Is there a sequence of events that you believe lead to your current sexual desires

[4inch]

Yes, maybe... 2 bad marriages and alot of time on the computer to surf and check out all you beautiful gurls!!!

[kitty cox]

You know this is. Just too much I just get a chance to tell sissyneha that I was just about to post about my experience with finding out that I was growing breast buds, and she puts the story out before I can get to that part of my story when barry comes right behind sissyneha and shares about the earlier experience about Two young male friends trying to be females for each other so that they could fulfill each other's needs when I was just collecting my final thoughts on this critical point in my early childhood. I have Already been richly rewarded in the knowledge that there are shared experiences. Of people that have similar desires and needs. I want to put one more post out before I share the experience that I had that had a familiar ring to barry's story. Thank you sissyneha and barry for opening up the dialoge to now 4inch we can say we have formed a group I hope to post again to night and no body sounded off about pictures about pantied-tranny-cock

If any of you girls out there would please share with us your experience if you toke the plunge and started taking hormones and started forming beautiful little titties, would you please share with us how that felt every step of the way? It is something that at least two of us had a little of interest in. please please please!!!!!


So let me ring out the call again. please to all of you out there do you never think about why you are so different than the established norm


Please share any experience you had in your early years that took you down the path of loving or wanting to be a TGirl, Ladyboy, Pantyboy, Crossdresser, Femboy

[kitty cox]

When I was 14, this boy, just a few months younger than me was the one that cemented my desire for small breasted (just budding) TGirls. We were both going through adolescence and the Girls were making us salivate but neither of us would be fortunate enough to get anything more than a good tease out of the girls, but I also had a crush on this very feminine little blond boy, and I told him that I knew he wanted a girl just as much as I did, and I would give him a blow job, and he could just close his eyes and act, as if I was a girl doing it to Him. (Note: that's what I was secretly pretending to be) He said OK, and I went to my knees instantly, he started to unbuckle his belt, and I stopped him and said it would be more like a girl was doing it if he let me do it, so he said OK! The truth was that the former encounter with the other boy when I was eleven had me addicted to unwrapping the object of my desire, the act of unbuckling his belt, then the top button of his pants, then down came the zipper, then peeling open the unzipped fly, then a deep inhale of young, hairless, boy cock , the light sent of soap and sweat and swimming pools and that aroma that only lives in the few seconds right when you first set it free, then the first gentle kisses planted on his penis and balls through his white cotton underwear then mouthing and lightly nibbling his prick until I would hook my fingers in the elastic waistband of his underpants pull them down as his ever hard cock pointed strait at my wide open mouth, I would drop my cock hungry mouth down on his throbbing cock caressed only with my moist, fevered breath until I would close my wet soft lips on the base of his hairless balls and then begin the slow teasing slide up his hot throbbing shaft, I would repeat this over and over until eventually he release a sweat load of hot cream for my anticipated reward. We did this almost every school night and all day and night long during the long summer. I was in love with this boy, and it gave me a serious case of cock suckers fever, when all you do is think about is your forbidden desire to make love to that special someone in that special way. I pushed him for a more girlfriend like allowances, and he eventually let me suck his nipples, and I use to say to him, can I suck your pussy when I wanted to suck his cock, you see it wasn't just me that pretended to be a girl for him, he pretended to be a girl for me as well. Looking back, on what I know now, I realize that I was trying to feminize him. and he was trying to feminize me. I asked him if girls' panties turned him on. He said yes. I unbuckled my pants, unzipped my fly and showed him that I was wearing a pair of white nylon panties with cute little satin bows on the waistband. I tried, but I could not get him to put on a pair. I think he was terrified at being caught, I was to, and if anyone had found out what we were doing it would have been hell in that day. I know he wanted to try on the panties because when I would take a pair and rub them on his inner thighs and balls and sometimes put them over his cock and suck him through them. He would moan and that was different for him, because he would just sit quit as a mouse as he filled my mouth, with his sweet cream and not make a sound. Have you stood in amazement at the stamina of a teenage boy, he would spew his cream, and I would keep on going, he never softened and we would just move on to the next climax I tried to get him to spend the night, initially because I hoped I could get him under the covers with me and I could get my hands on this cock before it got hard. I imagined that it would be fun to have his soft penis grow to a full erection by my gentle caressing. Because as hard as I tried, I never could get to his cock before he was hard as a rock. I think he knew we were more like boyfriend and girlfriend and spending the night meant commitment. I know he wanted to because when we started experimenting with getting high, he would lose some of his cool male pretense and this one time, agreed to spend the night but when he called his mother to ask for permission she suspected he was drinking and told him to come right home. He was raised alone by his mother, it was a single parent family. For some reason his father wanted to get back in his life. I was shattered with the news that he would be moving to Florida to live with his father. I begged him to stay but he really did not have a choice. we wrote to each other a couple of times but his letters just made me sadder knowing I would not see him that day, that night and maybe never again. He was so smart I would take him to my school and show him off I would say you should meet my friend and tell them how fast he could read. I wonder if they could pick up in my voice that I meant my boyfriend and lover. I on the other hand did not take to school work at all back then and could barely keep a passing grade so writing for me was very difficult The few letters I did get were ended with little secret messages that he missed me, we could not say what we really felt. he called me one time, but calling on the phone was expensive back then and if you remember my family was dirt poor.
After I lost that lovely little innocent love affair I have never had a desire to have sex with man or boy again I can honestly say I have never looked at a member of my same sex, man or boy, and felt any attraction sexual or otherwise, because I was heartbroken and nothing could replace that once upon a time love of mine. I thought that for sure I would never have that need met again; I reasoned that they were the things of youth and as the next few years past I grieved the loss with horrible results. I went on a three year drinking and drugging bender. during that time I turned full time attention to girls. I did keep my desire to be feminine and to wear girls things but now I hoped to find a girl that would like dressing me up or find it stimulating to see a well dressed girlyboy but I could never even get my self to so much as bring up the subject with a girl that I was dating. This made the secret forbidden desire all the stronger. but Truthfully, how many of us will be lucky enough to have a relationship with a female that would treat this kind of thing with loving acceptance? But now I truly am looking at males, but because they do not look very much like a male except between their legs and I always want then small down there and circumcised signing off Kitty Kelly.

[megalops]

Sissy, thanks for sharing your story. Its just horrible how people treat each other when there's a slight difference in how we are.

As a youngster I was a typical boy, never abused or molested. At puberty I noticed that I attracted to some boys, small petite boys with feminine traits. One boy, who I was attracted to, told some others that he and a friend exchanged blow jobs. You can guess what happened. That kid was mocked, ridiculed and hounded. I felt sorry for him and was the only kid who was still civil to him. But I also learned I had to be very cautious about telling who I was attracted to or sexually desired. By the time I was 15 I had sex with 2 boys, both who lived in other towns and didn't go to my school. One of them was a regular. (By sex I mean blow jobs and jerking each other. No kissing, hugging or anal.) By 16 I had discovered girls and tried to put boys in the past. After all, I didn't want to be a "fag" or "queer." But the attraction was still there. In college I met other guys I was attracted to. I noticed that the ones that turned me on all had feminine traits. Round ass and hips, little body hair, full lips. Most of these guys were straight but when I was 19 I befriended Wayne, who was always acting macho and talking about pussy. I sensed he was full of it but played along. After about 2 months we finally had sex. And we did everything. We became "roommates." Outside he continued to put on his act and looked the part. Inside he was kind, gentle and had a more feminine appearance (to me anyway). To make a long story short, over the years I engaged in relationships almost exclusively with women but did have a couple of male lovers. Again, they were a certain type. Very feminine in appearance and behavior.

My job as a medical social worker brought me into contact with the transgendered community. Again, I was attracted to so many of my clients but couldn't say or do a thing for professional reasons. I have yet to have sex with a T-girl and have no interest in escorts. I like to build relationships and know the person from the inside.

So, for whatever reason, I'm attracted to females and feminine males. No one thing made me that way. Its just the way I'm wired psychosexually.

[sissyneha]

Originally Posted by megalops

Sissy, thanks for sharing your story. Its just horrible how people treat each other when there's a slight difference in how we are.

As a youngster I was a typical boy, never abused or molested. At puberty I noticed that I attracted to some boys, small petite boys with feminine traits. One boy, who I was attracted to, told some others that he and a friend exchanged blow jobs. You can guess what happened. That kid was mocked, ridiculed and hounded. I felt sorry for him and was the only kid who was still civil to him. But I also learned I had to be very cautious about telling who I was attracted to or sexually desired. By the time I was 15 I had sex with 2 boys, both who lived in other towns and didn't go to my school. One of them was a regular. (By sex I mean blow jobs and jerking each other. No kissing, hugging or anal.) By 16 I had discovered girls and tried to put boys in the past. After all, I didn't want to be a "fag" or "queer." But the attraction was still there. In college I met other guys I was attracted to. I noticed that the ones that turned me on all had feminine traits. Round ass and hips, little body hair, full lips. Most of these guys were straight but when I was 19 I befriended Wayne, who was always acting macho and talking about pussy. I sensed he was full of it but played along. After about 2 months we finally had sex. And we did everything. We became "roommates." Outside he continued to put on his act and looked the part. Inside he was kind, gentle and had a more feminine appearance (to me anyway). To make a long story short, over the years I engaged in relationships almost exclusively with women but did have a couple of male lovers. Again, they were a certain type. Very feminine in appearance and behavior.

My job as a medical social worker brought me into contact with the transgendered community. Again, I was attracted to so many of my clients but couldn't say or do a thing for professional reasons. I have yet to have sex with a T-girl and have no interest in escorts. I like to build relationships and know the person from the inside.

So, for whatever reason, I'm attracted to females and feminine males. No one thing made me that way. Its just the way I'm wired psychosexually.

thanks for sharing your experience as well.....
i agree that a one off thing can't change a person's outlook but a chain of events can....
i considered myself bisexual and somewhere between both male and female (at the very initial stages of understanding my sexuality)....but as i explored more i discovered my true being (wat i really wanted to be).....and i'm happy with the choice i made.

[barry]

Originally Posted by kitty cox

then peeling open the unzipped fly, then a deep inhale of young, hairless, boy cock , the light sent of soap and sweat and swimming pools and that aroma that only lives in the few seconds right when you first set it free, then the first gentle kisses planted on his penis and balls through his white cotton underwear then mouthing and lightly nibbling his prick until I would hook my fingers in the elastic waistband of his underpants pull them down as his ever hard cock pointed strait at my wide open mouth, I would drop my cock hungry mouth down on his throbbing cock caressed only with my moist, fevered breath until I would close my wet soft lips on the base of his hairless balls and then begin the slow teasing slide up his hot throbbing shaft, I would repeat this over and over until eventually he release a sweat load of hot cream for my anticipated reward.

your way with words is quite arousing i enjoy your thoughts very much

[kitty cox]

When I started this thread, I was unsure of the reaction but it has been a long time in the works. First you will hear me saying thank you, over and over for participating in this form. Without anyone listening there can be no healing. Many of you that have contributed have done with compaction, by identifying with me by sharing a commonality with a reveling story of your own. I was sure that by now someone would of posted a very harsh assessments of what I have reveled. Just because it has not occurred yet, will not insure that in wont. I will however enjoy the comfort of friends, for now and try to share truthfully with you, of the thoughts that your contributions have brought to mind.

I have posted before that I intended to post my story of events as they happened as I grew from child hood until my dreams and desires had pretty much been set for life. I had put my thoughts down in little notes, as I remembered them, and then assembled them in chronological order. Then to keep from putting people to sleep, I edited it down as much as I could. I originally was hoping to post the story just to get it out of me. Than sit back and brace myself for god knows what. I have been so presently surprised.

I guess I really should not be surprised that I found people like me that act, very much like me. Like I posted earlier when I would be very hesitant to revel the inward true self unless the other party revealed there comparable desires. when they did I would rush to give them safe haven in the comfort of knowing that I identified with them and shared some of the very same sexual desires I have been very tender hearted all of my life. As they used to tease president Clinton, about how he could feel your pain. I truly could feel the pain of others, because I suffered inwardly with this agonizing presentation of my self and the person that I found myself to be inwardly. Thank you for the safe haven.

The inward man was no picnic either, lets see, he loved girls, they have been and always will be the prettiest thing on the face of the earth, but in some respects they don't quite do it for him. He finds the idea of making any advancements on a male unimaginable, not that there is any thing wrong with a man, but girls are attracted to them, not other guys. But the biggest thrill he could imagine would be, to be, dating this so sexy, foxy lady only to find out that when he finally was given the privilege of making love with this, so feminine girly girl he finds that she has this little five inch circumcised eye-candy-cute, pink little cock in her tight little panties. But is not this desire what they call gay? Well yes and know...... maybe so, no it was the pretty girl that he was dating and was all hot for......but why was he so thrilled when he found that little five inch circumcised eye-candy-cute, pink little cock in her tight little panties. And if that is not enough this same person is pretending for every one else that he is a standard guy when he really would love to play at being a pretty girl and enjoy all the things that he believes would make it fun to be a girl so play and fantasy is the end result and nothing is really answered but it is the small little safe havens along the twisted road of life that he finds comfort in thank you for the zone.
I will post again as soon as I have it together, Kitty Cox

[sissyneha]

in my school (before going to boarding school)...i had a few encounters with boys where we would go to secluded areas of the school campus and fondled each others genitals and wud make each other cum....many a times i voluntarily gave many of them blow jobs.....i shared a sort of relationship with a guy..he actually proposed to me when we were just about 15 years old....and i accepeted .....we shared many intimate moments together.....we both were heartbroken when my parents got me admitted to the boarding school.