Well.. there is some amount of "settling" in every relationship. We all have a perfect partner that exists in the yummy recesses of our minds and only there. So, really our perfect partner is a combination of fantasy and experience. Knowing what bits are crucial for a relationship and what can be negotiated will probably be the key to something special.
I also don't think it is unreasonable to have physical attributes that are important. People have physical attractions for a reason and to discount that as "shallow" or "vapid" isn't fair (not that I have seen this in the thread, but it could go that direction). That said, having a realistic expectation for how real people look without the benefit of perfect lighting, makeup, and photoshop will likely be a good idea.
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