Terms are a sticky thing.
I use Trans Woman because it is a combination of adjective and noun, like "tall woman" or "Asian man". It allows for differentiation where one is needed, but does not center cis (non-trans) identities as "normal" or "real".
I generally try to avoid using "shemale" since it has such a nasty history (google Janice Raymond and the Transsexual Empire"). I rarely hear it used outside the porn industry, except from guys looking for a hook up (not really much different from porn).
Personally, I think most conversations can happen without the adjectives.
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