...Where was I? Oh, remarking about your great writing style and ability to express your inner feelings that many of us struggle at putting in words. You write with a maturity that far exceeds your age and I just have to think its a result of your past experiences and great power of observation. I can imagine you in a crowded room taking a break from your own social butterflying to sit back and watch the room dynamics happening in front of you.I like your admission of being a realist. There aren't many of you/us around here on the internet and I suppose it is because this "electronic" means of communication can provide the individual with a wonderful facade to be whom ever he/she want to be. I have spent countless hours in conversations regarding online love, online boy friends and friends. I know myself well enough to know that I can not fall in love with someone on line...fall in love with their typing..their written words is beyond my understanding. Maybe it is truly the "Lonely Hearts Club" members that so desperately long for love and a partner to share their world with. Maybe there really is a part of the man that drives him for acceptance(and love) that I still don't understand. My first instinct is to laugh when I chat with a man on line that says he has a girl friend...but yet has never met her face to face....but really I should be feeling sadness I think. My years of relationships..in love, out of love,looking for love, convinced me that love will happen again for me and I hope it will bring with it passion and excitement and better better than the last love. BUT I know this will only happen by being with that person..........not merely by us typing our feelings and thoughts online.

To that end, I'm finally beginning to convince myself that if I expect to find that "love"..that "partner", I need to be thinking about moving to his country(if I think I want an Western partner). I'm not afraid to admit that I have jumped on a plane a few times to cross many times zones to meet that "special person" that after months of phone calls, e-mails and chatting "we" felt we were a match.....only to find upon arrival that we were not compatible...or worse yet, he had just met his perfect girlfriend the previous day. Do I regret those trips? Never..I learn a lot each time I venture into a new situation. It's from these experiences that I feel confident that being on the ground in him "back yard" so to speak, is the best way to build a connection.

In the event that my future partner is in a foreign country and we decide that our best option is for me to move there in order to be together......does that move put too much pressure on her....on the relationship....to "force" it to work and not allow it to grow along its natural course. "Don't move here for me, but rather move here for yourself"....are wise words I have heard spoken.

Compatibility in a relationship is the goal and I try to be "realistic" in accepting that living in a foreign country can add stress by itself(I lived in Philippines but had traveled Asian) and then add to that the big cultural differences ......lest I forget that gender might further complicate the situation. I view myself as smart, practical, analytical, open minded and color/gender blind..........so I would hope that good communication...opening up to all feelings, thoughts, and apprehensions would clear the path to a good relationship. My analytical side could keep me tied up for months or years trying to figure all this out......I'm beginning to think that for me...jumping in head first may be the best approach. Follow my heart, trust my instinct, and go for it.