[GRH]

I know that a fair amount of what is posted here is the objectification of transwomen, and I'm actually not going to bash that fact. I also know that many transgendered women end up working in the sex industry as a means of making income. But the images of t-girl sexuality is somewhat distorted by the rather one dimensional view that pornography presents. Surely, some transgirls are raging and exotic shecock sex fiends, but I think not nearly at the levels that many people fantasize about.

I say this for two obvious reasons and the first has been discussed with some frequency around here. Quite simply, taking hormones often has the effect of shrinking the girls penis, testicles, etc. This can also lead to a lowered libido, lower sperm counts, difficulty achieving erection. This is all pretty straight forward stuff that can be gleaned from the medical literature on hormone replacement therapy.

The aspect that I have seen considered much less frequently is the psychology of a transwoman. I myself and a pre-op or non-op, but more as a matter of cost than a desire to keep my plumbing in tact. SRS can run over a hundred grand, and quite frankly, even if I qualified for the surgery today and had the money in hand I would have to think LONG about whether I'd ever want to hand that much money over to a surgeon. But, the ability to climax or even have sex period really doesn't factor very much into my psychology.

To be perfectly honest, I've thought about standing outside of a hospital ER with a shotgun and blowing everything off. I'd be right where medical professionals could take care of me, and the surgery would be reconstructive trauma reduction as opposed to a non insurance-covered SRS. But if there was very little left to recover, perhaps I'd leave looking more like a hermaphrodite and less like a ladyboy??? I say this not to make anyone worry, as I don't think I could SERIOUSLY do that, but I point out this thought to illustrate my point...

I DON'T LIKE having a penis. I don't think I'd be happier per say if I had a vagina, but I find a dick to be this protruding, nasty matter of maleness. As a result, I don't like fucking with it. I don't want to stick it in anything because that just feels too macho-manly for my pschology. I much prefer being penetrated because that makes me feel feminine. I like self facials for the same reason, but I DON'T like to see my penis. I will of course admit that stimulation there feels good (oral, etc.), I just wish I could receive the stimulation without feeling dirty and mannish. I don't know, I think I'm a much more asexual creature with a much lower libido than many of the admirers on this site might believe possible.