Waiting for my dream girl

[a9127]

“Ariel’s” older sister: “I don’t know why you are wasting your time with that little tramp, Andy. She’s too young for you. Besides I lost my tail a long time ago, baby. This ones just a fake. And wait till you see what’s between MY legs...”

[a9127]

This is Dove Cameron from the 2018 musical “Clueless” based on the 1995 movie. I remember getting my first cellphone in the Summer of 1995 about the same time the movie came out. I was 12. Dove was born in January 1996.

She’s saying: “Andy. Help!!! I don’t know how this damn thing works! Wish they’d hurry up and invent the iPhone...”

The second picture. Dove as “Mal” from Descendants 3. Take a look at what the card says. “Andy, I caught you listening to ‘Any Way You Want It’ the other day. Cool! My dad ‘Hades’ likes that band too...”

The last picture. "Dr. Andy" gets around. This is from the 60's. They're saying: "Can you help us with our Fortran programming assignment? (giggle)."

[a9127]

Today’s best “clickbait” ad gave me an idea of what my “Future Wife” will look like.

IF I live to be 1000.

She’s saying: “Sorry Andy, but you’re really just too old for me...”

(What would you tell her on a date? “You have really prett... errr... ummm... BIG eyes.”? )

[a9127]

I've decided that our date would be "awkward" at best. I don't know if I ever could get used to those eyes looking at me all the time.

“What? Did I spill something on my necktie?”

“Stop staring at my cock. It’s not that big...”

“This is the ‘3000’s’! I thought it would be OK if I brought my wives and all my sex dolls along for our date...”

(Wonder how they arrived at that is how humans would look like in the year "3000"? I mean I would think by then everyone would be at least 7' tall, stronger than The Terminator, immune from all diseases, and look like Brad Pitt or Cindy Crawford. But what do I know... )

[a9127]

This arrived in my e-mail this morning. From PC Magazine! Not exactly what I would have expected at 7:00 AM.

Didn't read the article. I mean really? What could they tell me that I don't already know?

(Moderators: I'm sure the dogs are at least "18" in people years. )

[a9127]

"Dr. Andy" can't help it. It runs in the family. This is my grandfather with his "Business COBOL Programming" class.

(Moderators: Since it is a "Business School" I assume it's a college and not a high school so over "18." Probably a "community college" - 2 year.)

[a9127]

Most “visits to Santa” this year will be “socially distanced.”

But not for me. As you can see this Santa and his two helpers will be having a celebration of their own.

The one on the left is 6’3” and the one on the right is 6’2”.

They’re saying: “Wait ‘till you see what we’ve got for YOU, baby.”