Quote:
Originally Posted by virtualflowe
I've been with several escorts but do wish I was in a relationship with a transexual, which ideally would turn into "friends-with-benefits".
I've watched documentaries and some Youtube of people going through transition, that transexuals have serious mental issues. Since I've never been in a real relationship with one, I can't say how true this might be.
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Yeah the first part? We are like other women. Friends with benefits works when we may be a little younger and drinking a little too much but... In the end though, friends with benefits is nothing but a booty call ( literally with us
) when no one else better is around or after the clubs have done last call. We do look for more intimate and lasting relationships like most women do. Now if you pay to play that is a little different. That is business. And we may actually use you as a "fill my booty call" too. Remember that Porn is not a real life situation but more or less a fantasy situation. So I have never in real life had a pool guy hit on me and I automatically spread my legs for him and had sex next to the pool. I mean most of the Transexual porn stars abd or porn stars in general have boyfriends, girlfriends and or married even. Last I knew of even Bailey Jay was married to a guy.
The second part though baby. We have been through some hellacious shit in our lives. It is OK to be gay now. It is OK for a woman to be a butch lesbian and wear guy clothes. But try being born a man and a trans woman dressing and presenting as a female with people that knew you were born a male. Growing up everyone thought I was gay or a little bit of a sissy but... I lost all my friends except one and most of my family even though I have some really butch and a couple of trans men cousins. But the lesbians and the trans men are more accepted than I am just because we live in a paternalistic society. I mean who the hell would want to be a woman when men have it so made? It is not something that we can control and our hands are tied but it is who we are. It is way easier if you can do like I do and say "Fuck Society and the norms." I figured out long ago who I was and I tried to go the other way and failed miserably. I make no apologies and am not ashamed of it. It is just as big apart of who I am as an individual as the color of my eyes, hair, skin and so on. And yes I lost a lot of old friends but made new ones in the process. I lost a lot of family but still have a few family that could give a shit less. And particularly I could care less, because I am who and what I am and I will be damned if I let anyone make me feel bad about it. But.... there are a lot of us that do and feel guilty for expressing ourselves. Maybe it is because we feel we let others down. Maybe it is because certain socially accepted perceptions of ourselves do not coincide with what society will accept. When we can't feel like we can be ourselves without letting our mother's, father's, friend's and family's expectations then it has a way of effecting us mentally. This is in no way limited to transsexuals but everyone else too. It is more predominate with us because of societal perceptions of normalcy between the genders. Society understands sex way more than gender. We like what we like when it comes to sexuality but when it comes to gender we are stuck between genitalia. Then you go into more of a psychological aspect between both parties.
Sorry for the long post but that sweetie is why so many of us have mental issues. There is also another aspect of it and that is that we all wish we could choose to be what gender we are. I will never be a cis woman. I will always be a trans woman. That doesn't make me less feminine though. Same with the trans men. Buck Angel has bigger balls than a lot of the men I dated and he has a vagina.
But some of us are so psychologically damaged either by hiding it so long or the shit we had to put up with. I mean Jazz Jennings puts herself out there as a trans girl and idiots talk shit about a teen trans girl that most people would find offensive. She can pass and I am sure that the money is/was good with the show but she is a trans girl that will grow into a trans woman. She knows this and doesn't hide it. So the mental issues usually come with not fully accepting it and a sort of internal guilt because of the environment you grew up in and refusing to totally accept who you are. She truly is a brave girl.
Again sorry for the long post but it is kind of hard to explain where the mental anguish comes from without trying to explain it.