Waiting for my dream girl

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Today’s favorite “fake ad” is brought to you by MSNBC. The caption was something like “12 Ways to Make Money at Home.” Does anybody else think the same thing as I did?

Or do I just have a “dirty mind”?

(No, I think I was right. Looked up my “future wife”… Found the picture under “Shutterstock” images. The filename was very long but had “sexual-licking-tongue” in there. See for yourself! Update: I'm right. She's also under Adobe images. Here's the complete gallery. After looking through all of them I feel the least I can do is ask her out on another date... )

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Rylee again. You know I'm beginning to think those guys who married cartoon characters were onto something...

Yes. I'm married to a very beautiful, intelligent, and understanding woman in real-life but if there is another life after this one, I hope someday that I will meet someone like Rylee.

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Cassandra Cass as a very sexy Easter Bunny.

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Male sex dolls are becoming popular. Soon all men will be replaced… The doll pictured even has a “bionic penis” (A question: Exactly where do you get one of those? And how long does it take to get "fitted"? Oh, no reason… Just wondering… ).

The company says they “will come in all shapes and sizes.” Riiiight. No "four inchers" here. The smallest ones will start at 12”.

But I couldn’t help but notice he’s lost his head. Maybe that doesn’t matter really. Most of us guys “think with our dicks” anyway.

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Maryeve Dufault "Future Wife"

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Although I'm totally smitten with Maryeve above, I haven't posted in several days. Just too busy with work.

This was today's best fake ad on CNN. The caption was "Work From Home in Zionsville." I couldn't help it... I'm sure she's looking at her screen saying "He lives in Zionsville?" My profile pic is still working I guess.

(But I think Maryeve and I would make a great couple. There's the "racing thing" obviously. And we are almost exactly the same age. She's not 15 years younger than me... I bet we would have a lot in common. Of course I'd let her drive the ZR-1. Shit, she could probably run rings around me... Wonder if they'd open up the Indianapolis Motor Speedway for us? They don't have any plans to use it for a while... Sounds like an awesome first date to me. But what to do after? Everything is closed... )

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Today’s fake ad. It was supposed to be a romantic weekend getaway at our cabin in the mountains. We thought it would be sexy if she was naked…. So she didn’t bring any clothes. It was her idea actually. Once we got there we realized that we had only enough for one cup of coffee Saturday morning...

She said “Andy why don’t you go find a Starbucks that’s open?”

Before I left, I kissed her and played with her cock until it was getting hard and dripping pre-cum. Then locked her semi-erect cock in a chastity device. I’ve only been gone 6 hours. It’s not easy finding a place that’s open…