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-   -   Intolerance (http://forum.transladyboy.com//showthread.php?t=353)

eliogabalo 10-17-2007 02:48 AM

Intolerance
 
My family-life has been a permanent fight against intolerance and prejudices. My father is an ultra-catholic who reputes all the differences dangerous for the society; my mother is not so superstitious but she's equally obtuse and intolerant.
The nicest thing my mother said about my sexuality was: "It's not your fault: you're ill". She usually says i'm a pervert and a dissolute. When my father knew my love for shemales he said: "Your mother told me something terrible" ( that's the most idiot sentence i've ever heard). At the moment i've broken all my relationships with my father and i'm looking for a permanent job what allows me to abandone definitivelly the house of my mother ( perhaps i'm very close to find one :)). Some parents are a disgrace. They can't understand that the love for a ladyboy can be so strong, tender and wonderful as the love for a girl. In my love for Luiza they see only illness and perversion. I find very hard to understand their attitude. During their marriage they were always unfaithful, till they got divorced, whereas i (the "depraved" son) love my girlfriend with all my love and will never cheat on her. This fact is paradoxical ... :confused:
I hope your family is a bit more open-minded ( and less idiot) as mine :)

PWM 10-17-2007 03:13 AM

I sympathise with you my friend. Society is full of such intolerance, from religion right down to the clothes you wear and the food you eat. It seems the majority of people are insecure when faced with anything that's different from what they know and expect. It's caused most of the wars in history and seems set to continue.
I guess when faced with intolerance there are three choices:
1. Fight it and try persuade your opponents of (at least) your right to your preference. I find this is usually a complete waste of energy. People who start with closed minds seldom open them.
2. Submit to peer pressure and either abandon your preferences or subvert them underground. I think many of us on this forum are forced to do this to a greater or lesser degree, depending on personal circumstances.
3. Simply ignore your critics and go do what pleases you. Obviously this is the ideal route - and it seems the one that you've been forced into - but one has to be in a very strong economic and social position to do this and it takes a lot of balls; it's a bit of a luxury for most of us, but it's the most liberating choice when you can do it.

Best wishes and keep it up (figuratively and literally)!

2WayStreet 10-17-2007 09:50 AM

I sympatise with you on your family situation. My advice is to do what you are happy and comfortable with.
DON"T WORRY, BE HAPPY

BlueRaven88 10-18-2007 01:29 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by eliogabalo (Post 5999)
My family-life has been a permanent fight against intolerance and prejudices. My father is an ultra-catholic who reputes all the differences dangerous for the society; my mother is not so superstitious but she's equally obtuse and intolerant.
The nicest thing my mother said about my sexuality was: "It's not your fault: you're ill". She usually says i'm a pervert and a dissolute. When my father knew my love for shemales he said: "Your mother told me something terrible" ( that's the most idiot sentence i've ever heard). At the moment i've broken all my relationships with my father and i'm looking for a permanent job what allows me to abandone definitivelly the house of my mother ( perhaps i'm very close to find one :)). Some parents are a disgrace. They can't understand that the love for a ladyboy can be so strong, tender and wonderful as the love for a girl. In my love for Luiza they see only illness and perversion. I find very hard to understand their attitude. During their marriage they were always unfaithful, till they got divorced, whereas i (the "depraved" son) love my girlfriend with all my love and will never cheat on her. This fact is paradoxical ... :confused:
I hope your family is a bit more open-minded ( and less idiot) as mine :)

lol man that sentence 'It's Not Your Fault: You're Ill' is the funniest damn thing ive ever heard/read. love of ladyboys isn't an illness it's just how we were born, same as homosexuality/heterosexuality/bisexuality aren't illnesses it's just how they were born. it never ceases to amaze me how some people (like your parents) can be so ignorant, narrow minded and overall, despicable.

i can sympathize with you on this. my father, while not an uber-catholic, is basically THE most prejudiced man i have ever met. if you can be against something, he's against it. inter-racial relationships, homosexuality, different religions, different races, tattoos, piercings - he hates them all. an example of how "traditional" he is - i got my left ear pierced when i was 8 years old, and my brother (who was 10 at the time) also got his pierced. my father, who drove us to get it done, called us homos all the way home. thank god he left when i was 10 haha. ironically now i have 2 earrings in both of my earlobes, and i had a labret ring for about a year.

my mother has said many times that she will always love her children no matter how they are so i can't really relate on that one, but she doesn't know i'm a 'paratrexual' (for explanation and definition of this head here: http://www.reneereyes.com/Webdocs/ad...ientation.html), but i doubt she will cut all ties with me when i tell her. my advice, like everyone else's in this thread, is just do what makes YOU happy, and damn everyone who says it's wrong

tgirl virgin 10-18-2007 08:16 AM

Don't expect family members to support you. They are not only close-minded, but are embarrassed about you. This is the way I see it: If your family cannot accept you the way you are, they are a piss-poor family, and you do not need them.

If it were me, I'd move away from them as soon as I could, and not look back.

I had a parent that was shunned, not because of anything in particular, but I think it was because she was prettier than the rest of the family. And they hated her for that.

Yet she wanted to have something to do with her family, because she had low self-esteem, and no friends. That was sad.

But, if a family accepts some people for who they are, bravo to them.

My mother asked me if I were gay, because I wanted to go to a friend's house all the time. It was not for gay reasons. We liked to get drunk, and party, but I guess my mother was jealous I had friends.

I never really considered wanting cock (I liked mine, but not anyone elses) but I always bought tons of girly magazines and masturbated 2 or more times a day. Then last year I saw a picture of a beautiful girl, with nice tits, and ass. But then I saw the cock. I grew to accept shemales. I still don't like men men. If they look masculine, or have hair on any parts except the head and crotch, I don't want it.

Sickness is a matter of opinion. However, child molestors are sick, and I'll tell you why: Children are too young to consent to sex, and are not ready for sex.

Sex is fine, between consenting adults of any combination of genders, as long as it's not in public. And as long as no one or no animal is harmed.

PS., I used to hate gays, and drag-queens, and mixed races. I used to be the biggest bigot on earth. But since I live in a glass house, I've learned not to throw stones. I do have SOME prejudices, but they are a lot less then they used to be.
I try to accept everyone, as long as they treat me and others decent. I don't care what they do, as long as they don't cause harm. But I would prefer people have sex in private, unless of course, I wanted to watch, then I'd want to join in, or at least masturbate. :)

eliogabalo 10-18-2007 11:25 AM

In my life i've known 2 different kinds of intolerance. The first kind hates all the differences and think they're perversions; the second kind confuses difference with illness and think we are sick.
The first kind of intolerance is typical of many moralists and of the "religious" people. The second is typical of some "good idiots", who always worry about you and always feel sorry for you.
The first kind of intolerance can be terrible, but the second is more dangerous and insidious, because it assumes the appareance of the compassion and of the pity. I think the second kind is even worse than the first. These idiots think you're ill only because you are "different" and more open-minded than they are. I'm not ill and don't want their stupid pity. Love for shemales is a wonderful feeling, bordering on the human aspiration to beauty, completeness and perfection. Homophobia and stupidity are the real illnesses.

BlueRaven88 10-18-2007 10:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by eliogabalo (Post 6130)
In my life i've known 2 different kinds of intolerance. The first kind hates all the differences and think they're perversions; the second kind confuses difference with illness and think we are sick.
The first kind of intolerance is typical of many moralists and of the "religious" people. The second is typical of some "good idiots", who always worry about you and always feel sorry for you.
The first kind of intolerance can be terrible, but the second is more dangerous and insidious, because it assumes the appareance of the compassion and of the pity. I think the second kind is even worse than the first. These idiots think you're ill only because you are "different" and more open-minded than they are. I'm not ill and don't want their stupid pity. Love for shemales is a wonderful feeling, bordering on the human aspiration to beauty, completeness and perfection. Homophobia and stupidity are the real illnesses.

i agree. religion is 100% construed by mankind anyway. there is no proof as to what they say is really what god is saying. if shemales were so wrong then god wouldnt have made people that way, and would not have made them attractive and desirable to us. shemales are the ultimate partners in my opinion. they have all the good aspects of both genders and very few of the bad aspects. let the shemale revolution begin!!

padeligne 10-19-2007 01:04 AM

i am no lover of religion, but let us (the non-religious people) not get smug. atheists can be as intolerant as any fanatical religious maniac. a short look at the 20th century says enough. to be truly tolerant is not easy. every day, every moment we have to check our attitude to others.

eliogabalo 10-19-2007 02:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by padeligne (Post 6182)
i am no lover of religion, but let us (the non-religious people) not get smug. atheists can be as intolerant as any fanatical religious maniac. a short look at the 20th century says enough. to be truly tolerant is not easy. every day, every moment we have to check our attitude to others.

My friend, this is not matter of religion and atheism ( i'm a neo-pagan and my God is the Nature :yes:). The problem is the intolerance of the religious people towards all the sexual differences. The priestly caste always persecuted the "deviants", and we, from their point of view, ARE deviants. I live in Italy and ensure you that the catholic church, in her large majority, hate the homosexuals and transsexuals in a terrible way. And even worse are the religious people who repute us ill and want to "cure" us. You say we have to be tolerant, but our opponents are not tolerant. We have to fight hardly for our rights.
"Conformity" and intolerance are the worst enemies of happyness. Look at some islamic countries, where homosexuals suffer the death sentence. We must defend our happiness against the priestly caste. :censored:

BlueRaven88 10-19-2007 05:11 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by eliogabalo (Post 6183)
i'm a neo-pagan and my God is the Nature :yes:

dang hippy!!! :p just kidding man if thats your belief then i respect it :respect:

i agree. the argument is not about religions. i mean i am partly catholic (raised with 1 or 2 catholic beliefs but was never baptised and never went to church), and i love shemales. im not just catholic though - my beliefs are of an unclassified religion. i believe that, while god watches over us all and loves us all, s/he doesn't interfere with the daily workings of our world at all. i believe every single so called 'phenomenon' in the world has a scientific and factual explanation. take, for example, the fish that rained from the sky. it's simple science. it was hot, alot of water was evaporated and so were fish eggs that were in that water, the eggs hatched and the fish grew in the clouds, then they fell out of the clouds when it rained.

but im getting off track. this isn't a debate on religions or beliefs. this is a discussion on the narrow mindedness, ignorance, and stubbornness of people who refuse to believe that what we feel for shemales is completely natural and normal

eliogabalo 10-19-2007 03:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BlueRaven88 (Post 6186)
dang hippy!!! :p just kidding man if thats your belief then i respect it :respect:

i agree. the argument is not about religions. i mean i am partly catholic (raised with 1 or 2 catholic beliefs but was never baptised and never went to church), and i love shemales. im not just catholic though - my beliefs are of an unclassified religion. i believe that, while god watches over us all and loves us all, s/he doesn't interfere with the daily workings of our world at all. i believe every single so called 'phenomenon' in the world has a scientific and factual explanation. take, for example, the fish that rained from the sky. it's simple science. it was hot, alot of water was evaporated and so were fish eggs that were in that water, the eggs hatched and the fish grew in the clouds, then they fell out of the clouds when it rained.

but im getting off track. this isn't a debate on religions or beliefs. this is a discussion on the narrow mindedness, ignorance, and stubbornness of people who refuse to believe that what we feel for shemales is completely natural and normal



Not more kidding than the belief in a "personal" God who always looks at us, my friend ! I adore REAL things ! :D. But let's abandon the religious issues ...
I'm quite optimistic about the problem of the intolerance against the sexual differences. I see great and important progresses in all the West-Europe.
Perhaps the intolerance of the idiots will move on others, different objectives.
The most important thing is we all are proud of our choices and keep fighting for our rights. :yes:

tlover 10-19-2007 07:10 PM

I grew up without my father my mother brought me up alone.
I have great respect for her, but she had me when she was older and is of the older generation and she has many inbuilt predujices towards race and sexuality.
I think a lot of older people have this drummed into them from an early age through fear and ignorance of something different and see homosexuality as dangerous and abnormal.
We have had many arguments over the years about gays and race but as shes got older and wiser she has become a little more understanding and tolerant.

If she knew of my liking for shemales i think she would not understand and be upset over it, but i know she would not shun me and would eventually accept it.
However elio, as i think you know my liking for shemales dose not extend to waning to marry or live with one, I'm more interested in sexual adventure and it's not a major part of my life, so i don't see the need to upset her about it.

For you obviously it is different as you are very serious about your relationship and i think is a great shame your family will not accept this important part of your life.
This fear and intolerance has been passed down through the generations the world is full of hate and prejudice, people need to be educated.

Society is slowly changing and different sexual preference's are becoming more accepted, but its slow progress, in some places more than others.
If I'm honest this slow progress is in part due to millions of people like me, I'm ashamed to say.
To afraid to own up about there "unusual" sexual tastes, to frightened to speak out against the crowd or there peers, when sneers and jokes are made against homosexuals.
Over the years i have become little more brave in speaking up when race hate rears its ugly head, but i would have a very hard time coping with sneers and constant jokes from my friends and colleagues about my sexual desires.
So i guess that makes m a hypocrite and a coward too.

I have to say elio i admire your courage telling your intolerant family about your sexual preferences and for your determination do do exactly what you want in a very intolerant country.
It must be a very tough for you my friend.

If everybody admitted there true desires i belive homosexuality, bisexuality etc would make up an extremely large part of each community, but were all too afraid to come out.

As for religion, I'm an atheist, i belive religion is a big part of all that is wrong in this world, and religious people are some of the most hypocritical people you could meet.
Many church leaders chose to pick out and distort various religious beliefs for whatever is needed for their cause, be it war, intolerance of sexual preference or the division of various cultures or believes.

The poorest community in the world are seduced and sedated by the promise of everlasting heavenly paradise in the afterlife.
Believing their dire existence is a test provided by god and the focus of their plight taken away from the true culprits, corrupt governments, politicians, generals and churches.

Well that's just my opinion anyway, rant over with.

eliogabalo 10-20-2007 11:17 AM

Thanks for your nice words ! And don't feel too guilty ... we are all a bit responsible for the persistence of intolerance. You see, we have to fight against ALL the discriminations, and not only against the discriminations what damage us. This concept is very important, and i sometimes forget it :(.
We must defend ALL the differences ( not only sexuality but also race, colour of the skin, way of life, way of thinking ...). But we often worry only about our "little garden", as we in Italy say. I vote for a very little party (Radical Party; 2% ... ), what is one of the most liberal party in the world, and always debate with my relatives and friends about intolerance. But people worry about these problems only when is personally damaged ...


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