What to do

[Swampboy123]

First of all I would like to say that the most beautiful thing I have ever seen was a hot shemale with a smoking body and a thick cock they are just like everyone else you have ugly ones and beautiful ones some you can still see manly signs but some you can't tell and wow, so to start this I was molested by a teenage boy when I was 9 don't know if it has a bearing on my fantasy or not but fast forward 20 yrs I was married to my 3rd wife and we had some kinky sex but we got on some hard drugs (coke) and we would lay around and watch porn and I would get so horny watch those girls suck cock and get pounded my wife would even use a dildo on me but something didn't feel right when I saw my first picture of a shemale I was mesmerized well long story short yrs later no longer with that wife and clean and sober I still love to watch porn love to watch shemale porn and still fantsize about the woman for some reason I can't get in to gay porn don't know why but I stumbled across sissy hypno trainer videos and I am hooked well since I started watching it I get really excited and wish that was me getting fucked like that but once again something about a guy gets to me,I have searched and searched for a shemale to make my fantasy come true but all I can find are escorts can't afford to do that so I just deal with it and masturbate well last night for some reason I couldn't stand it and broke down and met up with a guy and let him fuck me well he stuck his cock in my mouth and it was cool but looking at a man on the other end of that cock didn't do much for me but when he put me on my stomach and put that cock in me and I closed my eyes pretending it was a shemale something came alive inside that drove me nuts and feeling that big cock slide back and forth pretending it was a shemale I was begging for it all I can say is wow I got fucked for an hour and my ass is still is quivering. I watched my favorite video this morning and every time she got her ass slammed I could feel it in mine. Now I know beyond a doubt that I want a shemale to do to me the things guys do to them and the girls in the sissy training videos don't want a guy because like I said I feel weird about looking up and see a dude but I know if I looked up and saw a beautiful lady on the other side of that cock I would totally loose myself hire an escort you say but none them will cum until the end of night or want to be on bottom so my question where do I find a beautiful lady that would use me and abuse for one night make me swallow her love juice