Telling your partner of your love for shemales
 

Telling your partner of your love for shemales, whether its your wife, fiancee or girlfriend, is it a good idea?

I'm thinking of it. :confused:

Anyone got any experiences of doing so?

:cool:

I think 90% of the people will say you are weird. Probably only 10% people think this is normal.

Sadly...

Before I truly realized my love for trans*women I actually played out fantasies with my x-wife... needles to say she was as open minded as I am.

Personally I think it's always a good idea to come out of the closet, unfortunately 90% of the world tends to disagree with me.

But what's the worst that can happen? She'll slap you, call you a freak, and leave you... but would she then be worth holding onto anyway?

Your choice, my man.

H

TOUGH decision. Of course, as others will say, it really depends on your relationship and the type of person she is. In my situation, I never could dream of doing such a thing, until it was slapped in my face after my wife caught me with some evidence of a meeting with a Tgurl (some text messages).

End result? We are still together, she hopes that my "fetish" has been put behind us, or at least relegated to only thoughts and no action, and we both sense the "big elephant in the room" that's always there because we have yet to address the 'why' of my interests.

I hope it comes some day, when we can have an open and honest discussion about it, but it has not happened yet.

So, please be careful and hope that, if you want to stay with your wife, that she is open and kind and forgiving should you decide to say something.

I think my wife got the idea when I put a 9" strapon on her ;)

Tanks for the responces, i'd still like to hear nore tho

i once told my girlfriend about my love for shemales and she wasn't suprised in the slightest...i think she already knew cause she has a cock and i have sex with her all the time;)

Well I had a girlfriend and it was getting quite serious, but I had to find out if my attraction for transwomen was any more than just a sexual curiosity, so before committing I found a transwomen and spent a few days with her.

Pretty soon it was clear to me that I was never going to be satisfied with a genetic woman. Upon returning I told her (the genetic girl) and she was none to pleased. We ceased any intention to be more than friends.

So for those thinking they might be satisfied getting the best of both worlds, you may in fact discover that your partnership with a genetic girl may be on the way out and she may get a sense of this and feel insecure about satisfying you.

That said, everyone's different and it all may work out cozy. Still, while it may not work out, there is some comfort in being honest to oneself and to those we're close to.

i wish i can say it to my girlfriend but i don't know how she reacts ??
May be later i can say but we are newly together and need some time to say, i think !!! May be i will never say and live it secretly :yes: :innocent:

there was a period of time where i bought about 3 toys from online (all anal) for myself and i didnt say anything until they arrived - she saw them and was a little shocked. she knows i like playing with asses but wont let me play with hers and wont play with mine so im left to my own devices hence the reason i made the purchases. we talked about it and somehow the conversation made a turn and she said something like, well its not like you want me to have a cock right?

deny deny deny

from that point i knew i had to keep it to myself

I told my girlfriend early on in our relationship but was pressured as we were having problems in bed because ive spent so much of my life thinking and jerking off to tgirls.

She got upset, asked if i was gay and cried her eyes out for like half an hour. We managed to work it out but she thinks its all in the back of my head and im forgetting it. I have to hide my mass collection on my HD but she still sticks a dildo up my butt.

My wife has an idea. It's interesting because you are hearing more and more about transgendered people in the media. I always tell my wife about porn in general "I'm not the only person keeping the industry open." She says "She does not care where I get my appetite as long as I eat at home."

I have a polyamouric relationship in which BDSM plays an important part. Both my girls know that I like T-girls and what for. They are ok with it and I even might have a go if I really want to. It is very tempting! I also know it is not JUST t-girls that get me arroused. Both of my girls can pretty much make me crazy :)

Not yet
 

I haven't told my wife and I don't think she suspects. I'm quite sure I won't tell her either. I know her well enough to know that it would be the end. That in itself wouldn't be so awful, but I have a young daughter and I want to be in her life everyday. That's the main reason I'm still in this relationship. I dream daily of leaving and finally pursuing my dream of living with a transgendered girl.

My girlfriend knows and has accustomed to it. What else could she do? For me it's absolutely normal and she knows I'll never be against her loving a lesbi girl (though she's straight). I think it depends on everybody's relationship, on whether it's deep or not. And if your GF loves u, she'll understand, I'm pretty sure!
So c'mon think it all over and go ahead, guys, the truth is always better!

My wife knows all about my love of all things TS. She has posed for me in photo shoots wearing a strap-on under her panties, naked, etc. She thinks it's cute. She is Bi and has a girl lover (she would be considered the "femme"). Anyway, try to tell her about it - in this day and age, most women will be okay with it - if they like/love you enough, that is - make sure to woo her with a fine dinner, wine and gifts before telling her!

Girls don't react well to competition for their magic pussies

I've not been covering up the trails behind my internet use, and my wife soon tracked me down to this website.

Of course she doesnt know my user ID, but she knows I'm downloading pictures from this site, and she was puzzled.

So she asked me one day,

"Are you gay? Do you want to be fucked in the ass?"

And I said,

"May be, never tried so I don't know. Can I try?"

And she said,

"No way! It's dangerous, you know?"

---------------------------------------------------------

Now, I think there's a slice of hope in that. She didn't freak out, she didn't say,

"You do it and I'll kill you."

She was just... worried about the safety issue, which means if I can take care of that, then may be there's a chance.

---------------------------------------------------------

Some time after the first conversation, she asked me again,

"Why do you like TS?"

And I said I don't know. And she asked,

"Is it because you want to have sex with other people besides me, and you feel less guilty if you had sex with another male, rather than a female?"

And I said,

"Would it make you less angry if I had sex with a TS?"

And she said,

"No. I'll still be angry."

And I said,

"Honey, I'm just curious, that's all."

And that's where we stand right now.

Good luck WudLuv, hope it all works out for you. I really have no advice (not that you ask for any) as I'm not married and do not have a serious girlfriend.

Thanks, km1!

I wasn't going to ask, but I had to.

Seeing you're not married and don't have serious girlfriend, have you... ? ;)

Close to home...
 

Looks like this topic came up a while back but its still relevant for a few (many?) of us, myself included.

With my own situation it is unlikely that my wife would be receptive to my attraction to transsexuals, mostly due to her upbringing and partially due to just her own nature. In fact it would most likely be the beginning of the end of our marriage if I brought it up.

While I would love to be open with my wife about it she wouldn't be able to take it - it doesn't mean that she doesn't love me or vice-versa.

The only thing I can say on this is that you have to use your own common sense, as people have pointed out before everyone's situation is different.

basic
 

In my opinion, honesty in a relationship is exceptionally important. I have a girlfriend and we've been dating for several years and I've told her about my various interests, including Tgirls. She isn't into it at all and probably wishes I wasn't so much, but I'm glad she knows. I would never be able to keep anything like this from her. I tell her everything of importance.

That being said, I can see how it can be different for others. Some people here are married and would have come across Tgirls after being married. Obviously, if they had gotten into Tgirls before marriage, they may have been able to talk about it with their partner. After being married it changes things, as a marriage could potentially be ruined if someone found out their partner was into Tgirls. Of course, it all depends on how open-minded one is and what sort of upbringing they had etc. It isn't easy telling someone you love something like this. It can be scary not knowing how they'll feel, how it will affect them and how it will affect the relationship.

chelsea, my advice would be to let your partner know. I'm not sure how close you and your partner are, but I believe honesty is always the best answer. If you do let her know, please let us know how it went. All the best!

I want, someday, to be married to a transwoman or at the very least in a LTR. The original question then becomes rather moot as my wife/partner will be trans and she will obviously know of my desire for transwomen. I do know that my someday cannot happen soon enough for me.

LMFAO!!! would love my mrs to strap one of them on and jam me, but unfortunatly she isnt likely to understand my fetish, lifes a bitch

I told my wife. She was pretty understanding and wasn't really shocked by it. If this woman is your partner for life you should be able to tell her anything and everything. As long as she is secure in your relationship there should never be an issue.

lucky me my gf is a shemale so I guess I don`t have to clarify that I like shemales

I am married & have 2 young children. My lov for shemales came up in the last 12 months, in saying that I am only with my wife to be with my children & we don't have a happy marriage. If I did tell her that would be the end of any relationship. But I do have a freind from Russia who is 28 yo female who is absolutely georgous, we have phone sex all the time & swap dirty pics. I told her of my love for shemales & she wants to come & visit me so we can do some shemales together!
I can't wait as this would be the ultimate for me!
She is the only one who knows my secret...

i was busted
 

....i have been busted twice by my fiancee with both pics and vids on my hard drive..she freaked out..told me i was sick and weird..moved out for 2 weeks and cried on her pals shoulder the whole time....but i was like..well at least the truth is out now...

..2 yrs on..she opens up her asshole to me all the time;)..because she believes i like fucking the ass....which i do..

..3yrs on and she took it a notch higher by first sticking her finger(s) in my ass as we had sex..but also bought butt plugs to stick in my ass as we did it..

...i look back and i am happy that i was busted because it also brought out the freak in her,and i love it...and believe me...i realize day by day what a freak she is..she loves risky,public domineering sex...she cums and gushes like never beofre...and i love it!:inlove:...and i love her:heart:..she is a GG.

..being busted somehow made my life and sex life better....

but i still love TS's ..always will!

It's as bad as telling your partner that you crossdress I believe. Which have broke up marriages or turn out to be fine both ways. Just hide it if the other person is really up tight. I know a lot of Americans like that.

My partner knows and she doesn't like me watching TS orientated porn

She accepts its but doesn't like it

Top post....we like

No, she wouldn?t understand it. She would accept (I believe) a "normal" gay orientation, but not my longing for shemales.

She's not my partner yet, but my lady knows of my love for transgender women. She wholeheartedly approves because she is a beautiful sweet transgender lady.:inlove:

Dont do it unless you have to i wouldnt reccomend it

And I'm so happy to be the lucky lady. In fact, I'm thankful for everyday I think about you. And I obviously more than approve.:inlove::kiss:

I sincerely wish the both of you lots of happiness.:)

And I'm so thankful for you. :hug::inlove:

Isn't this where someone's supposed to say "get a room, already!" ;)

Sorry you're so jealous SMC.

No apology necessary. I'm not jealous, but happy for whatever is going on.

Hummm, I wonder where Ila is? :innocent:

I'm very happy for you my friend! :) :respect:

Thankyou. I am very happy and very thankful to have met such a sweet wonderful lady.:yes::)

This is something I live in fear of (my wife finding out). Before we were married I told her I was bisexual, but it was something she blocked out. Recently I've reminded her and its something that she doesn't like but has apparently accepted. I worry that finding out that I'm a casual crossdresser and that the only dicks I look at come paired with at least an attempt at looking (socially) standardly female would send her over the edge.

Reminding her that I'm bi has been exceptionally freeing, but I worry it will make me too bold. I could push too soon and tell her that every once in a while I like to wear her panties when she's not home. I'm thinking that's not such a good idea.

If that is your feeling, you are probably right.

I see two issues emerging in this thread. One pertains to the original question. The other has to do with crossdressing and related behavior. If you fall into the second category, I suggest you find a way to share your interest with your partner. Eventually she will find out. Especially if you are wearing her stuff. Maybe it will turn out to be something the two of you can share--many couples do--and if not you will know that you need to find someone else to share your desires. If your crossdressing is indicative of something deeper? then you need to explore that further and be true to who you are. :respect: Remember you are among friends here!

As for the original topic of this thread. It really depends on you. Are you happy with your current partner? Do you really love this person? Are you happy with your life? Are you sincere about wanting a relationship with a transwoman? Do you actually know any transwomen?

It is generally NOT a good idea to tell your partner something that makes them feel less desirable to you: ?You know, honey, that Kelly Shore is really hot?? Unless of course you want to sleep on the couch. Or worse! To me this would essentially be the same as telling your partner you are having an affair or are gay. And do you want her to know that you spend all your time on the computer looking at porn? :innocent:

Some of you have suggested ?threesomes.? Congratulations if you are in a relationship that is that open--you have my admiration and respect. If that is the case then where is the problem with telling your partner? Unless your relationship is not really that ?open.?

Some of you have expressed the desire to be penetrated anally by a woman. There is such a thing called a ?strap on.? Maybe your wife or GF can be talked into using one on you (sorry, you?re on your own here).

Finally, many of you keep insisting that those of us who like transwomen are really ?gay.? My own feelings about this are well documented elsewhere on this forum but let?s consider it. I suspect some of us are. Or bi. That?s OK. There is nothing wrong with being gay. Suppose you are? Then you most likely aren?t going to be happy in your current heterosexual relationship and you are already having problems. My advice is to end it and find the person right for you.

:frown:Some get to play backstop,
others get to be homeplate.