funny joke!

[simmo]

A 7 year old and a 4 year old are upstairs in their bedroom.


'You know what?' says the 7 year old, 'I think it's about time
we started swearing.'


The 4 year old nods his head in approval, so the 7 year old says,
'When we go downstairs for breakfast I'm gonna swear first, then
you swear after me, ok?'


'Ok' the 4 year old, agrees with enthusiasm..
The mother walks into the kitchen and asks the 7 year old what he
wants for breakfast.


'Oh, shit mum, I don't know, I suppose I'll have some Coco Pops'
WHACK!! He flew out of his chair, tumbled across the kitchen floor,
got up, and ran upstairs crying his eyes out.


She looked at the 4 year old and asked with a stern voice,
' And what do YOU want for breakfast, young man?'


'I don't know,' he blubbers, 'but it won't be fucking Coco Pops'

[johndowe]

Hi there.

Ever forgot a good joke and it kills you that you can't remember, well that's what has been gnawing at me for the last few weeks and...

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JohnDowe.

[johndowe]

Hi there.

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This one is:

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What Seanchai wishes for.


JohnDowe.

[suebone]

What's the difference between a blonde and a rooster ?
A rooster says in the morning-cockll-doodlle-doooooo , while a blonde shouts,any-cock'll-dooooooo
sue b
(short&sweet

[suebone]

HI
my new joke;;;
Why was the blonde upset when she got her drivers license ?
Because she got a F in sex.
O by the way I have the F on my license and I'm not upset.
sue b
(short&sweet)

[randolph]

A store that sells husbands has just opened where a woman may go to choose a husband from among many men. The store is composed of 6 floors, and the men increase in positive attributes as the shopper ascends the flights.

There is, however, a catch. As you open the door to any floor you may choose a man from that floor, but if you go up a floor, you cannot go back down except to exit the building.

So a woman goes to the shopping center to find a husband.

On the first floor the sign on the door reads:

Floor 1 - These men have jobs.

The woman reads the sign and says to herself, "Well, that's better than my last boyfriend, but I wonder what's further up?" So up she goes.

The second floor sign reads:

Floor 2 - These men have jobs and love kids.

The woman remarks to herself, "That's great, but I wonder what's further up?" And up she goes again.

The third floor sign reads:

Floor 3 - These men have jobs, love kids and are extremely good looking.

"Hmmm, better" she says. "But I wonder what's upstairs?"

The fourth floor sign reads:

Floor 4 - These men have jobs, love kids, are extremely good looking and help with the housework.

"Wow!" exclaims the woman, "very tempting. BUT, there must be more further up!" And again she heads up another flight.

The fifth floor sign reads:

Floor 5 - These men have jobs, love kids, are extremely good looking, help with the housework and have a strong romantic streak.

"Oh, mercy me! But just think... what must be awaiting me further on?" So up to the sixth floor she goes.

The sixth floor sign reads:

Floor 6 - You are visitor 6,875,953,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please.

[simmo]

A young man married a beautiful woman who had previously divorced 10 husbands.. On their wedding night, she told her new husband to 'Please be gentle. I'm still a virgin'..

'What?' said the puzzled groom. 'How can that be if you've been married ten times.?'

'Well, husband #1 was a Sales Representative; he kept telling me how great it was going to be.

'Husband # 2 was in Software Services; he was never really sure how it was supposed to function; but he said he'd look into it and get back with me.

'Husband # 3 was from Field Services; he said that everything checked out diagnostically, but he just couldn't get the system up.

'Husband # 4 was in Telemarketing; even though he knew he had the order, he didn't know when he would be able to deliver.

'Husband # 5 was an Engineer, he understood the basic process but he wanted three years to research, implement, and design a new state of the-art method.

'Husband #6 was from Administration; he thought he knew how, but he wasn't sure whether it was his job or not.

'Husband # 7 was in Marketing; although he had a product, he was never sure how to position it.

'Husband # 8 was a Psychiatrist; all he did was talk about it.

'Husband # 9 was a Gynecologist; all he did was look at it.

'Husband # 10 was a Stamp Collector; all he ever did was ... God! I miss him.

' But now that I've married you, I'm so excited'.

'Wonderful', said the husband, 'but why?

'You're with the 'GOVERNMENT'. This time I KNOW I'm gonna get screwed.'

[johndowe]

Originally Posted by suebone

HI
my new joke;;;
Why was the blonde upset when she got her drivers license ?
Because she got a F in sex.
O by the way I have the F on my license and I'm not upset.
sue b
(short&sweet)

Hi there.

Good for you!


JohnDowe.

[randolph]

Subject: Halloween Costume Party.
On the night of a Halloween costume party a couple were having trouble picking suitable outfits. After a while the wife got mad and stormed out of the room.
Fifteen minutes later she came back completely naked except for a lemon between her legs. The husband looked at her for a moment and then stormed out of the room himself.
Twenty minutes passed and then he came back himself with a potato around his manhood. His wife gave him a weird look and then the husband replied, "If you're going as a sour-puss, I'm going as a dictator."