Early Experiences - What turned you on?

[a9127]

“Watson! What do you mean you ‘came quickly’?”

Baby I’ll blow out the fuse then we’ll have some real fun.

More “bad bondage.” Guess I’ll have to step in once again.

Shit. When he said he liked to cosplay as “Thor” I thought he meant Chris Hemsworth.

“Women want him. Men want to be him.” But for chrissakes get rid of the flippers.

“War Maid of Mars.” Sure, whatever you say. I’ll pick you up at 8.

[a9127]

Sex sells… Alchohol.

Actually my eyes are brown… And my name is not “Smithers.” But we were both so drunk who cared?

I see a bottle of Seagram’s, a very old can of 7UP, my mom’s tennis racket, and legs to die for.

Never heard of “Echo Spring” before but looks like fun. Gotta be early to mid 1970’s. BTW the blonde on the left is mine.

Very early Jose Cuervo tequila ad. 1950’s early 60's? The artwork is beautiful. Wonder if she is anybody famous?

Another sexy tequila ad. Wild? Suggestive? From the 70’s or even 80's maybe? But I bet you will always remember “two fingers.”

This shit’ll kill ya. I think it really has in the past. I’ve only had it once. Very potent. Also a cool green color. If you have a guest who knows how to serve it it’s even better. We did…

[a9127]

This belongs in the “retro” thread because… it’s from 1981! This is Heather Thomas of “The Fall Guy” which ran until 1985 or ‘86. I have only seen the show in repeats but elsewhere on this site I have told the story of how I got to meet her years later as a little kid. I must have been 6 or 7 at the most and went with my dad to something. I still have the autographed picture. I’m sure I was a little shit but I remember her as being really sweet and talking with me. My dad thought she was pretty awesome (of course he did). I would have liked to have had her as my babysitter. But no luck.

Anyway, I think Heather is gorgeous, one of the most beautiful women of all time, and easily ranks with any of my “current” celebrity crushes (as in the ones I “totally have it bad for”). They would include Dove Cameron, Hayley Williams, and Taylor Swift. No kidding… All of whom are younger than me. Hayley and my wife are about the same age.

My biggest "crushes" who were around before I was would include, Heather (of course), Loni Anderson, Farrah, Francoise Hardy, and Sharon Tate. Of these five, the only one younger than my mom and dad would be Heather. I know because I checked. Susan Anton (a few posts above also should be on that list). She is maybe a year younger than my mom. So would I date someone my parent's age? Fuck yes. If I wasn't married of course.

Curiously, I own this poster. I helped a friend’s mom get set up on something called “eBay” which was new at the time (showing my age now…). He was also into “retro” stuff and knew I had met her. So this poster being “rare” (the pink bikini is the “famous” one) he decided to get it for me. I have a lot of sports collectibles and keep it with that stuff. It is rolled up and in perfect condition.

(Just noticed it's signed "Jody." That's because she played stuntwoman Jody Banks on "Fall Guy." That is a very old GMC pickup--the kind with the exploding gas tank I think--this was worse than the infamous "Pinto." They had several "jump trucks" for stunts and then "show" trucks like this one.)

[a9127]

Here's three more of Heather...

"Zapped." Don't know if this was in theatres or straight to video. I do know it was before I was around. She played a cheerleader. First watched this movie at a friend's house not too long after I got to meet her. Ever wonder why I chose to play football at such a young age?

In the movie (a spoof of "Carrie") she also was voted prom queen. Like who would her competition be anyway? Moderators: She's actually 24 or 25. Wish she had gone to my high school.

From "Fall Guy." They go undercover to infiltrate a "biker gang" or something. She was also in a movie about a "high tech" (for back then) motorcycle called "Cyclone." I have seen it but not for a long time. Think it's from the late 80's or early 90's. Don't know if she really can ride. Maybe if it warms up here we could get the Harley out. I don't think my wife would mind...

[a9127]

More “retro” stuff…

Didn’t realize all my “ex’s” had moved in together when they invited me “over for coffee.”

She saved the best part of the sacrificial statue for herself.

“Weird Tales” was published almost 100 years ago. Still has a following today. Wonder why?

“Bad Bondage” strikes again. Just gotta get rid of your hopeless loser boyfriend rolling around on the floor then that creepy “snake guy thing” and we’ll have a great time.

I’ve have had more than a few dates end badly. This is the first time one ever pulled a .45 and climbed out the window.

Yes. He really IS way too old for you Dove. You should date me instead if you wanna go out with an “older guy.”

[a9127]

Sex Sells... At Christmas?

Segrams scores again. Think she might be my friend from the "tennis" ad earlier. I'd spend Christmas with her.

From 1946. Sex sells... "roller bearings"? Kinda looks like some sort of "cock ring" to me.

She's saying "A fucking vacuum cleaner! He got me a fucking vacuum cleaner." Now she'll wait 'till he's asleep then hook it up to his dick.

Look at Santa drooling... He knows she's been a naughty girl. Younger members: That's a phone she's using, not some sort of hair dryer.

Sorry sweetie, this Santa is into "autoerotic asphyxiation." He was watching you as you slept... and slipped. He's still alive. Better cut him down.

Naughty Santa. Ask me if I love my work? Actually that's "Mrs. Claus." Or else Santa will be a dead man.

[a9127]

So my latest “future wife” is… Forty years older than me??? As many of you know I workout in the middle of the night at a gym just down the street. I like it because I get the place to myself and I’m kind of a “night person” anyway. They have several flat screen TV’s that play CNN, ESPN, old TV shows, and “infomercials” constantly. Usually don’t pay any attention.

But last night there was some kind of “Western” on (Unless it’s Clint Eastwood, I typically don’t watch “cowboy” stuff. I’m definitely a “City Boy” anyway. ). Looked like it was from the 50’s or 60’s. Didn’t really care about it except that there was the most totally gorgeous girl. Unlike many actresses of the period, she had a very modern look and I thought she was beautiful. She was wearing a flannel shirt and jeans. Old Levi’s maybe? Definitely Love at first sight.

Very surprised I didn’t know who she was. Thought of all my “retro” favorites and couldn’t come up with a match. Finally they mentioned her character’s name: Maybelle. That was all I needed. Did a search on my phone and discovered it was “The Big Valley” Christmas episode from 1965. The actress’s name was Lynn Loring.

Research was required. Today I learned Lynn had starred on one of the earliest “soap operas” at 7, graduated from high school in 1961, played Efrem Zimbalist Jr.’s daughter on “The FBI” (I have heard of this series), appeared in numerous TV shows and movies (including “The Man From U.N.C.L.E.” and “Journey to the Far Side of the Sun”), and later became a producer, eventually becoming president of MGM/UA Television Productions in the 1980’s.