

[smolderingtemptress]

Originally Posted by Bionca

Man I hate when T-gals snipe other gals for being escorts. I attribute my own mainstream employment as much to luck as some pretty messed up body-image issues.

Yes, there are t-gals who are business owners, professors, doctors, lawyers, models, singers, actresses, writers, truck drivers, construction workers, any profession you can name. But.. lets be clear about some reality.

Many "succesful" Trans* were successful BEFORE their transition and were lucky enough to remail within their company. Many successful Trans* are deeply in denial about being trans* to keep their employment. Merely gaining employment is an ordeal for lots and lots of us.

That said, I HATE painting sex work as a last resort - like sex workers need pity and sympathy for the cruel world. I OWN my body, the fact I have tits and and took the risk to surgically alter my face attests to that. If I CHOOSE to pay my rent by having sex with someone it's my body and I have full agency as an adult.

Tranny sex-workers don't do shit for or against social acceptance. It's the same tires arguement used by the gays "why are the leather guys and drag queen shown on TV when there are so many normal homos". Rest the blame where it belongs - society, particularly men, who can only relate to trans*women as objects and not as people.

As far as being in a relationship with an escort, as long as she is OK with you having to go on business trips, stay late at the office, have a long commute, or what ever could be related to the arguement that she isn't spending time with her fella. Being a professional escort does not preclude one for looking for a relationship built on something other than hourly rates.

Why do you think we're looked at as sex objects? The blame goes both ways, both for men and the escorting tgirls, so don't try to pass it off when you're the one selling yourself in the first place. How can you possibly think men could consider you as a person when you're giving them a price for sex? Come on. You want your cake and eat it, too, so if you're genuinely confused as to why men aren't really interested in getting serious with you when they find out you lie on your back grabbing cash from a nightstand for a living, you have a lot more issues to go along with your body-image ones.

Having sex with other men while in a supposed "loving" relationship isn't really giving the relationship all you could give it. To think that escorting should be looked upon with less consideration as a freckle is preposterous, and any decent man worth a damn wants a woman who not only loves him but herself as well, and she can't provide either to the full extent if she's hooking.

Just because we're all part of the transsexual community does not mean we have to embrace each other for going down paths that are self-destructive. If you're not wanting pity, why have you posted about the woes of finding a real relationship? ...It's not just coincidence.

[Bionca]

Originally Posted by smolderingtemptress

Why do you think we're looked at as sex objects? The blame goes both ways, both for men and the escorting tgirls, so don't try to pass it off when you're the one selling yourself in the first place. How can you possibly think men could consider you as a person when you're giving them a price for sex? Come on. You want your cake and eat it, too, so if you're genuinely confused as to why men aren't really interested in getting serious with you when they find out you lie on your back grabbing cash from a nightstand for a living, you have a lot more issues to go along with your body-image ones.

Having sex with other men while in a supposed "loving" relationship isn't really giving the relationship all you could give it. To think that escorting should be looked upon with less consideration as a freckle is preposterous, and any decent man worth a damn wants a woman who not only loves him but herself as well, and she can't provide either to the full extent if she's hooking.

Just because we're all part of the transsexual community does not mean we have to embrace each other for going down paths that are self-destructive. If you're not wanting pity, why have you posted about the woes of finding a real relationship? ...It's not just coincidence.

How about you take about five steps back lady. Firstly, I'm not an escort. Seconly, I refuse to make an escort a handy "out" for a lack of social understanding. It's so convenient to lay that at an already marginalized group (sex workers, women of color, poor women) rather than take it where it needs to go.

Why can't a woman lover herself and escort? Why must a woman escort out of a lack of self-respect? Why should escorting preclude a relationship? Your statements are colored by quite a few assumptions. I have found that talking with people before you talk about them can be quite helpful.

The only differance between trans* sex-work and cis sex-work is the sex workers are all people see for trans*women. That isn't the fault of the trans*women.

[smolderingtemptress]

Originally Posted by Bionca

The only differance between trans* sex-work and cis sex-work is the sex workers are all people see for trans*women. That isn't the fault of the trans*women.

Uhh... yeah it is.

(The ones who escort, for clarification.)

Originally Posted by smolderingtemptress

Uhh... yeah it is.

(The ones who escort, for clarification.)

More cutting edge truth from the man behind the computer lol.


Don't you have a sermon to give?

[Bionca]

Originally Posted by smolderingtemptress

Uhh... yeah it is.

(The ones who escort, for clarification.)

You could probably stand to read some basic 3rd wave feminism. Julia Serano and Camille Paglia come to mind.

Originally Posted by Bionca

How about you take about five steps back lady. Firstly, I'm not an escort. Seconly, I refuse to make an escort a handy "out" for a lack of social understanding. It's so convenient to lay that at an already marginalized group (sex workers, women of color, poor women) rather than take it where it needs to go.

Why can't a woman lover herself and escort? Why must a woman escort out of a lack of self-respect? Why should escorting preclude a relationship? Your statements are colored by quite a few assumptions. I have found that talking with people before you talk about them can be quite helpful.

The only differance between trans* sex-work and cis sex-work is the sex workers are all people see for trans*women. That isn't the fault of the trans*women.

God bionca that is so damn good its worth re stating. Why can't a woman love herself and be an escort?

This great moralist presumes that there is something wrong with escorting when it is simply just another vocation and a well paying one at that. If he would read my story as I suggested although clearly he did not he would see that

A. I was a management professional a position few TS are able to achieve and

B. I have up on the corporate world and voluntarily chose escorting as a more viable and lucrative option.

[smolderingtemptress]

Lol. You two might want to take a few steps back yourselves and look at what you're actually saying. The absurdity behind your self-justification is astounding. You even chose to escort. Why you still ponder about your love lives is beyond me. The answer should be glaringly obvious.

[DL_NL]

For me, the fact that a TS escort is pretty likely to encounter violence -a lot more so than if she's not escorting- is a point worth considering. I wouldn't want my GF to end up in hospital.

[Bionca]

Originally Posted by DL_NL

For me, the fact that a TS escort is pretty likely to encounter violence -a lot more so than if she's not escorting- is a point worth considering. I wouldn't want my GF to end up in hospital.

Safety is an issue for all transwomen. Escorts are more vulnerable, but I wouldn't say "a lot" more.

Originally Posted by smolderingtemptress

Lol. You two might want to take a few steps back yourselves and look at what you're actually saying. The absurdity behind your self-justification is astounding. You even chose to escort. Why you still ponder about your love lives is beyond me. The answer should be glaringly obvious.

Who said my love life was in question? That's yet another presumption on your part and shows how little you know about me or the subject. You yap without facts that should be your name in native American he who yaps without facts.

You might want to get a profile and stop yapping from behind your anonymous wall.

Originally Posted by smolderingtemptress

Lol. You two might want to take a few steps back yourselves and look at what you're actually saying. The absurdity behind your self-justification is astounding. You even chose to escort. Why you still ponder about your love lives is beyond me. The answer should be glaringly obvious.

The only thing glaringly obvious is what an ass you're making of yourself.

Your paranoia has you thinking that Bionca and I are ganging up on you. Bionca and I barely know each other. Yet we instantly recognize when a comment is out of line and therein lies our unity.

You are gonna have to step off and sit down on this one, it's my thread, it's my profession, I chose it, I live it and I'll bury anyone who tries to stop or dis me. You have no idea what's behind these words. I'm smarter than you, more educated, more succesful, more artistic, more talented, better looking, younger I'm sure and have been through Hell without any permanent bruises. You are a small ghost whispering on the internet.

Now go steal a picture off the web and pretend it's you. On your way to precious 9 to 5 job, mister, lol.

[Bionca]

Originally Posted by smolderingtemptress

Lol. You two might want to take a few steps back yourselves and look at what you're actually saying. The absurdity behind your self-justification is astounding. You even chose to escort. Why you still ponder about your love lives is beyond me. The answer should be glaringly obvious.

I stepped back and looked at escorting years ago - by talking to women who did it. What justification is needed, and what justification are you seeing? Melissa *ghasp* CHOSE to escort - my goodness - and she even admits it. I know, she should have the common decency to hide from public view. Nothing worse than having to see someone *like that* in the day light /scarcasm off

So tell me about my love life? What do you think is so obvious?