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  #1  
Old 04-23-2009
bossymax1981
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Default 10 Simple Rules to Win My Heart...

I've been going about it all wrong. I've been searching for a man who will "have me" when I should be looking for the lucky sap who will win me. Yes, I have my faults. Yes, I am a bit nuts. But when it comes right down to it, I'm a nice woman. I tend to treat people well - too well, in some cases. I have raised my persona pretty much by myself to help family, and even before that, I was pretty much on my own. My family are my greatest joy. I really love being a good hearted child to them.

I also loved being a lady. Unfortunately, the men I was with before didn't love being a boyfriend open to a ladyboy. Not in the way that I wanted them to be. Not in the way I was raised. Perhaps I watched too many old movies. Maybe I expected too much Cary Grant and ended up with Jim Carrey. I settled in the past when it came to men. I was more interested if they liked me than if I liked them. I had things backwards. Because, despite my faults, I finally have realized that I'm a woman worth having.

I've managed to turn a hobby into a living. Continuing to pay a mortgage and keep food on the table. At the age of 26 I changed careers and took the "road less traveled." I'm going to toot my own horn here because that took guts. I'm not saying I wasn't scared - I'm still scared. But I can do it.

Doing what you want to do gives you confidence. Making a living at it is such a rush that no drug on earth can possibly match. I floundered in the sea of love for such a long time without realizing that any many who gets me is lucky.

What does it take to win my heart? Jewelry? Money? No - that's not me. I've had jewelry (I sold it). I've had money (I spent it). Those are tangible items. Not worthy of attention.

A friend on my blog recently wrote to me that he was "old school" and felt it was necessary to open a door for a woman. Some goofy woman complained to him. That would never be me. Rule number one - open the door for me. It shows respect. It makes me feel like a lady.

Rule number two is to show an interest in my life. Learn something about me - anything. Ask about it. I like to talk about things. A lot. I'm a Scorpio - I love attention. For a man to win my heart, he has to give me some attention. Not 24/7 stalking attention - that's annoying and disturbing. But some attention.

Rule number three is he has to like sports. My father likes sports. I associate that with a man. I like a man who likes sports even if he flips through the channels constantly. I like guys who act like guys.

Rule number four is compliments. All woman like this - I'm not alone. "You look nice" is worth more than a dozen roses.

Rule number five is pursuit. A woman likes to feel wanted. This "give me a call" that I hear so often from men drives me nuts. This happens on first dates a lot. A guy will give you his number instead of vice versa. I don't like to feel like I'm chasing anyone - makes me feel like Glenn Close in Fatal Attraction.

Rule number six is don't treat me like some cheap prostitute. I'm not interested in phone sex, web cam sex or any other sex with strangers. Some things are still sacred to me and my body is one of them.

Rule number seven is don't lie to me. I hate liars. And I'm not that stupid. The truth can sometimes hurt, but anything is better than a lie.

Rule number eight is to ask me out on a date. It doesn't have to be ritzy. I am a jeans and sexy top girl. I like ice cream. I like walks. I like anything as long as I enjoy the company.

Rule number nine is don't play me. I hate players even more than liars and they go hand in hand. And I'm getting pretty good at spotting them. The men who come on too strong are the biggest players of all and it's so transparent that it's actually laughable.

Rule Number 10 is don't take my tears as a trophy. Remember that God counts a woman's tears. If I haven't hurt you, don't hurt me. It's not too much to ask.

Remember the old films when men would get up when a woman entered a room? I watch those movies all of the time. If ever a man does that for me, he'll win my heart for ever. I think this phase of manners is over, and it's a shame. Because that would do it for me. That would win my undying devotion.

And, yes, my undying devotion is worth striving for.

~~Princess Lydel~~
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Old 04-23-2009
svartekaptenen svartekaptenen is offline
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I think that your requests are fully justifiable, after all are we not
all of us looking for a kind and loving mate? Pity that you live half a world
away from me otherwise i have asked you out, well nothing to do about that
I suppose, take care and I send you a greeting from the far North.
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  #3  
Old 04-23-2009
franalexes franalexes is offline
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And you expect to find this guy where? on a porn site?
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Old 04-25-2009
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spectek43 spectek43 is offline
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Well some of us ..me for one will take this kind of information and use it, ive been with a few shemales/tgirls, some were paid for....i find myself wanting more then just a night stand thing.....someone who wants to be treated like a lady and all that goes with it..compliments ect.. and i love the pursuit thing..so much of what your saying is the way it should be......I long to win the heart of woman worth having....right on
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Old 04-25-2009
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bossymax1981 View Post
I've been going about it all wrong. I've been searching for a man who will "have me" when I should be looking for the lucky sap who will win me. Yes, I have my faults. Yes, I am a bit nuts. But when it comes right down to it, I'm a nice woman...

Perhaps I watched too many old movies. Maybe I expected too much Cary Grant and ended up with Jim Carrey. I settled in the past when it came to men. I was more interested if they liked me than if I liked them. I had things backwards. Because, despite my faults, I finally have realized that I'm a woman worth having...
For what it's worth, I think these two parts of your post were the MOST important of all. While the other sections talk about what kind of guy you'd like to find, these two address YOUR OWN sense of self-worth and self-being. And I think having a positive state of mind like this, as well as maintaining a strong inner spirit, are what will ultimately lead you to true happiness and finding truer love, Lydel. That's because (in my opinion) any successful relationship that's REALLY going to go the distance should always be based upon two people not just saying they love each other -- after all, words can often just be words -- but instead it should be based on two people actually PROVING it through their daily actions, and thus showing a true sense of commitment towards their partner.

So, you are right to say that you had it backwards. And I think you're right to flip it around and try things in a new and different way. Having a strong sense of pride in yourself and realizing that someone should love you for ALL that you are, inside and out... that they should be willing to fight for YOUR attentions above anyone else's... and they should be willing to PROVE their dedication to you... are all standards you should keep as you go forward. Because love should NEVER be about "settling" for someone, where the implication is that you are lucky to even have someone, so you'd better take whatever you can get. Screw that -- that's a completely defeatist attitude to have, and it's just putting yourself down. Most of all, TRUE love and finding a TRUE partner to build a life with shouldn't be about compromising many of the things you truly believe in or that you hope to have one day.

The bottom line: You DO deserve to have your own dreams and to find true love just like anyone else. Not to settle...not to just accept anything...but to find someone who loves and accepts YOU.

Best of all? That's where the magic kicks in. Because when you do find that person and they truly touch you in so many ways...when they ignite a spark in your heart as well...that's when things will flip around and YOU will be doing your best to prove your intentions TOO. At which point you'll BOTH know it's a real and sincere love -- one based on honest emotions -- because NEITHER of you will be settling. Instead, you'll both be working hard to show your dedication towards the relationship and each other, and towards what you want to build TOGETHER.

So, good for you, Lydel. I think standing up for yourself and declaring that you're not interested in settling anymore...that you now realize deep in your heart that you ARE a good person, and that someone should be happy to have you, for everything that you are inside...is a much healthier way to find true love.
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Old 04-25-2009
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HMMNN sounds like just about every girls wants in a man , But what if you found a guy who meets like 8 out of the ten a guy who doesn't care much for sports or he's a little on the dum side? Some times you need to be a little flexable after all no one is perfect Jennifer
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  #7  
Old 04-25-2009
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bossymax1981 View Post
Remember the old films when men would get up when a woman entered a room? I watch those movies all of the time. If ever a man does that for me, he'll win my heart for ever. I think this phase of manners is over, and it's a shame. Because that would do it for me. That would win my undying devotion. And, yes, my undying devotion is worth striving for.
Well, I don't agree that those manners are gone, so keep thinking positive. "Nice guys" and Cary Grant-like gentlemen are still out there -- or at least I'd like to think so since I consider myself to be one!

In fact, I think there really are MORE nice guys out there than there are bad guys -- it's just that they go unnoticed so much of the time. The problem is, in today's world, where everything is SO fast paced and it often seems that people are too self-centered or they're only interested in immediate gratification, we often fail to notice the "good" people around us. Unfortunately, somewhere along the way -- and the media has ALOT to do with creating this effect and instilling it into our daily mindsets -- the "bad boys" (and bad girls) started to get all the attention. I mean, seriously, who gets to be on the news tonight? The fireman who heroically saved a kid from a burning building or some star in Hollywood who got high on drugs and caused a scene? Who will you be reading about online -- the female teacher who helped her students hit new academic highs in a poor school or Paris Hilton because she was out flashing her flesh in a short dress at some snobby club party, at which point she'll then take home two guys. "Leaked photos" of which (leaked only to help keep her in the news) will then be plastered all over the internet and rammed down people's throats? Whether you want to read about her or not?

So don't give up on the Cary Grants of the world. The truth is, if you ARE a Cary Grant type, you actually go about being a nice guy and don't try to call attention to yourself. You don't try to be a glory hound. You just try to BE a nice guy and go about your daily life. So they're out there willing to hold the door open for you or hold your chair at a restaurant -- you just have to keep your eyes open. :D
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Old 04-25-2009
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Quote:
Originally Posted by franalexes View Post
And you expect to find this guy where? on a porn site?
Now, now, now, Fran -- be nice.
We all found this place and all came here for all sorts of different reasons.
Not all of which is purely sex crazed.
Speaking on behalf of the guys, we're not ALL himbos here.

Cue Bionca speaking up in 10, 9, 8, 7...
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  #9  
Old 04-26-2009
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I will probably always dream of the perfect man. He'll be soo nice and kind and treat me like a delicate flower. He'll always laugh at my jokes and be there when I feel down. He'll never intentionally hurt me; I know we'll fight sometimes, but we'll quickly make-up. He'll never bring up harmful things from my past. He'll take me shoping (without complaining) and out for dinner. He'll even be willing to miss a game with his friends to just sit and talk. We'll go out for walks, go out for drives, go to the movies, or just lay out and watch the stars. We'll make wild passionate love:D almost every night. We'll be inseparable.
I'm not sure if I'll ever find this perfect man. Maybe he's out there, I hope so. But, for now I just settle with some NSA fun. I know its not real love, but it beats a fake relationship any day.
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  #10  
Old 04-26-2009
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Darling... how come I can break all your rules and still have your heart?

MMMWWWAAA! my little Goddess! You have dinner ready tonite at 7 ya?

:-)
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Old 04-26-2009
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tslust View Post
I will probably always dream of the perfect man. He'll be soo nice and kind and treat me like a delicate flower. He'll always laugh at my jokes and be there when I feel down. He'll never intentionally hurt me; I know we'll fight sometimes, but we'll quickly make-up. He'll never bring up harmful things from my past. He'll take me shoping (without complaining) and out for dinner. He'll even be willing to miss a game with his friends to just sit and talk. We'll go out for walks, go out for drives, go to the movies, or just lay out and watch the stars. We'll make wild passionate love:D almost every night. We'll be inseparable.
I'm not sure if I'll ever find this perfect man. Maybe he's out there, I hope so. But, for now I just settle with some NSA fun. I know its not real love, but it beats a fake relationship any day.
Ofcourse you will, darling... it's called passion and that's what it's all about! Who'd want anything less anyway?

H
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  #12  
Old 04-26-2009
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off topic _ Do you have account on xtube ????
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  #13  
Old 04-26-2009
bossymax1981
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Smile Xtube

I had once before but I deleted for some special reason-)
I still have the files though X
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Old 04-26-2009
bossymax1981
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Smile Consequences has to be faced..

Friends and family may find this a shock...as I do have a never-say-die spirit towards every aspect of life. However, sometimes you need to make sacrifices...you need to give up whatever you had faith in to make other people's lives much easier. Obviously, it depends if other people see how much love you have for them, if people know they love you, they will appreciate every decision you make. They may not agree with it, my best friends do not agree with me giving up "suitors and admirers" but I know they accept and appreciate my decision, hence they are my best friends.

Giving up is not easy, but I am ready for that person. It actually does not help any situation but it does do one thing...reconnecting yourself together. Going back to my decision...I had two choices. One was to try and get what I wanted back or it was to simply give up. Now...I gave up...Why? Why did I give up? Was there a need for me to give up? Yes because it made someone else's life easier. What more happiness can that bring...if someone can live their life much easier, with more freedom of thought, more happier. However, each decision has a consequence. My decision to give up on what I wanted back...had a few consequences.

Those consequences were simple...I give up anything that reminded me of what I wanted back. Yahoo and MSN Messengers...I gave it up! After Love is Complicated...I will not write another full-on romantic novel until I get over my memories. I am still a romantic though! The good news is that you will see me writing on the blog a lot more than before!

I give a lot of things thought. Ever decision I make...there is a consequence. In fact...every decision you make there is consequences attached to it. The fact is...do we ignore the consequences or do we carry them out? I have decided now to practice my consequences but let me just remind you...yes, other people may get hurt by it. There is one important issue, is not many will realize how much it hurts you to practice them or even to give-up on something you love more than, possibly, your own life.
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  #15  
Old 04-27-2009
bossymax1981
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Smile Enthusiastic

Love is love fight for it.
I am kind, romantic, sociable and purposeful woman. I like to communicate with
people try to understand them and to help if they need it. I prefer an active
lifestyle. And I am very dynamic. I am quite happy, but I realize that I need
a strong and friendly family to make my life complete. As any person, I need
love for happiness. I am curious in good sense and like discovering everything
new. I am eager to meet my Mr. Right who is responsible, serious,
reliable, understanding and sociable. Who has a very good sense of humour and
loves life. With whom I can spend unforgettable moments and just be happy.
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  #16  
Old 04-29-2009
aa2239 aa2239 is offline
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You go girl, it seems like this is a very empowering experience for you... enjoy it, I'm sure you'll find a worthy suitor soon!
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