Guys what's with the bickering?
We all have the stuff that excites us, and that is as individual as each of us.
On one hand, I get what Hank is saying. Trans*women, particularly Asian Trans* are HIGHLY sexualized to the point of being a fetish. Hank's assessment isn't so far off the mark for a number of guys who make a couple trips to Thailand each year, find a bar girl, indulge their fetish and bugger off back to their life with no investment (aside from the cash one) in the lives of the girls who fill their fantasy. To these guys we are just a diversion and a guilty secret.
On the other, finding Asian Trans* with particular physical features willing to dress/act/play in a way that can be erotic is a perfectly valid thing to bring up.
Both of you have personal relationships with Asian trans*women. This should give you more commonality than contention. I think if you guys can get past the assumptions and defensiveness you could likely have some good conversations.
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