How openminded are we truly?

[smc]

Originally Posted by Gor Gar

... If anybody has any advice or pointers for me over this situation I would greatly appreciate it. This friend has invited me to come spend a few days visit with them sometime this summer, something I've done before, but honestly I don't know if I'd feel comfortable with it now, and I don't know if I'm right about this, or I'm being a closed-minded jerk.

It's hard to tell how close this friend has been. Knowing someone over many years doesn't necessarily translate into the intimacy that comes with "bosom" friendships. But if you are close, here's my advice: spend those days in the summer, but make it clear to your friend that you're having trouble, as you say, wrapping your brain around the change that has taken place. Make it clear that the trouble is with you, not your friend. That is EXTREMELY IMPORTANT. You cannot be judgmental. Tell your friend you want to visit, and explain that you may find it difficult because of your own distance from open-mindedness. Ask for forgiveness in advance of showing up, so if you have to leave before the visit is over, you can do so without rupturing the friendship forever. Tell your friend that even if you do feel uncomfortable and have to leave, you're committed to beginning work on restoring the friendship immediately thereafter.

If this person is a true friend, and you are a true friend, there will be understanding about all this beyond what you can fathom right now.