[steve65]

There seems to be a lot of concern over 'labelling' when it comes to the subject of dating transgendered individuals. I have been on many blogs devoted to the subject of dating Asian ladyboys, and it appears there are a large number of guys who are keen to explore this avenue, but are concerned about either what other people will think of them, and moreso what they will actually think of themselves.

Most guys who are ready to embark on a LB relationship are concerned with the 'gay' label. 'Does this mean I am gay?' they invariably ask. They are worried about their own sexuality, rather than embracing a new way of loving. Realistically, does it matter? I hope in this post to allay some of the fears being shown by guys unable to cross that final hurdle.

A 'gay' person is one who is stimulated only by members of their own sex, whether they be male or female. A 'bisexual' person is one who can be stimulated by members of both sexes, and a 'heterosexual' or 'straight' person is one who is stimulated only by members of the opposite sex.

So guys, if you previously have had only biological females as girlfriends but are wanting to experiment in the transgendered field, the odds are that you are 'straight, but with bisexual tendencies' - but do you really need or want this label to satisfy your own concerns?

To further complicate matters, my experiences show there are three distinct categories of ladyboys.

The first (which I have found to be in the minority, but will always stand corrected if it can be shown otherwise), are those who are the absolute examples of a 'female born in a male body'. Their main aim in life is to undergo a full sex change and to live life completely as a woman. Quite often they abhor their male genitalia, many are on chemical castration hormones, and have no interest in their penis other than for peeing out and the sooner they can change that the better.

The second category are those who take on the role of a female, but have no intention of getting rid of their penis, but will act completely as a female. They do not wish to engage in sexual activities as a male, but will delight in penile stimulation.

The third category are those as in Category 2, but will also delight in undertaking the role of a male lover, either with other males or in many cases with females. They are very proud of their male genitalia, although they too live as women.

It could be argued therefore, that if your interest is in only Category 1 ladyboys, and you also have no interest in their male genitalia that you are 'straight', and that you are looking more for an emotionally leaning relationship with a ladyboy. That you would prefer your ladyboy to have all the characteristics of a female. This to me indicates you are 'straight' as defined by society.

If your preference is for Category 3 ladyboys (which I unashamedly admit my girlfriend falls into) it could be argued that you are straight, but with strong bisexual tendencies.

You may not know exactly where you fit until you have experienced the ladyboy dating scene. When I started dating ladyboys I had no intention of being in the category 3. It was introduced to me by my current girlfriend. You may find, as I have, that it adds a further dimension to your sex life.

My advice is simple. Embrace your new lifestyle. If labels and 'what people will think' worries you to such a degree, then quite simply this lifestyle is not for you. Taking a ladyboy lover for a permanent relationship takes a lot of adjusting. It is a major change in your life, and many things have to be thought through. Do not look on your ladyboy lover as a sex toy. It is so much deeper than this, and you will find that she has emotional needs the same as any genetic girl will. It took me around 12-18 months into my now 4-year relationship to fully accept and commit to what I was doing. After a life of dating only genetic girls it was a big paradigm shift. However, the love I have found and the excitement of having such a wonderful relationship has left me in no doubt I have made the right choice.