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Old 01-30-2014
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LadyboyJerker LadyboyJerker is offline
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Post Friends with benefits?

First, hello to you all, as I wasn't active for quite a while.
And second, I have a big thing on my mind, which sometimes makes me wonder too much.

Let's say that I have found a girl who likes to have casual sex from time to time but as the time passed we just were hooked to each other only for the sex. At one point, I may have felt something but the things she thinks just makes me wanna make that thing I felt go away.
The thing is she likes to be with others too while we have something. She doesn't put borders for me either, but I kinda feel like If she's gonna be with others for one nights only, then should I keep this up?
The sex with her is awesome 'cause she's open for pretty much anything and she's into BDSM. She's 3 years older than me and she just wants freedom on the part of being with others while we have the benefits thing.

What would you do?
Tonight she's coming again and I'm thinking If I may say this is the last time or not. It just bugs me, 'cause I don't wanna be with other girls right now and she's just enough. But tell me, what are your visions of a friend with benefits? Is it okay for you If everybody's doing everything with others too while having this or what? I just want different opinions, to compare and to get a conclusion 'cause I'm on the edge. I mean, I want this to continue 'cause the sex is great with her, compared to the old partners I've had, but I want to end it 'cause of the other things she has on her mind, like that she wants to do a threesome with 2 other guys next month.

Opinions?
If the topic is not for this part of the forum or not good at all, please feel free to delete or move it where it belongs.
Thanks in advance for your opinions.

-Vic
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Old 01-31-2014
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Damn those feelings are getting in the way but I think she made it clear she wants freedom to do what she wants. She definitely doesn't feel the same way about you. You should explain to her how you feel though. Fuck it, why not, right? Just have fun man cuz nothing is forever.

This girl I was dating for a year fell off the side of the planet. Literally...one day it was, "I love you" and "I miss you." to nothing, no responses to my calls or texts. It's been 2 months now of no contact. All I got from her in those two months was a text saying, "I've been very busy, sorry" All I can do...it let go. Clearly, I felt something that she didn't. Nothing I can do, except call her maybe once a month but I feel like a fucking tard doing that but...stupidity tries.

Relationships revolve around loyalty, mutual feelings, and honesty. Don't confuse great sex with love. Also, an STD is not worth it.
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Old 02-01-2014
GCharles GCharles is offline
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Default I agree

I think no1000 hits the nail on the head. Tell her what you've written here, if she feels the same way good news, if not, then at least you know and can move on and, importantly, Let It Go! It is a very hard thing to do but it's much better than devoting a stupid amount of your time and energy thinking about her rather than moving on and living your life.

Starting to sound like an agony aunt column here lol! Good luck though whatever happens.
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Old 02-01-2014
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Quote:
Originally Posted by GCharles View Post
... Starting to sound like an agony aunt column here lol! Good luck though whatever happens.
Well put. For those of you unfamiliar with the term "agony aunt," it's what the Brits call an advice column.
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Old 04-02-2014
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LadyboyJerker LadyboyJerker is offline
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Thanks for the answers.

Writing 2 months forward and the situation is as follows:
1. I got over her for only 2-3 days. Was hard in the first week 'cause I was seeing (and still) her in the university but now I completely don't give a fuck.
2. Just about at the end of March I managed to get in bed with another one, just for one night only. Which was a good decision and really it was with no feelings at all. Not even a spark, lol. That was the good part.

So, I moved forward.
Just to let you know about the case.
Thanks for the advises which were sane compared to me back then.
-Vic
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  #6  
Old 04-05-2014
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Good for you!
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