wannabe a tgirl now

[Naked Freedom]

i belong to a country where the third sex is a taboo, and therefore was not aware of it until very recently.....i.e about 2 years from now. i was just aware of cross dressers but i could not even try that fully.


When i was about 4 or 5 years old i used to urge my sisters to dress me in their pretty frock, which they did with joy as they were also about the same age probably a year older or so. They thought of it as a childish game of mine... and i too thought likewise....


at the age of 11 or so i felt some sort of pain in my nipples... there was a little tissue appearing under my nipples (obviously under the skin) and i told it to my mother.... she took me to a doctor and he gave me some medicines and the pain subsided and the tissue disappeared. on asking my mother said that breasts were about to grow on my body but now its alright.... i took it as a joke.


Tucking my dick and sac was a habit which had been there in me since childhood.....(4 or 5 years). i even had a nude photo where i covered my nipples and tucked my cock and sac.

i have played mostly pretend games and boardgames during my early childhood..... but these shifted to soccer and hockey from when iwas about 15.


in plays staged at my school i have played a female role thrice. my teachers complimented that i played them well... not just by appearance.... they said that the body language was very good.
i used to wear lipstick and kiss on various things and kept it in my collection.

in school many of my friends teased me for my way of walking, it resembled that of a girls. in fact they also said that my body curves were similar to that of girls, broader in the pelvic region thinner at the waist and broad chest. i had avery hard time correcting my posture.my skin has always been smooth and soft muscled but there are a lot of hairs.

but now after seeing people changing their birth sex to be more comfortable with their bodies...i want to change as well. i m about 24 now but afraid to come out in the open.
a secret i was the desire of many students and got fucked by 7 or 8 of them while in school. but it was a boys school.
i was in a relationship with agirl for about 8 months then got bored and quit.
but i continued with the boys

while watching shemale porn on the net,the feeling of being the tgirl rather than being the one with the tgirl overwhelmed me most of the times. i was just envious of their smooth skin and nice breasts along with their soft dicks.
i imagined myself taking a tgirl cock in my ass, and being in a 69 with her. the feeling of fucking her ass was seldom and rare.


recently another thought, which entered the mind was my dick getting smaller. i started to feel that it looks nice smaller....and am getting erections which are not very hard, i m just about 24. nowadays i get myself erect by rubbing on the foreskin and the glans and imagining things, which was not the case before. earlier i used to get erect watching at videos

since i thought that nothing could be done to alter my body i just tried to change my mind and slowly the matter went into oblivion. those thoughts kept on coming but i drove them away. but now as i have realised that i can vhange my body... the thoughts have again surrounded my mind... i dont want to drive them away but embrace it.



am i a patient of gender dysphorria or are these fantasies or age related? please advise. i have taken an online test 15 times to rest my doubts.....none of the times was i categorised as standard male, only once as feminine male, 8 times as androgynous and 5 times as probable transexual and twice as transsexual.... i answered honestly depending upon at that moment what i was feeling. i know they are not the sole parameters to judge but it seemed worth a try.
should i take the road to transsexualism or upto the mid stages or no action???? what is the initial process???


any body here having similar thoughts or experiences.

[transjen]

Been there, i know what you're going thru i had SRS this jan first step is coming to terms with yourself then find a therapist then hormones then the real life test if you choose to have the final step like i did but it's not easy Jennifer

[Naked Freedom]

thanks for the insight. can u share ur experiences as a man which prompted this decision?

[transjen]

Originally Posted by biswajyoti

thanks for the insight. can u share ur experiences as a man which prompted this decision?

Well i knew i should have been a girl since i was 5 or 6 years old, As a kid i never fit in with the other boys so grewing up i had a rought time as i was everyones punching bag when i was 14 or so i found out there were outs like me when i found a book at the libary called second serve by Renne Richards and after reading her book everything became clear to me and i know what i had to do flash forward a few years and i found a therapist who lead me down the path to find my true self after hormone replacement breast implants minor facial surgery and finaly SRS i'm finaly who i'm supposed to be i was always Jennifer on rhe inside and now i'm Jennifer on the outside and i'm very happy with no regretts will other then not being a Ggirl but i've done all i can and am as close as medicaly possiable Jennifer

[Naked Freedom]

consulting a physician might be very costly....i doubt whether physians in my country will understand the problem...i fear the consequences when people will come to know about it
i am very much concerned about what will befall on my family.....especially my parents.

[Bionca]

www.tsroadmap.com is a good place to start to sort out what you will want to do. They try to make the resources as international as they can. Unfortunately, in some places there are simply no good options for TGs.

One thing I would caution against is relying too much on online tests. The questions can be worded in such a way as to get specific results - so even if you are 100% honest answering them, your answer may still be influenced by how the question was worded.

Ultimately, the only person who will be able to sort this out is you. With the aid of a therapist, this can be much easier. Still a good therapist will only aid you in figuring out what's going on.

There is also no single way that Trans* women come to identify as trans*. For example, before I transitioned, I have very little desire to dress in women's clothes. I never had a feeling of "releaf" when I did. Some TGs will say something completely different. The only thing that I think unites Trans* women and spearates us from cross-dressers, Drag Queens, TVs (all of which are perfectly fine things to be) is a sense early on that *something* was all wrong as we were growing up. That "something" has no word to define it, but every trans* woman I know understands what I'm talking about.

[transjen]

Originally Posted by biswajyoti

consulting a physician might be very costly....i doubt whether physians in my country will understand the problem...i fear the consequences when people will come to know about it
i am very much concerned about what will befall on my family.....especially my parents.

Sounds like you want it to be a easy switch, Hate to break it to you but there is no easy way to do it, It's hard both money and what you have to go thru both mental and physcial it costs money for the therapist and hormones and hair removal then there's surgery breast implant facial and so on then you will need a new warobe then there is a good chance you'll lose your job and career then there's your family and friends some will want nothing to do with you after you tell them then there's the name calling and worse from strangers. Sorry there is no magic pill that only happens in stories Jennifer