Waiting for my dream girl

[a9127]

Descendants 3 was awesome. Watched it last Friday night with my nieces as planned. I gave it an “A” on a fan site later that evening. “Hades” does in fact turn out to be “Mal’s Dad.” He is, as played by Cheyenne Jackson one of my two favorite characters in the movie (the other is his daughter of course. ).

If they ever decide to do a 4th Descendants, they would make the most amazing Father/Daughter superhero combo ever. Either that or just have them join the cast of the “Avengers.”

So I’ve decided to go as Hades for Halloween (even though I’m still not old enough to be Dove’s dad ). The problem is getting a date. Dating my own “daughter” would be too weird (did I already say I’m not old enough to be her dad? Oh I did? Sorry… ) although my wife said she would go as “Mal” if I wanted. That might work. And our friends would probably think it was hilarious.

But of course, several months ago I already decided who I wanted to be my date for Halloween this year. She can be no one other than my friend Aleksandra from Russia who makes a very sexy yet bloody cosplay “Carrie.” I think the two of us would make a great couple. Especially with her riding on the back of my Harley looking like that.

We could always drop in on her prom later and "raise hell." Definitely would be a night to remember.

[a9127]

“Over 50?” WTF? This is worse than “Born before 1987.” Why am I getting things from the AARP? I met her on "DateHookup.com." After dinner we went back to her place. She said she’d suck my dick if I signed my ZR-1 over to her. Guess I'll be taking Uber home tonight.

(No. He can't be "50." God I hope I die first. Looked it up. All I could find was "document." And of course the second picture. Maybe I should hang on to the ZR-1 a little longer? )

[a9127]

Even after all these years I still workout regularly. I’m definitely of the “old school, no pain no gain” heavy weights and cardio method. Which for me now goes back almost 25 years. It worked well for me when I played football and it’s working well for me now as I continue through my 30’s.

I go to Anytime Fitness in Zionsville maybe 3x a week. I like to go late at night because I usually get the place to myself. Sometimes there’s a few other “night owls” who come in to do the treadmill or lift light weights. There are some “crossfitters” as well but they usually have scheduled times during the day.

Anyway the gym has flat screen TV’s all over. Usually playing ESPN, old movies, news, or replays of Colts games. Sometimes they play “infomercials.”

Last night they had an infomercial for something called “PiYo.” I had never heard of it before but its spokeswoman (and creator as I would later learn) was an incredibly fit very perky blonde. I’m not much into this stuff but she sure got my attention. She had an upbeat personality almost to the point where I could see how some might find it annoying but I really liked her positive attitude.

She clearly was not a “19 year old fitness model” (although I thought she looked great ) and that made me even more interested in her. I would have guessed she was at least my age or older.

I took some time out to watch the ad (OK, actually her…) then resumed my workout. When I got back home early this morning I looked up “PiYo.”

Her name is Chalene Johnson and she was born in 1969 which makes her 50. Damn. They should put her in those stupid “Born before 1985” ads instead of all those 80 year old men. Who knows, I might even join the “AARP.”

I learned more about PiYo but also learned that Chalene is married. But then so am I. Sigh…

Anyway here’s a few pictures of Chalene. Does PiYo work? Probably. Any exercise program will if you stick with it. But I was looking mostly at the last picture. I was thinking that I’d have to get underneath her to really find out. If she ever wants to visit Zionsville, it's a date.

[a9127]

This'll work.

Originally Posted by student1983

just curious,

who of all the visitors seriousely had a relation or a longer ongoing sexual relation with a shemale?

Nope. 37 today and never been kissed...

[Boner]

My dream girl for today is gorgeous opera diva Joyce DiDonato!

My fantasy is I’m a young guy just discovering women and she’s my babysitter! She notices my attraction to her and she starts to tease me. I absolutely love it and this naughty teasing goes on for years. Finally, when I’m old enough, she lets me explore her and teaches me everything!

[a9127]

I had presented the case of Mr. Ratelband several months ago but somehow it got deleted. Like so many things in life, it seems it all comes down to getting laid. He had petitioned a judge to reduce his legal age by 20 years. Anyway, here is his story once again:

Emile Ratelband of the Netherlands, claims to have a “45-year-old body,” describing himself as a “young god.” If he feels so young, is in such good health, and really is godly, why the need to change his official age?

69-year-olds don’t get as many hits on Tinder.

“When I’m on Tinder and it says I’m 69, I don’t get an answer. When I’m 49, with the face I have, I will be in a luxurious position.” Emile told Dutch newspaper De Telegraaf.

Emile Ratelband is reportedly a media personality who voiced Vladmir Trunkov in the Dutch-dub of Pixar’s Cars 2. He also calls himself an entrepreneur and self-help guru.

Ratelband also claims that because of his advanced age, companies aren’t willing to hire him. In his defense, the entertainment industry is terrible about hiring people over a certain age – no matter how good you look.

However, Mr. Ratelband‘s claim that “You can change your name. You can change your gender. Why not your age?” is a bit myopic. Mr. Ratelband isn’t outwardly female, LGBTQ+, a person of color, or of a low economic class, so him saying age is more discriminated against than anthing else it’s a bit insensitive.

It’s this last part of Ratelband’s argument that I find particularly offensive. It shows his complete lack of understanding of what it means to be Transgender. And a “young god” he is not. A quick scan of his picture on the “How Old Do I Look” app shows that he may wish to have significantly more years legally deducted from his age. Or find one hell of a good plastic surgeon.

But he has given me a great idea!!! I’ve decided to petition a judge to make me “18” again so that I can be the same age as Hayley Williams in these pictures.

(Note: The court as expected, turned down Mr. Ratelband’s request. Guess he’ll have to suck it up or lie like the rest of us… )

[a9127]

This is as good a place as any to post this.

While I will remain a member of TLB, I’m just not into it anymore. Not really worth the trouble to participate anymore. I am beginning another school year and after getting back from vacation, my company is picking up a lot of business. My WordPress site is getting far more recognition for my posts and stories. Been using the “Trans Ally” flag as my logo which makes more sense as I identify as “straight” yet have had relationships with transwomen. Also I’m married to a ciswoman. I have a lot of life experiences to share.

On my WordPress site I have far greater freedom (and control over) whatever I want to post and don’t have to worry about things getting “stomped on” or putting up with snide comments from other users. My biography on WordPress has gotten a lot of reaction and many have said they liked my profile picture. One of my wife’s friends even said I “looked 23” and another said I “couldn’t be over 30.” So I guess I can’t complain.

There’s no need to be anonymous either. No porn involved and I can discuss issues of importance. I’m better able to support my friends in the LGBT community. Hell, other than my language sometimes, I’d not be ashamed to let my Mom or Dad read it.

Probably my best read piece was my tribute to Sharon Tate last summer. It got more views and likes than anything I’ve ever posted. Interestingly it got absolutely zero attention on this site. That among other things told me this really isn’t the place for me. Good luck to the future of TLB. And I hope my friends on here will stay in touch. You are the reason I’ve remained as long as I have.