Quote:
Originally Posted by transjen
In a nutshell YES
 Jerseygirl Jen |
Isn't that the dilemma for the Transwomen who are living in stealth ....
When do you tell people about your past .... ?
Tell them after you have established a relationship this happens .... they feel cheated, feel it's a lie, they question their own sexuality. It says far more about their own security than anything about the Girl.
In saying that, if they have never encountered a TS Woman before then perhaps you can understand it being a bit of a mindfuck. They have grown up with the standard concept of gender and sexuality .... invested their time in a relationship with a genetic girl .... and suddenly they have to question their own morality, take on board some of the issues that the Transwoman has had to face .... What will other people think, family and friends etc ....
The Trans-woman has come to terms with herself over a long period of time .... slowly built up her confidence and come out to the world when she was ready ....
Perhaps they will come round and see the person behind the "status" ..... but if not ... it says more about their lack of character.
On the flipside .... The Transwoman tells the friend/partner early on .... before the relationship has started, before the bonds of trust are established ... and they can't take it. They split and suddenly she risks being outed to everyone where she may otherwise have been completely living in stealth.
It's not the same as where the TG is open about it and forms a relationship and friends with this in full knowledge .... perhaps the guy is into transgendered women and comfortable and secure in his own sexuality.
My heart goes out to you Jen, it really does ..... surround yourself in friends and chocolate ..... Time is the healer.
Kirsty
xxx xxx
02-16-2010
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