Do a search of this forum and you will find other threads asking the exact same thing.
I will say two things though
1. Do not ever self medicate. There are too many risks.
2. Do not treat becoming a transwoman as a fetish. Reality is far different from fantasy and you have a lot to learn about yourself before you can even think of travelling down that road. Ask any transwoman on this site or elsewhere about their experiences before you even contemplate transitioning. This is something that you have to be absolutely certain about. Should you transition then I wish you all the best.
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