Oh Dan your comments are so generous! Thank you!
I never thought about that experience on those terms before but I am sure you are right. I have sat through enough psychological assessments to last a lifetime but when asked 'when did I first feel I was a girl' or some version of that I always talked about the usual stuff that happens at 10 or 11. In fact it started way before then but until recently could never think when. 6-9 sounds right but when within that I have no idea although I am tempted to say 8.
I agree that transgenderism is buried deep inside us. Once even a glimpse of it has been revealed to you there is nothing else you can do but live it as best you can however hard the knocks.
Looking back I have had a relatively easy ride. Despite this every time I step outside my door is an adventure. My current introspection has been triggered by two contrasting events. I won one of my company's 'employee of the year' awards last year which was celebrated in February (don't ask) after which I decided to take some days off and visit the grave of my closest TG friend who died tragically three years ago. I hadn't been back since the funeral because it had hit me so hard. She was a wild, beautiful spirit who inspired me with the way she embraced her transgendered nature so completely yet cut herself down after being betrayed by someone she thought she could trust. Her parents who had loved and supported her transition lived a few blocks away. I knew them and loved them but I couldn't call because I knew I had no answer to why her and not me. We have to hold on so tight to what we know to be right just to survive.
Princess Vagina.
Quote:
Originally Posted by danthepoetman
Sounds strangely to me like one of these first experiences of self consciousness, identified as happening between 6 and 9 by modern psychology. Some remember, some don?t. I find absolutely remarkable that you have lived yours in such a fashion, Princess, if it is indeed that precise experience we?re talking about. It would mean you have discovered yourself (your own self, your conscience) as a girl. It is another testimony of how deep a reality transsexualism is. It shows how little you have to do with what you feel deep down. We?re advancing faster and faster in both fields of endocrinology and neurology, and I?m sure we will soon find definite, positive elements to show that it is a biological condition. But already your beautiful post shows how profound this reality is. Beautiful post, Princess!
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