I have met only one bonefide transexual* during a conference and I referred to her with proper pronouns (such as "her") and used "dear" when I felt it was appropriate (as in "let me get that door for you dear") just as I would a "genetic woman" who was younger than myself.
It takes a lot of work and a lot of confidence to make that transformation, far be it from me to ignore that effort. I have always felt that a pronoun and some curtesy is a small thing compared to the troubles that a transgendered individual might have.
And I ignored the whole transexual issue altogether. She did not say anything about it, and I did nothing to indicate I knew any better. In fact, I acted no differently around her, I flirted with her just as much as the other gals.
*I'm not counting the genetic man who was in the middle of the process and wearing and living as a female with no alterations yet. The same as the rest of this post went for her.
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