Waiting for my dream girl

[a9127]

The first step in on-line dating they say is to write a good description of yourself. So here goes...

Actually, I was a poor student (had to repeat first grade twice) and then was cut from my 5th grade flag football team. Was born in 1949. Drive a beat up ’84 Buick. Still a virgin. Live in a rusted out trailer near Zionsville. 5’7” 300 pound “musclehead.” Smoke weed, do meth and coke regularly. Favorite album is Pat Boone “In a Metal Mood.” Favorite song is “Afternoon Delight.” Favorite movie is “Pee Wee’s Big Adventure.” Got fired from my job delivering for Pizza Hut. The only exercise I get is going out to my mailbox to collect my welfare check. Other than that I sit around all day jacking off to t-girl porn off my neighbor’s unsecured Wi-Fi connection. Into autoerotic asphyxiation and CBT. Once I tried picking up prostitutes down on Washington street but even they wouldn’t have anything to do with me. There was this one that was really hot but she turned out to be a cop.

Sound better?