Waiting for my dream girl

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SIBERIA – Russian men are choosing to spend their time with rubber women rather than real women.

In a trend that is growing across Russia, men are not pursuing women anymore for relationships, companionship or even sex. Instead they are purchasing rubber women and spending their leisure time with them, rather than trying to find a girlfriend.

“Russian women are too demanding, too difficult. It is much easier to go to the store, buy a girlfriend and be done with it,” said Viktor Kuchin, 29. (Me: You mean WalMart has them? )

It all started near the Ob reservoir (Ob Sea) in Novosibirsk, Siberia. Several men decided to hold a Rubber Woman Party, (Me: I couldn’t face my friends afterward… ) in which men were invited to come with their favorite rubber woman. “That was the best party we’ve had in Novosibirsk in ten years. The men talked about sports and business while the rubber women just stood in the corner. Later, everybody had sex with their rubber girlfriend. It was a perfect night.” (Me: Somehow I don’t think so… )

The women of Novosibirsk, the third largest Russian city after Moscow and St. Petersburg, are not amused. “Siberian men are shit,” said Anya Goddosky. “They think that by taking these rubber women to the beach and restaurants and on dates, that women will pay more attention to them. (Me: Yeah, to avoid them… ) But, we will not. They are clowns. And those rubber women are whores. Clowns and whores.” (Me: I don’t know how an “inanimate object” could be a whore. But these guys sure seem like clowns to me… )

(And to think all those years I wasted my time marrying two beautiful women in real life and then kept hoping I would meet someone on here before I got married for the second time. Shit. Instead, I could have been enjoying the last ten years with a “rubber girlfriend.” )

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One trend I’ve noticed with these “man/doll” relationships is a vast “age difference.” I genuinely feel sorry for the Japanese man that married the anime character. Something is wrong. He clearly could find a human partner but he obviously suffers from extreme shyness and has been bullied by women acquaintances and co-workers whom he has attempted to ask out.

I have far less sympathy for some of the others. The man on the left has been married to plastic women nine (!) times and has made many misogynistic comments. He has said he “prefers dolls to living women.” Sounds like a real winner.

The second guy… Yeah dude, you wish. The sad thing is he is married, in his late 50’s (he looks older to me) and “sleeps” with his “rubber girlfriend” four times a week. Damn, that’s a lot of Viagra.

The third guy. Well I can’t imagine why he can’t get a date? I wonder what these guys do? Do their coworkers know? Do they even have jobs? Some are married. My wife would kill me if I ever brought one of these “dolls” home. I’m not sure this will become acceptable until the dolls are more like humans and we have all retreated into isolation. Sad. Right now they are, at best, very expensive (“Michelle” was almost $8,000) “masturbation” devices. I want a partner that is my best friend and lover, someone I can relate to, someone I can talk to. A real live "warm" living person I can snuggle up to at night. And when I get to be the age of most of these guys, someone who knows CPR and can dial 911 if I have a heart attach during sex.

(I know the one in the middle picture is thinking "How did I get stuck with this loser? I wish he was 6'4", in his 30's, financially well off, drove a black ZR-1, and lived in Zionsville. Shit I couldn't care less whether he's married or not..." )

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Shit. Just found this out today. I thought things were going really well between us too...

From the New York Daily News:

A phony German “heiress” who lived as a Manhattan socialite by allegedly stealing from banks, credit card companies and her upper-crust friends threw a temper tantrum Friday because she didn’t want to wear jail clothes to court, her lawyer said.

Finally — at 11:30 a.m., two hours after the start of the regular session in Manhattan Supreme Court — Anna Sorokin appeared at the defense table, clad in black pants with a white button-down blouse, with the cuffs on both her blouse and pants rolled up.

Sorokin, 28, was also upset about the treatment she’s been getting on Rikers Island, her lawyer, Todd Spodek, said.

Sorokin’s issues held up the testimony of Ryan Salem, a City National Bank employee who — based on bogus financial information Sorokin allegedly provided — considered the young woman for a $22 million loan to open an event space on Park Ave. South.

Sorokin allegedly scored $275,000 from banks, credit card companies and other victims by playing the role of a wealthy socialite born into means.

Spodek, on cross-examination, grilled Salem about whether he was really ready to dispense that type of business loan on behalf of the then 25-year-old self-proclaimed trust-funder.

Sorokin is accused of reporting to the bank that she was worth as much as $60 million.

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I've long wanted to find a decent priced drum set that was made well enough so I wouldn't beat it to pieces. But I don't want to spend thousands on something that I will most likely suck at. Probably a large sized "Bonham/Led Zeppelin" kit with massive bass drum would be my best bet. Clear amber Vistalite just like his.

As I posted in the "Sing a Long" thread when I was 10 I talked my mom and dad into letting me get a drum set and start taking lessons after seeing "Wayne's World." That ended soon after as my mom finally tired of the noise coming from our basement.

Was on eBay this afternoon and this ad somehow caught my attention.

The drum featured is an old Ludwig tom tom from 1972 but I'm more interested in the girl featured in the ad. Is she the seller? She doesn't look 47. Maybe they're her grandfathers drums? I may just have to go down there and see what this is all about.

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Miley and Hayley both have numerous tattoos so I thought it would increase my chances with them if I got a few myself...

Somehow it didn't quite work out the way I'd hoped.

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I thought this was fake at first because it showed up in one of those CNN "ads" about "Youngest Female Billionaires." Of course I clicked on it...

But actually she's real! Her name is Marie Besnier Beauvalot a French Heiress worth over 5 billion dollars and my "future wife."

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I've expressed an interest in learning to play drums. But I had no idea it was so sexy...