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Old 12-07-2016
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JamieTS JamieTS is offline
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Default I Know this Thread is a Little Old But...

I am a true believer in conversion therapy. There are way too many closed minded assholes that need to be converted to human beings.

Conversion therapy is bullshit. It is nothing more than trying to brainwash people into bending to their ideals of societal norms. Screw societal norms. According to Carl Jung we are either part of the masses just like cattle being led to the slaughter house. I go farther in that we are solitary individuals that are living our own lives, no matter how hard it may be, like Cougars. No pun intended even though I am a trans Cougar at times.

Psychologically it is a dilemma. Do you want to be a part of the herd? Or do you want to be and individual? If you want to be an individual then you have to be strong and totally convicted that you are a special individual.

Conversion therapy is torture to us. Too many LGBTs have been tortured to the point of "Fuck it. I would rather die than be someone that I am not." It is nothing more than torture, plain pure and simple. You can shape a diamond but it is still a diamond and unfortunately these people that believe in conversion therapy think more of diamonds than they do the human psyche or a human life. Or even a human's happiness and self expression. I say Fuck Them.

I have experienced something like this since my mother was hardcore Christian. I got prayed over when I decided I liked Baby dolls and Barbie's more than Hot Wheels and cars. She was pissed when a doctor suggested that I shave my legs, underarms and body hair due to hyperhidrosis. Ok I lied to her because I was a girl and old enough for Doctor Patient Privilege. Holy Shit. I felt like a Jewish Prisoner in a concentration camp when younger because my parents dictated that I had to have a boy's haircut. Barber shops suck for me and I still have anxiety and depression seeing a Barber's Pole going around and around. To this day I hate the fuck out of candy canes. Red and white and twisted. Maybe that is where my hair fantasy come in. Especially being submissive. I would never do it though other than an undercut.

When I started dating boys then my mom had a shit fit. I did grow my hair long thanks to the eighties and playing guitar in a hair cover band. That also allowed me to wear makeup even in school, skimpy clothes and so on. We couldn't wear shorts but I be damned if I didn't have skinny jeans, women' snakeskin boots and short shorts that showed just the right amount of belly.

Oh my fucking god. I can't even OMFG it. I got prayed for even though I didn't go to church. I got told so many times that I was going to burn in hell for playing that "Devil's Music". My answer always was, "Well fucking preacher, I am a girl too so I will go faithfully and I will see you there you small minded son of a butch. How many children did you molest today or think of molesting today or ever. I have never thought of stealing someone's innocence." BTW that same preacher that my mom loved and admired so much felt me up when I was young and getting dunked under the water. It was not a fucking mistake. I was 10. Maybe if I was young like 4 or 5 it may be false memories. But at 10 with a fucking Christian robe on and a finger sticking in my ass? That is something you don't forget. I can't say I didn't like it because it was actually being penetrated and feeling open. LOL I actually stuck my own finger there way before. Yes I am a tranny. I am a shemale. I have been called gay because the place I lived didn't even know what trans was.

I went to prom dressed as sexy as I could fucking get. Full on makeup, sexy clothes, a pair of customized high heel snake skin boots because my band played the prom. My BF from another school was exit right. We left after the gig and partied. I went to his prom in full prom dress, makeup and heels. That was my prom, not the one I had a gig at my own school.

I won't lie because it sux being a shemale or tranny. But thank God for the guys that are willing to have a relationship with us and accept us. I can not tell you guys enough or even relay the appreciation and respect I have for Ya'll. I mean I could have listened to my mom and dad but I am my own person. I could have let her church try to change me or make me feel bad about myself but churches do not represent the true Christ, God or the Universe and definitely not Genetics. My genes fucked me along with DES. I have XXY chromosomes so I am more female than male but somewhere in between. It is nature. So I am natural. If no one can accept that then screw them.

Conversion therapy is nothing, in my opinion, other than Nazi Brainwashing according to societies normality's. I am not normal I am Jamie and no one else is like me. I happen to be a trans woman but fuck it. It is something that is deep inside me on a genetic and misused medical level due to DES. Without the synthetic hormones pumped into my mom I may have been a miscarriage. My mom prayed really hard to have a daughter and she did. Just a daughter with a penis. I would have like that she would have understood but she was wearing the blinders of religious convictions and listening to just as many fucked up ideals that I have.

The Psyche is the Psyche. In ancient Greece the Psyche is actually the Soul. Jungian Psychology is rather interesting but Freudian Psychology is nothing more, in my opinion, than a cocaine fueled mind from Sigmund. To me Carl Jung connected more the subconscious to the Universe, creator and one another way more than Sigmund Freud,

But it is really sad when someone feels the need to take their own life when they feel they can't live up to what society expects of them. Screw society. I would rather deal with the "freaks, goths, wild ones, and others that live outside the fringes of society" than the lemmings that will follow other off a cliff. Or the cattle getting led freely to the slaughter house.

Society will convert itself. We let it go and morph itself. Minds are opening more and more with everyday, every decade, every century, every millennia and so on. Cultures change. I saw a show today from Nat Geo that showed gender roles in the Ex Soviet Union. That is fine. I want my man to be a masculine man but even though I have a penis I look really good in high wedges and short shorts in the summer time. I can go braless but on rough roads I have to wear a bra or OMG I hurt after the trip. Well I really need to wear a bra all the time. Has anyone ever heard of booby do? We all know what a Dickey do is. If not that is where you stomach sticks out more than you dickey do. Well my boobs stick out more than my dickey do. Yes I cover my nipples with electrical tape in an x to keep them from poking out in a T shirt.

Oh My God I talk way too much.
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