Oh, you wanted humor? ;)

A friend of mine told me these two jokes about a certain part of the "limey" world. Can you tell he harbors some ill feelings against those in his home region?

What happens to an Essex girl's arsehole after sex?
He get's sent out for pizza.

How does an Essex girl turn the light on after sex?
She open's the car door.

Ah yes, the Essex Girl jokes - very popular over here about 20 years ago, here's a couple more:

What does an Essex girl put behind her ears to make her more attractive?
Her ankles.

What's the difference between a Essex girl and an ironing board?
Sometimes you have trouble getting the legs apart on an ironing board.

Not exactly politically correct these days I guess :)

Who gives a crap about political correctness when there's such a motherlode of richness to mine?!

What's an Essex girl's favorite wine?
"Aw go on. Take me to Lakeside. Please! Please! Go on, take me!

What's an Essex girl's form of protection?
A bus shelter.

I forgot my all-time favorite:

What's the difference between an Essex girl and an Essex boy?
An Essex girl has a higher sperm count.

Well, OK then...

What is the difference between a walrus and an Essex girl?
One is wet, has a moustache and smells of fish - the other is a walrus.

What's the difference between an Essex girl and a Rolls Royce?
Not everyone has been in a Rolls Royce.

You do realize that most of these jokes have an American version in the "blonde joke" genre, right? ;)

What does an Essex girl say after sex?
"Do you really all play for the same football team?"

Why do Essex Girls wear knickers?
To keep their ankles warm.

What's the difference between an Essex girl and a washing machine?
A washing machine doesn't follow you around for weeks after you've dumped your load in it.

Okay, I'm "spent" ... and it's time to go eat dinner. :lol:

west midlands here

Yeah - outside of Cardiff.

newbie from Bristol area looking for tgirl fun.. This part of the woods doesn't seem to have much in the way of TGirls... :(

Swindon :) not tooo far from brum

Northants
 

Hi im bi guy 29 from northampton. i love wearin panties n feelin a hot cock slowly fill me up.

Hey I'm from Edinburgh,

Any Ireland folks? Im lookin to meet others! :)

Anyone in the York or Yorkshire area? :p

Who is around Newcastle - Sunderland - Durham - Cramlington???

Im in cambridgeshire. :) Any tgirl is more than welcome to look me up.

me i abode in sheffield, it would be literally a dream to come true to meet and spend a heavenly night with your gorgeous self...

sample
 

heres two photos of moi, anyone like what they see?

Hey
 

Any one who fancys talking to me?

mangermouse @ hotmail. co.uk

Ideally looking for t-girls but am up for chatting to anyone im so bored

I'm from Stoke, Staffordshire

Im from leighton Buzzard and looking for fun. ;)

I'm from the UK, I live in Birmingham. Any tran females want to meet up or cam for some seriously hard :turnon:and dirty:coupling:fun?

Chesterfield, derbyshire, for me,

Appears to be a ts free zone, searched hard, ............
can only find hairy panty wearers, just not my thing :innocent:

hi babes
 

you come see me any time you like ill show around:heart:

Im from hertfordshire and looking to meet up with a shemale to fuck my virgin ass , and make me her bitch. I can travel :D xx

North Yorkshire, not far from Harrogate

Who would like to meet up (West London - Kingston)
 

Hi beautiful people, I'm from West London (Kingston). Who would like to meet up? If you check my threads I have uploaded pics of myself & yes! That is my cock in my avatar pic. I also have my tongue pierced =P

Bristol/london , Looking For You
 

I would love love love to meet someone from here, standard male, been complimented on looks before, aswell as other things ;) message me for email x

hiya
 

im in preston would love meet some1

:)
 

hi anna im from huddersfield
come ride my big cock

Southwest Male
 

First the serious bit, I am married and though she is aware I look I am discrete as she does not want involvement or knowledge of what I am up to so if you are not OK with it pass me by.

I am quite well endowed and enjoy lots of sex. I am not shy and quite adventurous so I am willing to join in with anything legal and relatively clean and I am bis in the right company. I also enjoy a lot of things not listed in my interests so just ask.

I can also sometimes accommodate daytime's and I am looking for something regular but don't rule out one offs and I am very discrete and would expect the same.

I am genuine so if you are interested and want to take things further please feel free to contact me. I don't mind winks but if I respond expect a reply.

from oxford, pm me if interested

i'm in derby if you wanna meet,

are you a shemale?

send pics to steve.d.blackshaw@gmail.com

liverpool if anyones near

I'm in London, I'm 24 straight guy with these crazy fantasys and I think it's time I make it a reality! I have 8inchs and always hard! Wana helpppp?

newby
 

north staffs anyone????

Near Pontypool

What's does having sex in a canoe and American beer have in common? Both are fucking close to water

Spunk. In the US it is perfectly acceptable for a boss to ask whether you are feeling full of spunk of a morning (i.e. full of get up and go.) This situation in the UK may only arise when a director is quizzing a male actor in the adult entertainment business.

Hi there im from Liverpool U.K :respect:

Harrogate North Yorkshire here
 

Harrogate North Yorkshire anyone up for a meet

Hey I am in London SW :)

Send me a message :)
 

Hello, 21 year old. Looking to hook up with discretion with a hot ladyboy, in the Wirral area.. Can't accommodate, send me a message or add my msn carl-b2012@hotmail.co.uk

Im in london on 13th septber 2013, would love to hook up with ladyboy/shemale. Staying marble arch.
Email me if intrested ready2tryit321@aol.com

Reading, Berkshire. Hello, are there any cd's trans in berkshire or oxfordshire that wiuld like to chat?

Ooohhhhh seven!
 

:coupling:

if anyone wants to do this to me......

ohhh seven nine 6 nine 8 triple five three 9

must accom south cymru UK