Never camp in a valley bottom, 'cos it will turn out to be a frost hollow, and you will wake up with your tent covered in ice. Never camp on top on a hill either, because 1, it will be too windy, 2 it will be to slopey, and 3 it will be too fucking lumpy. Halfway up is the best place. Or in a wood. Tho if you're in a wood, a badger may get in your tent and rip your testicles off.
Also, camper vans are not camping, its caravanning, which is the lowest of all forms of holidaying.
Also, real camping involves fitting everything on your back and walking to the campsite, otherwise it's just sleeping in a tent next to your car (unless there's a moderate chance of being eaten by a bear, in which case it becomes camping again.).
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08-02-2008
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