i love tgirls but i love my gf. what do i do?!?!

[deanthemachine69]

I've been with 2 tgirls and had a great time.I look at tporn religiously. My gf of 2 years knows I watch porn but no idea about tgirl stuff. I want to tell her about my obsession but I'm afraid of what he reaction will be...any thoughts or suggestions would be great!

[EdwardSinclair]

I've been in the same boat before, and it didn't end up nicely!
It all depends on the person, I suppose!
I would be very careful though, and one way you could do this is to introduce the subject slowly and only if you know she is going to be comfortable with it!

----------------------- Tips:

First you have to both be able to watch porn together comfortably.

Secondly she must be interested in finding out about what a guy gets out from anal pleasure, e.g prostate stimulation etc...

Thirdly once you have established the ground and both of you are comfortable with watching porn together, show her a clip of a guy and a tgirl and ask her what she thinks about it... get some feedback and assess if she's ok with it, and whether you can relay more information about the subject.

If you succeed it will open up a whole new world for you both during sex (strap ons/butt plugs play)!!

If you fail, this is the type of thing that could end the relationship, especially if she suffers from low self-esteem, as she may feel insecure! It all depends on how you approach her with this, and her predisposition to be open minded with this!

[deanthemachine69]

Great advice. Thanks a lot! I think I'm scared of the latter. I don't want this relationship to end.BC I like tgirls.

[EdwardSinclair]

You are welcome!!

I understand that it can be a tough one to call! I have had bad experiences in the past, right when I started joining communities, but my current partner (my wife) is way more open about these things than even I am, so I have not found a problem with her thus far! It did take some adjusting though...

So even if the person you are with doesn't accept it, later you will find one who does... because if someone loves you they must accept you the way you are!

If you settle for less your life will suck daily, because of the secrets you keep from each other, filling a huge hole or gap between you, that eventually gets so huge that you can't cross over without falling into a deep abyss, and you may end up hurting that person you love instead, because even hidden things have a way to surface in the end!

[Wendy Summers]

There's an obvious answer:

THREESOME!

[guiltydreamer]

Originally Posted by EdwardSinclair

You are welcome!!

I understand that it can be a tough one to call! I have had bad experiences in the past, right when I started joining communities, but my current partner (my wife) is way more open about these things than even I am, so I have not found a problem with her thus far! It did take some adjusting though...

So even if the person you are with doesn't accept it, later you will find one who does... because if someone loves you they must accept you the way you are!

If you settle for less your life will suck daily, because of the secrets you keep from each other, filling a huge hole or gap between you, that eventually gets so huge that you can't cross over without falling into a deep abyss, and you may end up hurting that person you love instead, because even hidden things have a way to surface in the end!

I overlooked this post previously. You are absolutely spot on with this advice. My problem has been secrecy and lack of communication and indeed I have fallen deep, deeper into the abyss. My moral compass long ago ceased to function and I have badly betrayed the person most dear to me. The sad irony is that on discussing and admitting my cheating ways and sex with transsexual partners, my wife is most destroyed by the lies, dishonesty and betrayal rather than the infidelity itself. Whilst she is shocked by my sexual behavior, she is tolerant and understanding of same sex and third sex attraction. If only I had summoned the courage and respect for her to admit to my feelings some time ago, perhaps my marriage could have been saved.

Originally Posted by guiltydreamer

I overlooked this post previously. You are absolutely spot on with this advice. My problem has been secrecy and lack of communication and indeed I have fallen deep, deeper into the abyss. My moral compass long ago ceased to function and I have badly betrayed the person most dear to me. The sad irony is that on discussing and admitting my cheating ways and sex with transsexual partners, my wife is most destroyed by the lies, dishonesty and betrayal rather than the infidelity itself. Whilst she is shocked by my sexual behavior, she is tolerant and understanding of same sex and third sex attraction. If only I had summoned the courage and respect for her to admit to my feelings some time ago, perhaps my marriage could have been saved.

Yes, it's a sad fact that not only do gbltq people have to "come out of the closet" so do a lot of guys who are straight but still find transsexual women attractive.
It's all because of the society we live in today. To many people have their minds closed off to the reality that gender isn't binary, and nor is it determined by ones genitalia.
And just because one man is only attracted to women with penises and no other variation does not make him gay or bi. It's because he's still only attracted to women.
But many people like to see in black and white. It's either one or the other. And won't accept reality as a full spectrum of colors.

I follow Harvey Milks philosophy on this matter. Everyone every where needs to come out for who they are. Even if it's just to their family and loved ones.
Once everyone knows at least one of these minorities is actually a human being with feelings just as theirs. Than that's when change will happen.

Wow... I so digressed. Sorry.
But anyways, always be honest with the ones you love. Because if they love you for who you are, than they will love everything about you. Even your flaws.
Not saying being attracted to trans girls is a flaw, but I think you get my point.

[smc]

Originally Posted by deanthemachine69

I've been with 2 tgirls and had a great time.I look at tporn religiously. My gf of 2 years knows I watch porn but no idea about tgirl stuff. I want to tell her about my obsession but I'm afraid of what he reaction will be...any thoughts or suggestions would be great!

Since you "look at tporn religiously," have you considered consulting a member of the clergy for an answer?

[deanthemachine69]

I definitely agree with the advice Edward. I think if it starts to get worse I may have to say something to her about it regardless of if we break up or not.

O and the threesome? No way lol I couldn't get her to do one e with a guy or girl so that's a no go unfortunately

Originally Posted by deanthemachine69

I definitely agree with the advice Edward. I think if it starts to get worse I may have to say something to her about it regardless of if we break up or not.

Don't wait until it gets worse, Dean ! follow Edward's advices from post #2. He's suggesting you a way to gradually introduce your girlfriend to it all. Take the time to follow these advices one by one as they're written in the post... In all probability, you will be pleasantly surprise: either she will go along with it, or she won't react as negatively as you anticipate. If you proceed gradually enough, you'll be able to reassess the situation anyways if things turns badly, as to go for broke or not.

[EdwardSinclair]

Originally Posted by danthepoetman

Don't wait until it gets worse, Dean ! follow Edward's advices from post #2. He's suggesting you a way to gradually introduce your girlfriend to it all. Take the time to follow these advices one by one as they're written in the post... In all probability, you will be pleasantly surprise: either she will go along with it, or she won't react as negatively as you anticipate. If you proceed gradually enough, you'll be able to reassess the situation anyways if things turns badly, as to go for broke or not.

That's exactly what I was hinting at!!

These in my opinion were excellent advices, Edward. I would not have been able to present them so… I don’t know, methodically and clearly. The most important is always communication. When you share with your partner and communicate, I find that generally, you succeed in relating, which in the end is what a relationship is about. You just try to open up the best you can and expect reciprocity. You make out of your loved one your best friend, as much as you can.
I commend you on your post and hope Dean can take advantage.

[smooth]

Originally Posted by deanthemachine69

I've been with 2 tgirls and had a great time.I look at tporn religiously. My gf of 2 years knows I watch porn but no idea about tgirl stuff. I want to tell her about my obsession but I'm afraid of what he reaction will be...any thoughts or suggestions would be great!

yea i have a suggestion keep your mouth shut...who knows she may be fine with it....but its all the other ways it may go that is risky. and always have that ace in the hole (what if you break up one day and she decides to spread your little secret around) cover all the bases man

Originally Posted by smooth

yea i have a suggestion keep your mouth shut...who knows she may be fine with it....but its all the other ways it may go that is risky. and always have that ace in the hole (what if you break up one day and she decides to spread your little secret around) cover all the bases man

Who cares if she spreads his "little secret" around. Is it shameful to be attracted to trans women? NO it is not.
So be a fucking man and own up to your own sexuality. If I can do it, you sure as hell can.

[smooth]

you are not from a little country town are you?? i think you may be looking at this standing in different shoes than me..i respect your opinion..but it sounds like he is closer to being in my shoes than yours. some women would have no problem with it...you dont mix love and sexual fantasy. where im from your sexual fantasies is better left in your head

Originally Posted by smooth

you are not from a little country town are you?? i think you may be looking at this standing in different shoes than me..i respect your opinion..but it sounds like he is closer to being in my shoes than yours. some women would have no problem with it...you dont mix love and sexual fantasy. where im from your sexual fantasies is better left in your head

Sounds like you need to move the fuck away from where you're from. Cause being that closed off to yourself is not healthy. I should know.

Originally Posted by smooth

yea i have a suggestion keep your mouth shut...who knows she may be fine with it....but its all the other ways it may go that is risky. and always have that ace in the hole (what if you break up one day and she decides to spread your little secret around) cover all the bases man

Of course, we all make choices as what we want others to know of ourselves. And it might be difficult in a small town indeed. But just as a matter of reflection, isn’t it the problem we all have in society, not to be able to discuss openly who we are and what our desires are made of? I find it’s the root of the problem. We should all be more open, we should be able to discuss around us, and especially with people we know, of such subjects as sexuality and sense of self. It is by not communicating that we perpetuate intolerance and lack of understanding. If only that “silent majority” could be a bit more truthful and vocal, things would really change. But unfortunately, we endlessly choose the easy, quiet, undisturbed route of the status quo. Talking, exchanging, teaching are the only way we’re going to get anywhere if we find within ourselves the strength to do it. And I must admit that at times, considering what we see around, it doesn’t raise too much optimism…

Now if someone reveal to his/her loved one secrets of intimate life and that person goes around and betray that trust, it’s not difficult to figure who really has problems. It might also show the fact that such revelations didn’t follow the proper form. You have to respect people’s sense of propriety too; some revelations need to take a gradual, explanatory form to be understood and accepted with some people. Everyone has to use some tact in relations to others. But with such precautions, it is possible, or at the very least it should be, unless you’re facing psychotic maniacs, which does indeed happens…

[pigsnizzle]

If she accepts that you look at porn, there shouldn't be a limit on what type of porn. Porn in general can be very addictive and distort our minds to be attracted to a certain "type" of male, female, etc. Most girls don't look like porn stars (most porn stars don't look like porn stars without all the make up and camera affects). this is why many women are insecure about letting their guy look at porn, because the feel they cannot measure up to that kind of beauty or sexiness. In this case, you GF cannot measure up cuz she doesn't have a yard stick LOL! She has to accept your hobby of wackin off to tranny porn or go get another guy.

[TheExplorer]

i love my wife and i love tgirls, too. i do not have a sexual experience with a tgirl but i just love to watch them. they make me excited, women make me excited, sometimes one does this, sometimes the other one, sometime both of them. i love a body has boobs with cock, i love a body has boobs with clit... so i guess what i really love is boobs

[EdwardSinclair]

Originally Posted by TheExplorer

... so i guess what i really love is boobs

Actually, that's a very good realisation! Give me any hot bod with sexy boobs, and none of the hair in fact. Those must be shaved asap!!