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SluttyShemaleAnna
01-17-2011, 07:34 AM
What should be done with men who are atrocious kissers?

Kissing boot camp? Muscle relaxers injected into their lips and tongue? or should they just be put out of their misery like horse with a broken leg?

Normally, I don't kiss guys ever, but met a guy this weekend n decided hey why not... Well, it didn't take me long to remember why I don't kiss guys. lol

Why why why do guys think it's hot to kiss like they are eating your face off? I hate guys who suck at ur mouth as they kiss, and move thier mouth as fast as they can, like thtey are slurping up noodles or something, its not only unpleasant, but disgusting too. and then slicking thier tongue in ur mouth n just waggling it around. Why would they imagine for a second that is hot?? Is it due to some kind of mental illness?? The phase is slip someone the tongue, not ram them the tongue.

The frustrating thing is tho, why can't they learn?? I say to the guy after his first alleged kiss, to kiss slow, n gentle. after telling him slower about 3 times, he manages something that can be described at tolerable, so I think ok, then next try, total reversion to hungry pig style. Arrrghh!

Why is that out of guys I kissed there have been like maybe 2 good kissers? Not that there aren't girls who can't kiss to save thier life, but I've only had one girl who was an intolerable face muncher.

The big puzzle tho is Why?? Whhhhhhyy don't they realise how fucking AWFUL thier kissing is?? Even if I say, you kiss terrible, n give them tips they just don't learn! What are they thinking? When they were teenagers did they sit there n go, ok, i'm going to kiss this girl, should I do it slow n sensual, hmmm, no, what i'll do is move my jaw like i'm chewing on some gristle, and then just jam my tongue in her mouth and waggle it about like a policeman's truncheon, that will be really sexy, she will love it, especially when I start to suck like a hover.

Anyway, I'm going back to not kissing unless some kind of compulsory kiss testing is implemented.


Ohh, and get this.... You might be thinking, ohh guys get more experienced n better with age, but nooooooo, the 2 good kissers I've had were both the youngest at 20 n 19. I mean, if a guy can't kiss properly by the time he is 30 what is wrong with his brain??



Rant over....

Deposit thoughts here...

smc
01-17-2011, 08:40 AM
What should be done with men who are atrocious kissers? ...

Is it due to some kind of mental illness?? The phase is slip someone the tongue, not ram them the tongue.

The frustrating thing is tho, why can't they learn??

Ohh, and get this.... You might be thinking, ohh guys get more experienced n better with age, but nooooooo, the 2 good kissers I've had were both the youngest at 20 n 19. I mean, if a guy can't kiss properly by the time he is 30 what is wrong with his brain?? ...

Anna, I know exactly what you are talking about. I am over 30, and I like to think I'm a good kisser -- which in my book means thoughtful and sensual.

You ask why men are not? Think about it. When they're kissing during sex, most of them are "thinking" (to the degree they're thinking at all) with their dicks. Good kissing requires thinking with the brain. You'd think the brain, being closer to the mouth than the dick, might win out in such circumstances, but never overestimate the power of a man's dick to rule his actions! :yes:

Let me show you how a man who knows how to kiss does it when I'm next in England!

SluttyShemaleAnna
01-17-2011, 01:45 PM
aww, hehe, i'll give u an exception, you can smootchy me anytime smc, :kiss:

smc
01-17-2011, 01:54 PM
aww, hehe, i'll give u an exception, you can smootchy me anytime smc, :kiss:

Don't think I won't remember that when I next find myself in Yorkshire. ;)

Be_my_nude
01-17-2011, 05:50 PM
Hey kiddos - there's only one thing worse than a man who doesn't know how to kiss properly, and that is a girl who doesn't know how to take it - and I'm one who's tried both, and enjoyed give and take both !

Imagine a response like a wet loose sausage, and you have enough to daunt even the most expert buccalaureat ! So remember girls - don't leave all the work to him ! Encouragement and temptation are equal parts of the equation when it comes to love.

And remember expertise should also be spelt ' expertease ' !

PS I've never been to Yorkshire, but I'm not THAT far away ! !

smc
01-17-2011, 06:18 PM
aww, hehe, i'll give u an exception, you can smootchy me anytime smc, :kiss:

Don't think I won't remember that when I next find myself in Yorkshire. ;)

PS I've never been to Yorkshire, but I'm not THAT far away ! !

Hmmmm, I wonder if any travel agents offer a "kissing tour of the British Isles"?

shae
01-17-2011, 10:47 PM
I've never had a problem kissing. Girls have always told me I was a good kisser.. My cousin taught me how to French kiss when I was 8 or 9 and she was 14. So maybe its something you have to be taught at a young age.

boy.hard
01-18-2011, 04:38 AM
I kiss very badly when I am intimidated by the girl. And often when it's the first time with the girl. It's a good point, because then I become better. Girls think this is cute... Great for me.lol But its interesting to find out what the girl/guy are and feels. (sorry for my english).

merelypink
01-18-2011, 08:56 AM
some one need to make a video or kissing for dummies

Natalie_J
01-18-2011, 10:23 AM
I've met a few women who couldn't kiss very well either so I don't think it's just a male thing.

Perhaps some people need to practise a bit more :)

katieayanami
01-19-2011, 09:21 PM
i am usually a fast kisser my BF tells me to slow down take my time

smc
01-19-2011, 10:18 PM
I've never had a problem kissing. Girls have always told me I was a good kisser.. My cousin taught me how to French kiss when I was 8 or 9 and she was 14. So maybe its something you have to be taught at a young age.

This is just plain disturbing. Where I live, a 14-year-old would get in some serious trouble for that.

franalexes
01-20-2011, 06:44 AM
There once was a guy that seemed odd to kiss.
We discovered why when he had to sit to piss.:rolleyes:

Bionca
01-20-2011, 01:14 PM
ugh... man kisses... lips hurt, teeth get cluncked, chin licked - oh the humanity!!

Like everything, kissing is about give and take, about responding and reacting. Guys, while being aggressive as a kisser, it is important to take cues from your partner. Taking it slowly and building to tongue as she coaxes you with her lips and gives you the OK by slightly parting them for you...

Kissing is a precursor to sex. The signals you send while kissing are telling your partner what you are probably going to be like in bed. Are you a selfish lover who dives in, or are you a lover who tests what works and what doesn't, who responds to your partner's non-verbal cues? To you explore your partner or do you assume that what (you think) worked the last time will work this time?

SluttyShemaleAnna
01-20-2011, 02:01 PM
^^Agrees!^^

Well summed up Bionca.

I particularly dislike the teeth hitting mine.

shadows
01-20-2011, 08:57 PM
Eep! Now I'm always going to wonder if I'm a crappy kisser!:eek:

Dang. If I wasn't the best kisser(I don't have a lot of experience with it, to be honest.:blush:), I would certainly ask my partner if there was any way I could make it more pleasurable for her. I would also take whatever advice that she was willing to give beforehand.:(

no1000
01-21-2011, 11:23 AM
I've only had one girl tell me I'm a bad kisser and that was the first gf I had so...I guess I've been learning the ways. :D

tslust
01-21-2011, 10:31 PM
Eep! Now I'm always going to wonder if I'm a crappy kisser!:eek:

I'll tell you if you're good or bad.;):kiss:

shadows
01-22-2011, 12:31 AM
I'll tell you if you're good or bad.;):kiss:

I'll wait for that opportunity with eager anticipation.;):):hug:

OpenMind
01-23-2011, 12:20 AM
[QUOTE=Bionca;172240]ugh... man kisses... lips hurt, teeth get cluncked, chin licked - oh the humanity!!

Bionca, if you start giving lessons, I'll be the first to sign up.

Katie Girl
01-23-2011, 04:36 AM
I've been told that I'm a wonderful kisser, slow and sensuous with a nice slow tongue when needed.

Even better when we're both wearing lipgloss, it feels and tastes wonderful!