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#1
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anybody else embarassed to like ladyboys ?
I wonder if any other members here have the same issues that I have . I have a number of friends living in Pattaya. I feel obligated, if I am to keep their friendship, to act like I only like girls. I must act disdainful of guys that seek ladyboys. I worry that the few times that I have taken a ladyboy from Stringfellows, or Pook Bar for instance that it will get back to them. It kind of reminds of me of playing Craps in Vegas. Your best odds after the first roll is to be a Don't Better. You stand in the corner, quiet, while everyone else is screaming and having a good time. The shooter glares at you for daring to bet against him. That's how I feel when Im looking for a ladyboy.
Even taking the ladyboy back to the hotel gives me the creeps. Perhaps thais are in fact totally non judgemental about such things, but it appears that to be with the IN CROWD, you bring a lady back to the hotel at night, not a Lady Boy. I wish I could look at my experiences overseas as landing on MARS. Im going to another planet, its just a dream, just relax and enjoy, but I cant completely relax. |
#2
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Of all the reasons nice T-gurls can't meet some nice guys,,,,,add this to the list.
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#3
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I had a similar problem when I visited Pattaya with some work mates. We had adjoining or very close rooms so I was to embarrassed to take a Ladyboy back. I had a great time and met some really nice girls but was secretly itching to meet a ladyboy.
I think next time I will go by myself, still reckon I be embarrassed to take a ladyboy back, thinking everyone is looking at me. I'll get over it though as long as I don't meet anyone I know. |
#4
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Do what you like man...If your ''friends'' don't approve your sexual preferences it's their problem.Not yours.
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#5
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Hey,
Screw it man. I've been in Pattaya for nearly a month with a beautiful lb from the Philippines and other than lots of admiring looks from passers by all is normal. If your mates are so against the third sex probably half of them secretly want to try dating them selves. Go for it and enjoy!!!!! |
#6
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Not just there
I think what you describe is common every where. It is nice that people are more accepting than in the past but i belive most people would still not feel comfortable admitting an attraction to a transgender person. I think one of the reasons it is a favorite talk show topic is that there is more hidden interest than most would be willing to admit.
POA |
#7
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Please don?t pay attention to what your ?friends? say. They don?t sound like much of an ?in? crowd to me. I have always been under the impression that Thailand was very ?nonjudgmental? when it came to transsexuals. Perhaps someone with more experience than me such as Hank, ila, or smc could shed some light on this. My feeling is that you have nothing to be embarrassed about. Aguy and Bisatinlover are 100% correct. Maybe it?s time to find some new friends.
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#8
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You can find discrete Katoeys here in Pattaya. You have been here before so you know not to pick one up off the street. We met some fellows from Oz last week and we commented on the gold chain and cross he was and suggested he keep it in the hotel. We saw him the next day and a ladyboy dad snatches off his neck. The police charged him 400 baht foe an english translation of the report. This is quite common here.
Best of luck to you and don't mind your friends. |
#9
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Quote:
Hey zoomrolf, it really shouldn't matter what your "friends" say or think it's your life and if they can't or won't accept it then they aren't true friends. |
#10
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'friends'
Like it or not, when we travel, we need 'friends'. Unfortunately, in the western world, to have mates, we have a protocol, a hierarchy, a standard for acceptance. Being male, macho, tough, liking girls and disdaining gay people is unfortunately unavoidable in the 'real world'. Yes it stinks, but it is what it is.
Its kind of like being an Athiest here, which I am. You cant admit it or you are ostracized. To fit it you have to give up part of yourself. Everybody does. I was really hoping, that when I came to the New World, Thailand, that I could leave this insanity behind. However, my mates, who live in Asia, have not entirely given up their Puritan thinking. So I guess I will occaisionally take a girl which is fine and when I hanker for a ladyboy, I will skulk around, in the shadows. |
#11
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I wouldn't have a problem admitting my interest if I actually found one
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#12
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With all due respect, and I mean that, I think the issue here is the understanding of what it means to be a "friend." A genuine friend wouldn't be the cause of any of what zoomrolf describes in his posts in this thread. Thus, the only conclusion ones can draw are either that a) these are not friends, but marginal acquaintances (in which case, zoomrolf must decide whether having them is more important than living as he pleases), or b) zoomrolf's embarrassment has its source in zoomrolf's own inhibitions, and the "friend" problem is, in essence, a cover.
I pass no judgment on which it might be, given that I do not know any of the actors involved, and I pass no judgment on the choices made as a result. |
#13
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spectrum
Perhaps 'friend' is indeed not the word for my contacts in Thailand. Never the less, to travel alone is sometimes boring and in some cases dangerous.
For anyone who travels a great deal, it is good to have 'contacts' who can be there should you have legal or medical issues. I will concede, that these are not really 'friends'. |
#14
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I have never felt embarrassed while walking with a ladyboy friend. On the contrary, it makes me proud to be with such a sweet girl.
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#15
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Those are some very shallow, closed minded people. I don't know anyone who would speak out against being gay and certainly could never stomach being in the company of homophobes, sexists, racists, hateful people etc... A huge amount of guys secretly love transwomen. Surely their disdain is a mask; at least for some of them. Throw caution to the wind, open up and see what happens. Worst that will happen is you certainly will end up with better friends.
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#16
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Proud
You should never be embarrassed about who you are or who you are with. I've never had anytime for closed minded or bigoted people.
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#17
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If so, why do you care what others think regarding who you shag / date / marry. I'd suggest you get some better friends, though in truth, that's not necessary. They are your friends and they like you for who you are. They'll likely be fine about who you date. My parents took 5 years!.... FIVE YEARS!!! to tell my very elderly (late 80's) godparents about my transition. {They specifically requested me to not to tell me godparents, directly} I pointed out that other than both godparents dying in a car crash, together, one of them WOULD LEARN of my transition at the other godparents funeral or if I die first, at my funeral. Not a good time to learn. After parents told them, my godparents were very chilled and have been more communicative and closer to me, than for many years. Don't pre-guess other peoples reaction to you being a Trans attracted man. It shows you to be an individual who lives outside the box. That's a good thing. |
#18
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I used to be
But I am so turned on by the prospects of it. I just want to try. Who knows. Maybe I'll love it.
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#19
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You think it's embarrassing and intimidating to take a transwoman back to your hotel? Well put yourself in her shoes for a moment. Only rewind a few years. Rewind to that first time going out en femme. There's a good chance she is a bit awkward those first months and years-- a lifetime of presenting male isn't overcome in one bold step. Just because you want to be a ma'am doesn't mean you won't still frequently be called sir. You walk down the street or step on a public bus for the first time as a female-- and all you feel is the fire of eyes burning into your flesh. The stares of condemnation and judgment and being "had."
But you keep pressing on. You keep doing it. Maybe not full-time. Maybe here and there at first. But you trudge on, and slowly you get better. And part of getting "better" has NOTHING to do with how you look, how "passable" you are, or whether people address you as a sir or a ma'am. It has to do with perception, attitude, and confidence. You learn that you're really not as important as you once fashioned yourself to be. In a wacky world-- yes, maybe people give you a casual glance. But in 9 times out of 10, it's not the malicious "stare" you once thought it to be. People in general have better things to worry about than YOU. Why would a lowly trans person occupy so much of their mental real estate? I think you could learn a thing or two from a trans person. But sadly, until you do, I don't think you're worthy of one. |
#20
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Embarrassed - NO
I don't know if embarrassed is how I would choose to describe how I feel. Like many things in life there is a stigma attahced to the things we choose to involve ourselves. Some of those stigmas are self imposed, others imposed socitally. I have been a transgender admirer for several years and have only come to terms recently with what that means to me. The bottom line is that bigotry isn't dead and those who are transgendered and those of us who admire them are feared because of what society doesn't know. Some of the sweetest, most sincere, caring people I have met in my 48 years are transgendered. I am no more embarassed by them than I am to be with them. Out of fear for what people will think of me and what it could mean to my business reputation I choose to keep my relationships "quiet". I live for the day that my friends are accepted like anyone else is in life. Embarrassed, no - sad for my friends and angry that I am too weak to openly fight for them, yes.
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#21
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#22
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I used to be really insecure about liking t-girls, but I've grown to be accepting of it and I will openly admit it, not that many people come asking. The thing for me is I absolutely love a gorgeous woman with a cock between her legs. However, I also like normal women as well. Now guys don't do anything for me neither does a t-girl that looks too masculine, and that confuses some people. Ultimately for me I see t-girls as women just like any other woman so I don't have a reason to be embarrassed.
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#23
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Embarrassed no but a little nervous yes and here's why
Fellow members no way I'm Embarrassed to date a transgender woman/or a transgender girl but i will however admit that I'm a little nervous about dating a transgender woman/or a transgender girl because of these reasons i never date a transgender woman/transgender girl before and whenever and when and if I put myself out there dating again and when and if any of my friends and/or if any of my family find out my girlfriend have a penis or if they become nosy like some people are since some people are so nosy and they found out on their own and if I already know from the start that she have a penis and I don't care even though I'm a straight guy.
And like i said on one of my questions what if any of my friends and/or any of my family finds out about her that she have a penis and i already know from the start if i ever date a transgender woman and they told me that she have a penis should i tell them i already know/knew that about her that she have a penis,should i let her decide if she wants them to know or if she wants to tell them and if none of the above then how should i respond to them if they are talking to me and tell me about what they found out about my girlfriend since like i said some people are so nosy if you know how nosy some people can become . |
#24
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#25
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And that's also i agree with you it's her decision to make plus if they told me about her and i already know from the start way before they told me and i don't even care even though like i said I'm a straight guy and i completely agree it's her decision to make and don't worry i let her decide on who she wants to tell or if she wants me to tell them i already know from the start yep from day 1. And don't worry like i said i gladly say it again I'll defend my girlfriend/wife if i did have someone,I'll defend people who i love and I'll defend people who i care about and I'll also defend myself if i have to sorry for a long reply and thanks for the response . Last edited by lordscott; 07-22-2014 at 07:25 PM. |
#26
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T-girls, Ladyboys, Femboys, etc. Friends or not, I jump at the chance to spend some time with these lovely people. I live in Southern California (OC) and with the Asian population that we have here, you'd thing it would be easy and maybe it is, I just haven't figured it out yet. LOL |
#27
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To SMC
Your comments do, indeed, impart that you have made a judgment. |
#28
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